Thursday, January 9, 2020

Guest Submission: Steven Pagno on Missing Harley Dilly

Harley Dilly is a 14-year-old Port Clinton, Ohio boy and YouTuber who has been missing since he left for school on December 20, 2019. 

He hasn’t been seen since.

The following is a public post by his mother from Facebook. 




Our family wants to thank everyone who has been praying, searching, and sharing. Regardless what anyone thinks about us or our family, Harley Dilly is missing. We want to know he is safe, we want to know he is okay. We want to thank all the agencies involved, the community for their assistance. There are no words to describe the pain, confusion, hurt, and worry we feel. We love and miss him. Every hour that goes by we have to live with knowing he isn't here or found. We are the ones who are being judged by God and the country. We are doing what is necessary and will continue to, to make sure not to impede the investigation. Do you seriously think the police are not looking into everything and everyone? Some of the hateful things being said are so untrue. I have sat back and read every single post. If Harley is seeing this, do you really think he will trust anyone if they are bashing his family? Those who feel he was in a bad home why didn't you speak up? You let him down. I can assure you the police and all involved are looking into things. Stop the hate, bashing, and bullying. Join us tonight at 5pm and let's make a Cokeville Miracle. Light a candle and say a prayer...together we can bring him home safe...I have to believe this. Pray, share, and keep eyes open. 





 ANALYSIS: 

 Our family wants to thank everyone who has been praying, searching, and sharing.

 Does not begin with “I" but with

“Our family” is unexpected for a message from the mother of a missing child. It’s impersonal as we expect the mother to speak primarily for herself and not for others. The context is important: she is writing a social media post.  She is not before the press with her family.  

But note further: 

“Our family” is not “we.” It removes the personal message one more step. We cannot say that the mother “wants to thank everyone” nor that she is included in the crowd of people who “want to thank everyone”, but that it is her….no “our family” (not “my family) who “wants to thank everyone…” 

Ingratiation Priority: Praying Searching Sharing Is the mother religious? 
Does she believe praying is better then searching? Could she list this first to pray for success or guidance?


 Regardless what anyone thinks about us or our family, Harley Dilly is missing

 Still no “I.” 

 Who is “us?” – No social introduction. 

Poor relationship/perception?

 Issues of privacy? 

We don’t see the expected, “my son.” 

Instead,  this is an incomplete social introduction where it removes their relationship. According to the language, we cannot say Harley Dilly is her son. We are dealing with the verbalized perception of reality from the subject; not actual reality known to us. 

We also see that her priority is “what anyone thinks about us or our family…” 

 She is more concerned about the public perception of “us” and “our family” than she is about missing Harley Dilly. This competing motive is not expected. 

Separating “us” and “our family” strengthens the linguistic signal of the aforementioned point that the mother may not be included in “our family.” 

We want to know he is safe, we want to know he is okay. 

 Still no “I” but she is at least including herself in the crowd now. Yet, from a mother who gave birth, we listen for the powerful instinct to engage the language. 

. “…he is safe…he is okay.” Vs. “…IF he is safe…IF he is okay.” - 

She doesn’t allow for the possibility that he is NOT safe or NOT okay. 

We sometimes find that those who do allow for possible death:

a. may have been told so by police 
b. may have guilty knowledge of such
c. may be worn down by time
d. may be pressed by the child's age and ability to survive (self protection, weather elements, etc) 


Denial? – 

Has she entertained any possibility that he may NOT be safe or okay? 

Knowledge that he is safe and okay? 

Did he run away from home? 

 We want to thank all the agencies involved, the community for their assistance

 Still no “I.” Still less than personal from a mother. It is unexpected for a mother to thank police for not finding their child under context. 

If evidence has emerged and the mother has processed it, it may wear down the natural resistance or denial.  

There are other reasons why a biological parent may thank searchers for not finding their child.  




There are no words to describe the pain, confusion, hurt, and worry we feel. 

Priority: Pain Confusion Hurt Worry “Worry” is last in her priority.

What about what Harley is going through?  His vulnerability? 




 Below “confusion” even. 

 We love and miss him. Still no “I.” Still impersonal. 


 Every hour that goes by we have to live with knowing he isn't here or found

 Time is important Still no “I.” Still Impersonal. “knowing he isn’t here or found” vs. “not knowing where he is or if he’s okay” – 

Again we see that concern for his safety is not her top priority.

 Further, she doesn’t tell us she doesn’t know where he is. “Found” is passive. Who is she speaking of as carrying out the activity of “found?” We can’t say it is her or her family. 

 Whose job is it to “find” Harley according to Heather Dilley? 

Let's follow the subject's linguistic disposition and priority: 

 We are the ones who are being judged by God and the country

 The mother seems to be comparing “we” with the public and is being defensive. Consider in context of “Regardless what anyone thinks about us.” 

 Has the mother been accused of having something to do with Harley Dilley’s disappearance? 

Has she created a home environment for him that is not nurturing and protective?



Divinity She acknowledges that she and others (presumably other family members) are being judged by God, Who is all knowing.

This is a very strong signal of potential neglect and/or abuse in the household given the context. 

Some will feel judged by God for not watching a very young child carefully enough----it is a signal of guilt, though it may not be criminal guilt. 

Some parents assign themselves guilt or responsibility where it does not belong.  This includes speculation---"if only I had not gone to work today..." etc. 

