We recognize two realities; one is within life, and one is within analysis, with the latter a verbalized perception.
What we say in analysis is not what we say in life.
"Never hire a _______" is both tongue-in-cheek and it is understood by analysts for what it is.
In this sense, "I love you" is understood sometimes, not as an expression of an emotion, but in analysis, sometimes it is a signal of the time of death in a murder, and at other times, a verbal signal of a poor bonding or relationship.
Fair Shew in the Flesh
We find in open statements, that when one writes, "I am a great mother", there is a correlation to child abuse, including both accusations and even formal investigations. It is seen in the need to assert such, as presented.
We find this, in various forms, in applications at Methadone Clinics particularly when a baby was born addicted to drugs and suffered acutely through withdrawal.
We look into this need to persuade, that is, a need to make a portrayal as a good parent.
There is an olde expression that says, "one is making a fair shew in the flesh" meaning, the "show" is done to satisfy self.
An exaggerated version of this is when one blows a trumpet to announce how much money one is donated to a cause. It is done to cause a presentation where self is highlighted. "Look at me!"
At a supermarket parking lot, a woman viciously tore into her husband about a buckle on the car seat. She caused a stir from the crowd as she gave an extreme reaction to a minor issue with the message:
"Look at me! What a great and concerned mother I am! Only I have this high level of concern for my child! You don't love him as much as I do!"
School teachers often bear the brunt of this. The more negligent the parent, the more the teacher is blamed and even attacked. When it is a negligent father, his bitterness can be frightening.
This often leads to criticizing and tearing down of others.
The "flesh" refers to self gratification and is often seen in narcissistic statements. The guilt of the negligent or abusive parent is countered by an over reaction to a minor issue.
The child, as a novelty, becomes the tool for the parent.
When we encounter, "I am a great mother" in any form, we investigate for a connection to child abuse.
When we encounter "I love you", we investigate for a troubled relationship, whether it be in a domestic homicide or in child abuse.
It is the need to use these words that we explore.
To whom is the subject writing?
When we encounter "...and then I said 'I love you' to my kids and left..." in a police statement, we explore for:
a. child abuse
c. missing information
In the above, the subject has the need to tell police that she loves her kids. This is unnecessary information meaning that it is very important to the analysis.
But did you also notice her "leaving"?
The point of highlighting "left" in an open statement is this:
The person is not thinking of the destination but of the location of the departure.
The person is not thinking forwardly, but is stalled.
This is a statement in which the subject tells us that she is deliberately withholding information around the time of departure, likely associated with the children.
"The Great Mom" in Statement Analysis has its examples.
Recall in the murder of Hailey Dunn in which her mother, Billie Jean Dunn and mother's boyfriend, Shawn Adkins, failed polygraphs, she made this statement.
Hailey's mother and mother's boyfriend had amassed a huge collection of:
bestiality (sexual arousal in abuse of animals)
blood lust videos (sex/violence)
and substance abuse.
The "great mom" had burned a tattoo into one child while moving a violent pedophile into her home, after calling police on him, frightening her now murdered child.
The mother projected her own "norm" on Facebook when she rhetorically asked,
"Who doesn't have some bestiality on their computer?"
She carries her norm in her language and sees perversion everywhere.
The Great Mom is not simply seen in the words "I'm a great mother" alone. Recall the same mother, reporting to the world that her 13 year old had disappeared boasting of just how great a mother she was: "...she wasn't just allowed to go out without asking permission...she wasn't allowed to..."
Rather than focus on the plight of her "missing" child at this critical point, the mother focused upon her own self, and what a great mother she is. She did not realize how she had slipped into past tense language of her missing daughter. The need to focus on self in the very moment when all focus should be upon the child is telling.
Recall the McCanns' early interviews. They did not claim Madeleine was kidnapped (only their supporters did) and did not talk about what Madeleine would have been going through, hour by hour, with a kidnapper.
This is because it did not exist in their memory bank. It did not exist because it was not reality. They did not spend hours stressing over what life must be like for Madeleine; if she had her special blanket, toy or bottle. This was not a concern, therefore, it did not process in the brain, and was not in the memory bank when questioned.
They were, however, great parents who worked diligently in dedicating words to show the exact number of meters away they were when they left their little children home alone, unattended. They devote many more words to self than to Madeleine.
The innocent parents of missing and murdered children speak one language while those of guilty knowledge speak another.
The former blame themselves for any and everything, while the latter not only excuse themselves in portrayal as "good" and even "normal" parents, but the deception eventually causes them to go on the offensive and attack.
The attack can include doubters, and then police and then even to law suits.
The innocent are left bereft of their children and care for nothing else.
The deceptive try to conceal their contempt for the world, but it is inevitable. When one believes oneself smarter than all others in putting over a lie, contempt must come.
In the same sense, they often cling to their supporters but if you listen closely enough, you'll witness the contempt, often passive-aggressive, even as they praise the close circle of those they have successfully deceived.
Parents who have a need to portray themselves in a positive light would not need to do so unless circumstances gave rise. This is why we view it in open statements; they choose their own words and what they feel most important to state.
For training in lie detection for your law enforcement department, business as well as for individual training in home, enroll in our Complete Statement Analysis Course at www.hyattanalysis.com