 To be judged by the community is to be judged by those who may have the wrong information, but to be judged by God is to be judged justly and for just reason. 

Now consider:

Why the need to publicly state the following: 



 We are doing what is necessary and will continue to, to make sure not to impede the investigation...” 

 Is there more that they could be doing, but is considered “unnecessary?” 

 Why is she not doing “everything” she “can?” “…and will continue to…” Sensitivity noted over “why” they will continue to do what is necessary.

 Is this due to accusations by the public? 

If the searching continues, compared to a missing son, why would it matter? 

 “…to make sure not to impede the investigation.” – 

The mother is indicating that the possibility of impeding the investigation is on her mind. It should be unnecessary information.

 Has she been accused of impeding the investigation?

Has she been less than helpful? 

Has she withheld personal information about the household and its relationship to Harley from investigators?

 If not, then why did this come out in her language? 

 Do you seriously think the police are not looking into everything and everyone? 

 The mother is directing her statement towards a specific audience in the form of a rhetorical question. 

Critics? 

Priortyof what the police are looking into: Everything Everyone Scenarios appear to have priority over “suspects.” 

 This may appear to support that she doesn’t believe he was taken or harmed. 

 Some of the hateful things being said are so untrue.

"hurtful" to whom? Harley?  

Remember: Harley is the victim. 


 “Some of…” not all of. “hateful” qualifies “things.” 

 Are there other “things” that are not “so untrue.” 

 The mother is indicating that “some of the (other) hateful things being said” then ARE true as well as other NON-hatful things being said ARE true. “so untrue” is Need To Persuade. 

 I have sat back and read every single post. 



 The pronoun “I” making it personal and raising the reliability of her writing has now entered the language. 

The mother of a missing boy is now, finally, speaking for herself. 

Question: What brought out this sudden psychological entrance into the statement?  

Answer: The mother 's sense of emotional injury from social media's opinion. 




 “sat back” is unnecessary.

 It suggests a level of comfort/relaxation/passivity, while as body posture; it is also an indication of tension. 

This is somewhat of a declaration of tension where she wishes to appear relaxed, but it very much bothered by peoples' opinions far more, in this statement, than Harley's disappearance. 


 “Sitting back” is something we often do when we tend to stay out of what’s occurring in front of us, which we intend to watch as it unfolds. 

 Her language indicates a level of spectating that one should not expect from the mother of a missing child as it relates to finding him. 

 If Harley is seeing this, do you really think he will trust anyone if they are bashing his family? 

 Allows for the possibility that Harley is seeing the posts and the possibility that he is not. “trust” is an issue. “his family” indicates that she is not considering that he will be more protective of her as his mother, then of his “family” in general.

 Is this because she sees “his family” as a priority over herself? Is this because she doesn’t feel his perception or personality will bring in to want to defend her as an individual? 


 Those who feel he was in a bad home why didn't you speak up?

Here is a very important part of her statement and insight into her thinking and likely home life. 

It is a question (non rhetorical) in an open statement. 


 You let him down. 

She does not deny "bad home" (abuse, neglect, exploitation, failure to protect?)  but shows that she will shift the blame from self to the social media audience in general.  

I


 She isn’t denying he was in a “bad home.” 

 She is deflecting blame to those who “feel he was in a bad home” as being responsible because they didn’t say anything sooner. 

Whatever happened to Harley is not her fault but the public's fault for not reporting her or her family.  

This is the personality type to deflect blame and always claim to be a victim. She is under the crucible of a missing child and her concern is self; not the child. 

  She may be someone who does not takes personal responsibility for her own actions but blames others. 


Next, consider that  “…he was in a bad home…” – may be an embedded admission. 


 I can assure you the police and all involved are looking into things.  

She doesn’t tell the audience that she is playing a personal role in finding Harley. This continues the theme of “I have sat back…” 

Neglect?

 Stop the hate, bashing, and bullying. Join us tonight at 5pm and let's make a Cokeville Miracle. Impersonal again. 

The "hate" is towards her and her family.  

What about Harley? 

Instead, the theme of self continues while her child is missing. 

 “Cokeville Miracle” appears to be a reference to a faith based movie. 

 Light a candle and say a prayer...together we can bring him home safe...I have to believe this. Pray, share, and keep eyes open. “together we can bring him home safe…” – 

She continues the theme of removing herself from personally being devoted to his return. She cannot do it herself, it will take cooperation from the community. 


Analysis Conclusion:

Heather Dilley’s priority/purpose for this writing is to persuade her critics to stop criticism of her and her family. 

She doesn’t make it about finding her son, Harley Dilley. 

 This is unexpected from the mother of a missing child due particularly to the fact that she doesn’t bring herself to say that the need to stop the criticism has anything to do with focusing energy on finding Harley. 

 The language shows that she  is not taking personal responsibility of what happened but blames the public. 

"we" from a mother of a missing child, writing, rather than speaking together with a family: 

 This over use is typical when someone wishes to water down personal responsibility. 

 They will do this with something negative which they see themselves as being responsible for by spreading the responsibility out among a many. It is also used when someone is attempting to share in a piece of undeserved positive responsibility from someone else by including themselves in with the one who truly deserves the recognition. 

 In this case, I suspect it is primarily the latter. We expect that the mother of a missing child, even when with family, including the child’s father, will take it to be so personal, that they will speak primarily for themselves (use of the pronoun “I”). 

She does not do this. 

 We also see that she never refers to Harley Dilley as her “son.” This is also very unexpected from a mother of a missing child, as it indicates a strained or bad relationship with Harley. 

The context is during a time of crisis for the child. 


"my son, Harley" is not part of her language here. 

 She is linguistically indicating that she has psychologically removed the relationship between them. 


 Heather Dilley’s language indicates that she has knowledge or a  belief that Harley may be safe which may cause us to consider that Harley may have departed from the home due to conflict with his mother and possibly others. 

She is very quick, however, to deflect blame. 

It is likely that Harley experienced this with his mother. 

 Mothers of missing children will, despite most odds, hold out hope that their child will return home. 

 They experience a type of natural denial as they can’t bring themselves to accept that they will not get their child back alive.

 Heather Dilley does not violate this principal. 

 However, they will also have a natural worry for their safety. 

 They will publicly call out to them in a way that satisfies the same need to call out to a child that becomes lost in a park or a grocery store. 

 They will speak to concerns that continually haunt them about where their child is, who they are with, what they are feeling, IF they are hurt or IF they are safe. 

 We don’t see this in Dilley’s language. 

 She indicates the opposite, which is a low concern for his safety as well as the indication that she may have knowledge or a strong belief that he is safe. 

She does indicate a strong concern for herself while her son is missing. 

 Her language indicates that she has a personality who refuses personal responsibility and deflects blame onto others. 

 She also indicates that his return home will not be facilitated by her or possibly even her family, but by the community as a whole. It seems as if she believes the community will also share in the responsibility of brining Harley home. This leads to the possibility of neglect by her as a parent and suggests the possibility of prior complaints of such with Children and Family Services or attempted interventions by family or friends (hence the blame shifting). 

 Heather Dilley doesn’t show any linguistic concerns that she has any knowledge that Harley Dilley has been harmed, but she may have some knowledge or idea as to why he is no longer in the home. 

 She shows no indication that she has any strong need and/or desire for him to come home to her personally, as his mother. 

 Heather Dilley appears to accept the notion that Harley was in a “bad home” despite the lack of personal responsibility she takes for that fact. 

The lack of concern for Harley by his mother is startling. 

The poor relationship is evident in her avoidance of natural connection to her son, as well as the priority of her emotions rather than Harley's safety and wellbeing. 


 Consider as a possibility that Heather Dilley doesn’t have the desire for Harley Dilley to return home and that she may even have information as to where he might be found, or who he may be with.

Could Harley have met up with dangerous individuals through the internet? 

Did the household contribute to this possible scenario? 

The subject likely has mental health issues that impacted Harley. 

Substance abuse should be explored. 

Mother is manipulative, which is often seen within substance abusers. 

Substance abusers often see themselves as victims of family, friends, doctors, society at large, and even God.  They sometimes articulate that there is a seeming conspiracy of life against them.  

Mother does not give indication in this statement that Harley is dead or has met foul play.  

There may have been an altercation just prior to Harley's departure. 

Police reported: 

"He has a very particular schedule. He eats certain foods and bathes sometimes four or five times a day. If he goes to a friend’s house he will go to the house and return to bathe before going to the friend’s house for the rest of the day. He stays around the house fairly often,”

This is often a need to control one's environment due to the chaos and out of control lifestyle under abuse. 


To study deception detection, or to host a seminar, please visit Hyatt Analysis Services 

67 comments:

Rachel said...

Well done Steven!! Thank You!

John Mc Gowan said...

Excellent analysis, thank you.

........

If Harley is seeing this, do you really think he will trust anyone if they are bashing his family? Those who feel he was in a bad home why didn't you speak up?

Was there physical abuse within the family?

Anonymous said...

Well said! Hince, the fact you said "we can not say Harley Dilly is her son."

Shari said...

Further statement from mother:

"You see everything on TV, you watch all these crime shows and you think, 'oh, that's never going to happen.' And they solve it in an hour. It doesn't take an hour to find out everything," she said. "I love you Harley, please come home. Please, I just… We need you, I don't believe that you ran, but if you did just please, this isn't you."

Unknown said...

I wonder about the bathing thing. Maybe Harley has OCD or some other form of anxiety that makes him want to bathe often. But I remember Peter posting about women in violent marriages prioritizing their time in the bathroom so they could be behind a locked door and feel "safe" or in control. Does that hold true for a child?

Statement Analysis Blog said...

John Mc Gowan said...
Excellent analysis, thank you.

........

If Harley is seeing this, do you really think he will trust anyone if they are bashing his family? Those who feel he was in a bad home why didn't you speak up?

Was there physical abuse within the family?
January 9, 2020 at 10:53 AM


An astute observation of the language (listening!) and the right question to ask. Well done, John.


Peter

Statement Analysis Blog said...

Unknown said...
I wonder about the bathing thing. Maybe Harley has OCD or some other form of anxiety that makes him want to bathe often. But I remember Peter posting about women in violent marriages prioritizing their time in the bathroom so they could be behind a locked door and feel "safe" or in control. Does that hold true for a child?
January 9, 2020 at 2:39 PM


It is very concerning.

Peter

Joe said...

If I was searching for Harley Dilley, what would I be looking for? The last sentence of the post says "keep eyes open". Keep eyes open for what? She offers no physical description of height, weight, eye colour, hair length or color, scars/birthmarks etc, nor the clothes he was last seen wearing.

Anonymous said...

Chosen Won's youtube account went silent for the entire week during which Harley disappeared.

Anonymous said...

If I had just read the statement I would have had no idea it was Harley Dilly's mother who was speaking.

frommindtomatter said...

That is excellent in depth analysis Steven, I enjoyed reading it.

Adrian.

Joe said...

"....we have to live with knowing he isn't here or found."

This phrase bothers me but I'm not sure why. The expression is often used by those who have made a grave error and "have to live" with 'knowing" what they did had unfortunate consequences. It is an expression of regret akin to "if only...".

I'm also bothered by the words "he isn't here or found". The "or found" seems to allow for finding Harley deceased, or at the very least, if Harley was "found" that he would not return "here". Otherwise the word "found" would be redundant because if Harley was "here" he would obviously be "found".

I totally agree with the statement analysis of the next line - "We are the ones who are being judged by God".






We are the ones who are being judged by God and the country.

Anonymous said...

I don't think the Mom hurt or killed him though. I think a serial killer snatched him off the street. There is an article that says he gave his phone number out online when he was 12 encouraging people to call him.

This has the same vibe as the Delphi killing as well as the killing of Lyric and Elizabeth.

Statement Analysis Blog said...

elf said...
If I had just read the statement I would have had no idea it was Harley Dilly's mother who was speaking.
January 10, 2020 at 12:12 AM

very good.

It is to see the statement, not as reality, but the subject's own verbalized perception.

In the statement, the victim is "not" her son.

Peter

Anonymous said...

Anon at 10:49, I get a Katie Beers vibe from this case.

Eddie400 said...

What do you guys think of this husband’s plea to help find his wife?
I found it interesting he said “There is no script for this.”
Scroll down in article for video of husband.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7876165/Husband-tearfully-pleads-help-finding-wife-37-mysteriously-vanished-Florida.html

Anonymous said...

Anon 11:21,

Very interesting...I just read up on the Katy Bears case....it’s interesting you get that vibe bc when I pictured where he is I feel he is still alive and being held somewhere in a dungeon-like setting. I think someone preyed on him due to his vulnerability stemming from his home life as well as his small size & I do think he is alive. Has there been any mention of whether he had a cell phone on him when he vanished? Any pings from it at any point? It is urgent they find him.

Laura said...

Eddie

He refers to her in past tense around 1:30 in that video. He says “She WAS my best friend”. She has only been missing 2 days.

Hey Jude said...

Here are some things which Heather Dilly, Harley’s mother, said earlier, around new year, in a Facebook video which is no longer available. I don’t know if the quotes are the full content of the video - they are here:

http://www.sanduskyregister.com/story/201912310010

“You all want to see what I look like when I’m not taking my meds to help? You want to know what it’s like to have a son missing? It hurts. It makes you feel like you can’t go on. But you have to go on. You don’t understand. You seriously don’t know what it feels like.”

I don’t believe that he was a runaway. I’m going to say it. I don’t care. He is not a runaway. That’s not like him. He does not do this stuff. He’s a mama’s boy. He has a routine.”

You guys are such monsters. I can’t believe that you would be like this to a family... He is my son. I love him and I want him home. Let him go if you have him. Let our family move on, please.”

I’m tired of holding on. I want you home. ... Please Harley I need you... I am so tired... you people are so mean. You people are so cruel. Just think of him. I don’t care what you think of me or my husband. Please, just please, leave us alone if you’re going to be mean. Just look for him. Please, I beg of you, to please look for him. He is my son. He is a child. He is innocent. You guys can judge us when he comes home, but until then you let him be. You let him be. You just search. Please pray for us. I’ve never prayed so hard in my life.”

Nadine Lumley said...

She has no words to describe the pain, confusion, hurt, and worry we feel.

She has no words. There is no pain etc. for het to describe?


.

Nadine Lumley said...

Agreed. This was a barn burner.

😔

Nadine Lumley said...

guys are such monsters

🤐

Paully2019 said...

"We want to thank all the agencies involved, the community for their assistance."
We do not usually thank police and services for something they have not done which is find her son. More often than not deceptive people will thank the services.
The word "bashing" is used twice by the subject. It is therefore sensitive to the subject. Possible leakage. When deceptive people try to deceive, what are they thinking about? They are thinking about what they did.
As others have stated there is much distancing language.
I also point to something she said on the day he dissapeared when interviewed.
"I didnt see him, I spoke to him. Theres a difference"
How did she speak to him when she didnt see him and his phone was presumably broken. Also note the distancing language by using the word "him" twice and not using his name.
My thoughts are to have the police go back and ask What Happened on the day prior to his disappearance and the morning of his disappearance.
I would like to hear the call that was made reporting the disappearance.

Autumn said...

Harley has a youtube channel. One of his videos (August 31, 2019) catches an argument between his parents. See here (from 5:00 to 7:32 including transcription): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qSduyLxoiMs . His dad is yelling and enraged at Harley’s little brother because he spilled pop all over electrics. His mom is yelling at his dad, saying that the boy is only 4 years old and didn’t do it on purpose. She screams (among other things):

“You’re mean. I don’t fucking like this. This shit that you do. It does. You are so fucking mean. He is a child! It was an accident. He’s gonna sit there and say, “Oh I’m gonna fuck up my mom and dad’s stuff?”

Did Harley’s dad physically do something to his brother given that his mom says she doesn’t like the sh*t “you do” (“do” instead of “say”). Harley repeatedly apologizes to his audience for his dad, saying his dad is mad and rude and being an *sshole (“my bad”).

Even though the mom is vehemently defending the brother it must be a very scary situation for kids to hear their parents yell like that.

Maybe “I have sat back” / “why didn’t you speak up” / “You let him down” / “stop the hate, bashing and bullying” (see below statement) reflect feelings of guilt for not defending Harley enough in a toxic home:

”Some of the hateful things being said are so untrue. I have sat back and read every single post. If Harley is seeing this, do you really think he will trust anyone if they are bashing his family? Those who feel he was in a bad home why didn't you speak up? You let him down. I can assure you the police and all involved are looking into things. Stop the hate, bashing, and bullying.

Harley’s bathing and eating routine may be an attempt to get a grip on an overwhelming situation.

Hey Jude said...

She says, “Harley Dilly is missing” rather than, “My son is missing”, or “My son, Harley, is missing.” Why the full name? “Harley Dilly” is the name of both his YouTube channels. Does she believe or know his disappearance has something to do with his YouTubes?

—-

I read the posts on the previous page, and see she is consistent in using her air time to unburden herself of grievances about people’s perceptions of the family, whilst Harley is a lesser concern. If Harley were able to listen to much of what his mother has said, would it give him much incentive or desire to go home? It sounds as if she is emotionally dependent upon him, missing his support, and not concerned to burden him further, should he be listening in captivity, or voluntarily in hiding.

Maybe she does not anticipate the return of Harley Dilly - If she believed him to be alive, and endangered, how could he not be her focus and priority?

Why as time goes on, is he no longer referred to as “my son” - why is it it “we” who love him, rather than “I”? Is it because she believes he is dead, and blames him for dying? Does she believe he committed suicide? Does she believe he’s chosen to live in hiding with someone in preference to his family?

Why does she make public things which would embarrass him? The grandfather wants Harley to know how depressed his mother is, and how much she needs him, too - maybe a pattern of adult neediness placed upon a child? How would they sound to Harley? Are they even trying, really, to appeal to him? Well, if I was Harley listening to all that, I’d be legging it, in the opposite direction.



Hey Jude said...

I have seen a couple of his YouTubes. There is one in which he expressed his concerns about his mother, who had been hospitalised with a heart attack - he’d been staying with an aunt for a while, and not making videos.

There’s another, which I have not seen, but read of on Redditt, in which the mother is said to have slapped the baby brother when he tried to climb a safety gate into Harley’s room. Also via Reddit, three known instances of DV in the home.

I saw the Plunder channel video on the argument which Harley had uploaded, too; who knows what other domestic indiscretions may have made the backdrop to any of his other hundreds of videos?


Autumn said...

I hope Harley ran away and is not in captivity. It seems the best scenario. But in that case I assume he receives help from (an)other person(s). And in that case, would he not have come out of his hiding place by now? Wouldn't all the publicity and attention in the US and abroad prompt him to let us know where he is? Or does it have the opposite effect on him? Wouldn't his "accomplice(s)" urge him to come out of his hiding place or tell his parents/police/media? It's been several weeks since he's gone missing now.

Hey Jude, yes, the mother seems emotionally dependent on him. It's as if Harley is the adult in the family. I saw a few more youtube videos, also the one in which he expressed concerns about her. He talks like he is older than 14.

Hey Jude said...

Yes, poor boy, he felt he had to end his video game to go and find out what was happening with his family as the arguing continued - as would a parent. If it was him in the CCTV image, he did not look as if he was planning or prepared to run away - or to go to school, as he had no bag or backpack, and was lightly dressed.

—-

Is the mother psychologically disowning him because his YouTubes have caused people to pass judgement on “the family”? His disappearance has brought them under scrutiny, possibly CPS would become involved - she’s not denying that it was a bad home.

If it is true that the younger child is both nephew and adopted brother to Harley, Harley’s video of their father shouting at, and both parents arguing over the younger child, could have caused upset and division in the wider family. Perhaps the “us” refers to her, or to her and the father, and “the family” to the daughter whose son they adopted, or other relatives. Who knows what might be going on in addition to Harley missing, and for which his mother might be blaming the “Harvey Dilly” YouTube channels? I think it odd she used his name as she did, and it’s worrying how her focus is on public perception of the family rather than for her missing son.

They want to thank people, they want to know Harley is safe, and okay - she doesn’t say here that they want him to come home. In the earlier unavailable video she said she needed and wanted him home, and used the personal pronoun. Did something change to make her move from her wanting and needing him home to them (just?) wanting to know he is safe and okay? Is it due to the passage of time - does she think he is dead? Might it be because she believes he is not likely to be returned home if he is found? Is it because his disappearance has damaged the family’s image, which is somehow more important to her than Harley? Was it always that way?

Heather Dilly is taken up with the family’s feelings and what they are going through rather than stressing over what might have happened, or yet be happening, to her son. She plays for sympathy for herself via “us” and “our family”. His well-being is not a concern though he went missing in tennis shoes and light clothing and without a working phone. The lack is seen in cases where the parent knows there are no longer any physical needs and that the child is safe in the sense that no further harm can befall him or her. Is that the only explanation, or might her lack of concern be due to a belief Harley is with someone she trusts, or to an ongoing neglect of his needs, to a preoccupation with her ill health, which could be serious, or what?

“I have sat back and read every single post.” That must have taken some time. “Sat back” suggests leisurely pastime to me - sit back and watch a film, read a book, relax, eat popcorn. Perhaps you would be interested in what people online had to say, if it could help find him. Every single post, though - is she worried that someone will say something in particular? If I were her, I don’t think I’d do that, or at least not admit to it, if there was a possibility Harley might be watching or reading what I said. Why willing to give such attention to those people who write “hateful’, ‘nasty’, ‘cruel’ comments, while he is still missing?

She seems conflicted - first she wants and needs him, later she doesn’t - they just want to know he’s safe and okay. Maybe she has reason to believe that whatever happened, Harley won’t be coming home. At the least, she might be expected to say that he was lightly dressed when he went missing, and his phone was broken. - What’s the temperature, has there been snow? Did he have any money for food, or means of transport? Basic needs, of which she says nothing - maybe she knows he has no needs.

Interesting she introduces God’s judgement on the family rather than God’s help or upholding of them.


LuciaD said...

Wonderful analysis Steve. What a rich statement!

Laura said...

I think he's in captivity.

The mother is a narcissist and I am sure the home environment sometimes made Harley want to run away, however, I think it is highly unlikely that Harley has gone on the run and adopted a new identity to elude detection.

There are multiple serial killers in that general area with police and FBI doing little to nothing productive to catch them...Delphi police refuse to release a single tidbit of info that could assist in the capture of the Delphi killer (who I believe also killed Lyric and Elizabeth). There is also a serial killer in Detroit...we all know who I think that is...but he is killing prostitutes in Detroit so police don't really care...but I highly doubt his killing is restricted to prostitutes only.

I think Harley is in grave danger.

frommindtomatter said...

I was trying to find more quotes by the Grandfather. I posted one a while back where he was using past tense language when he was describing Harley. I believe it was at a vigil held on the 29th Dec meaning Harley would have been missing for about 9 days.

Harley’s grandfather told WEWS-TV that the disappearance has been tearing the family up.

“You don’t know how it’s tearing us up,” Harley’s grandfather said to News 5 at the vigil. “It can happen to anybody’s child.”

“My grandson had issues and he wasn’t a perfect boy, but he was a good boy,” he said. “And he loved his mother and he loved his family.”

The Grandfathers language tells us his state of mind. He believes Harley is no more. What leads him to think in such a way? What I find interesting is he says “It can happen to anybody’s child.” What can “happen to” anybody’s child, what is the “it”?

“It” speaks to something which is known/believed. Where does the knowledge or belief come from? Also “can happen to” as opposed to “could happen”. “Could” offers the possibility whereas “can” is much stronger and shows belief, possibly coming from experience.

The grandfathers language is strong in respect to his belief Harley is no more. According to him “it” happened “to” Harley. Is the “it” the Grandfathers worst nightmare or “could” he know more. I don’t know. Bear in mind whatever happened, happened “to” him. (Harley)

If Harley had gone to his grandparents to cool off after leaving home and had an accident for instance, when reflecting on what had happened would “it" can happen to anybody`s child” be a statement that would be in someone’s mind who had knowledge of “it”?

Adrian.

Autumn said...

Maybe the grandfather thinks Harley was depressed ("had issues") and did something to himself. Depression "can happen to anybody's child". What I find sad is that the grandfather says "anybody's child" instead of "anybody" or "any child". The connotation is: it's not the parents' fault. Even his granddad focuses more on the impact on Harley's parents/mother than on Harley's fate/situation.

Autumn said...

Another statement by the grandfather (I believe already posted in the comment section of a previous blog post):

"If you're out there and you're hearing this or seeing this, we all want you home. Your mom feels, is in the deepest depression you've ever seen. She needs you to lay on her and hug her like you used to. We miss you, son. Come home, please."

Both the mother and grandfather repeatedly talk about feelings of depression and not being able to cope without medication and that sort of thing. Of course it is normal to have such feeling because their (grand)son is missing. At the same time I cannot remember another case in which relatives focused so much on their own/another relative's depression and medication in the context of their missing child. Maybe they are unwittingly signalling a fear that Harley is missing due to (his own) depression and medication.

Mark said...

I wonder if Peter could post this piece of writing the FBI has released and comment about it and let us discuss.

The FBI cannot figure out what this note is all about that was found in a murder victim's pocket decades ago.

They have asked for the public's help including any thoughts or ideas about it. It is a cipher that none of their experts could solve. I realize it is unlikely we will solve the cipher...I am interested moreso in whether we can use our statement analysis skills to determine something of the writer's intent.

https://www.fbi.gov/news/stories/help-solve-an-open-murder-case-part-2

Mark said...

My only thoughts are that I wonder if, towards the end of the 2nd page of the note,

TLSE represents Toulouse, France

and whether the last line is a numerical lock code to a safe or something

Oddly some part of the note have the cadence of Middle English albeit with missing vowels it seems in certain words like "SPRKE" which means a burning or glowing object.

Mark said...

I think he's mixing different languages together--Spanish and Middle English and others and leaving out the vowels in the middle of the words...he leaves the "E" on the end of words.

Nadine Lumley said...

The deepest depression

Could also be a big hole in the ground....

yikes

.

Paully2019 said...

A more recent video interview done by the mother.
The mother says "I,I,I just don't know what else to say" and "we just love him and you need to come home"
The word "just" is an additional word. We can remove the word "just" and the sentence will still be plausible. The mother is thinking of something else in comparison and I also note I becomes we once more. The mother is also using distancing language by referring to Harley as "him"
I believe the mother is remaining deceptive and does indeed know more. Is there an emergency call available?

Paully2019 said...

Also note the mother says I,I,I. Break in the speed of transmission.

Anonymous said...

*hence

Anonymous said...

Is there a chance her words tell us that she has him hidden away? That this is all a stunt?

frommindtomatter said...

Paully2019 said...

A more recent video interview done by the mother.

The mother says "I,I,I just don't know what else to say"

Yes there is another thought held, but in context the “just” could be her thinking of what else she can say. That fits with the transmission problem on the stuttering “I” which shows uncertainty. The stuttering is acting as a pause to think and when no other information is found the word “just” comes into her language.

I think her problem is that she feels responsible for his disappearance/running away, and that has made her sensitive and more distant in her language.

It`s interesting there are no statements by the father (at least I have not found any). That he will not speak suggests he too has guilt issues concerning why Harley left.

Adrian.

Statement Analysis Blog said...

Could be Rx


Peter

frommindtomatter said...

Anonymous said... January 13, 2020 at 3:59 AM

“Is there a chance her words tell us that she has him hidden away? That this is all a stunt?”

Well…, it would depend on context. Check this link.

https://www.cleveland19.com/2020/01/11/mother-makes-plea-find-harley-dilly-community-organizes-search/

Start watching at the 40 seconds mark. Harley’s mother says:

“this has been bigger than we had ever imagined, the support and love for our son”
As the interview is broken up the context is harder to discern. It was given during the organizing of a community search. If we take the context of “this” to mean the search, then the statement is appropriate, but she tells us that something “had” been imagined which speaks to past thought. The question could be asked when this past thought was held.

A simpler statement in regards to the search would be “We never expected such a big response” or something similar. Also she says “this has been bigger” speaking to the past as opposed to “this is bigger”. It all comes down to context.

Body language experts (which I am not) will notice when the mother says “please come home” she closes her eyes. Does that mean she is picturing him returning in her mind, or that she does not want to see him/can’t see it happening?

He Jude mentioned in an earlier comment something interesting. That the mother said “Harley Dilly is missing” in reference to her son which is a little strange, sounds like a film title. So as Hey Jude said, is it “Harley Dilly” who is missing or “my son Harley”?

Adrian.

Mark said...

Peter, That was funny :)

Hey Jude said...

https://www.cleveland19.com/2020/01/14/police-activity-reported-near-port-clinton-home-harley-dilly/

By John Deike | January 13, 2020 at 7:41 PM EST - Updated January 13 at 7:47 PM
PORT CLINTON, Ohio (WOIO) - Port Clinton police are investigating near the home of Harley Dilly, the 14-year-old Port Clinton boy who disappeared nearly a month ago.

Authorities will not confirm whether the police activity is related to the Dilly case, but the Ohio Bureau of Criminal Investigation is in the area as well.
Port Clinton Police and Fire, Ohio BCI, U.S. Marshals, the Ottawa Sheriff’s Department and U.S. Border Patrol have scoured the area using boots on the ground, tracking dogs and helicopters, in the hopes of finding the boy.
Dilly was last seen on Dec. 20, while walking to school.
The boy’s home is located in the 500 block of East 5th Street, near Fulton Street.
Return to 19 News for updates on this developing story.

Katinjax said...

Port Clinton Police holding Tuesday news conference for an update on missing teen; State says teen has been ‘Recovered’
The Port Clinton Police are holding a press conference on the disappearance of the 14-year-old Port Clinton teen, Harley Dilly.
By
Alan Rodges

Published 12m at 8:21 AM

Tania Cadogan said...

PORT CLINTON - The more than three-week search for missing teen Harley Dilly appears to have come to an end on Monday night.

The Port Clinton Police Department announced shortly after 3:30 a.m. on Tuesday that they would be holding a news conference at noon today regarding the update in the investigation of Dilly’s disappearance, according to Chief Rob Hickman.

While Hickman did not yet elaborate on the specific nature of the update, a member of the Dilly family shared in a post on Facebook that police have confirmed Harley was found dead on Monday.

Port Clinton police and members of the Ohio Bureau of Criminal Investigation began searching inside a vacant house in the 500 block of East 5th Street, which is across the street from the Dilly home, on Monday night.

According to multiple reports, a coroner was also present at the scene of the house on Monday night and authorities were seen removing a portion of the home’s wall.

https://eu.portclintonnewsherald.com/story/news/2020/01/14/search-harley-dilly-ends-family-member-reports-teen-found-dead/4463722002/

John Mc Gowan said...

Family members say hes been found dead

https://www.portclintonnewsherald.com/story/news/2020/01/14/search-harley-dilly-ends-family-member-reports-teen-found-dead/4463722002/

Autumn said...

According to police Harley tried to enter a vacant house via the chimney and got trapped because the chimney was blocked between the 2nd and 1st floor. This is too sad for words.

Anonymous said...

I know Harley's body was found in a chimney, but there must be more to the story. Cameras spotted him near the school. Did someone with him, call in a lead? Or did someone with him tell another kid? Once kids start talking it will get back to parents and the police.

Also, no k9? I didn't see mention of it. If Harley walked back to that house from the school area, a dog could have tracked that scent. In this day and age, if the town didn't have k9, they could have called a neighboring town or called to have one brought in.

Lastly, this was a very good analysis. I can't believe the mom has no knowledge based on her statements. Could pure guilt for being a bad mom make her talk that way?

Many questions left now that Harley has been found that are unanswered.

GetThem

Anonymous said...

They just found him, he died in a chimney after getting stuck entering an abandoned house

Nadine Lumley said...

That is heartbreaking. That poor boy. Can you imagine how long you would have to be stuck in a chimney before you died. I don't want to think about this.


UGGGGGHHHGGG ARGGGGGGG

Anonymous said...

How do they know that someone didn't kill him and then dump his body down the chimney to the abandoned house?

I know one person who loves abandoned houses and in fact, just today, put up a video about abandoned houses in Detroit and explained how to get into them, etc.

Absolute BS....the kid was smart...he didn't try to jump down a chimney, he was dumped down a chimney.

Video Chosen Won put up just today on abandoned buildings, how they are entered, etc

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6oKCcWkKBUg&t=180s

Shari said...

According to one article I read, Harley's jacket and glasses were found on the second floor of the house. If that is true it means he was already inside the house before he tried to enter it through the chimney. In other words there was no need for him to use the chimney as an entry.

Anonymous said...

The mother has also introduced “closed doors” in another facebook post, as well as this reference to showering, do we consider sexual abuse? I would like to see more analysis of her many lengthy statements. I would post screen shots if it were permitted.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous Anonymous said...
How do they know that someone didn't kill him and then dump his body down the chimney to the abandoned house?”

I have same question. If I am meant to believe Harley could scale the antenae and roof in 18 degree snowy weather, why shouldn’t I believe a grown man could do so, with a 100 pound kid over his shoulder? I just do not buy that Harley, looked into a 9X13 inch chimney, two stories tall, and decided to squeeze his head through and attempt to fall... to where? If he did, and he landed against a blocked section, would we anticipate that momentum would break bones in his legs?
Also, is it odd that the coronor is supposedly declaring a cause of death, on the police chief’s stationary, before the autopsy is complete? Should an autopsy take more than a couple hours?

Anonymous said...

12:42,

Someone dumped him down the chimney if his glasses and jacket were already on the 2nd floor of the house...they can't put 2 and 2 together and figure that out?

He was a smart kid and besides I"m sure there were much convenient ways of entering the building.

My first suspect would be C.W. who loves abandoned buildings and is very interested in how they are entered etc.

In his recent videos he is asking the prostitutes all nervously why the police presence has been greater on the weekends (which is when he swings into town to interview the girls). He is hiding something and it is connected to the deaths of the prostitutes.

I am curious how they found Harley? What led them to that abandoned building and inside the chimney???

As far as coroner declaring cause of death...he could have been strangled and that can be hard to detect plus he was there for 2 weeks in the chimney...obviously they need to do an autopsy...a thorough one.

Anonymous said...

"Hold my beer and watch this"?

https://www.wtol.com/article/news/local/harley-dilly-coat/512-5f21f3fc-5c5e-4a67-b775-ae117d12c18e

Hey Jude said...

Poor Harley, and so sad he was so close to home. I read he may have died within fifteen minutes of being inside the chimney, so he was likely to have been dead long before he was reported missing. I can believe that a mischievous teen who wanted a safe place to hide out might try to access a vacant house via a chimney, and that he would have been able to scale the antenna, cross the roof and squeeze himself into the 9 x 13 chimney, and that if he had intended to do that, it would have made sense to wear tennis shoes and thin clothes rather than boots and bulkier clothes. A heated vacant house across the street might have been attractive as a place to camp out if there had been an argument at home. There must have been more obvious points of access, but maybe there were sensor alarms on windows.

It seems a reasonable explanation that he was able to push his jacket and glasses out through a flue vent but could not get himself out, also that he was unlikely to have known how chimneys work, or that it had been blocked and there would be no way out once he was in.

I doubt his jacket was found hanging on the closet door - most likely it was put there by the investigators - some wall had to be removed to access the chimney - they would have moved the jacket out of the way.

Something which does seem strange is how a boy who bathed several times a day could bring himself to enter a dirty chimney -but maybe he didn’t know the water was turned off in the house and that he wouldn’t be able to bathe.

I wonder why did the public need to know that Harley bathed a lot? You’d never think a boy who needed always to be clean would even think to go down a chimney.

It is strange that forty hours passed before Harley was reported missing - it’s not clear by whom.

Did one of the parents see something and have an idea it could be solved within an hour? Can it be ruled out that they didn’t have any idea he was there, maybe imagining that he was fine and warm and eating whatever was in the pantry and freezer, in the first week, at least, and would come home of his own accord when he was hungry? If I was one of his parents, I might think he was trying for some attention to grow his YouTube. I’d likely be mortified if I thought he’d broken into a neighbour’s house, so maybe I would wait a while to see if he would just tire of it and come home quietly - but as time went on, how would I admit that I’d had an idea he might have been there all along? I might convince myself he couldn’t really be there now because it had been checked out, at least externally, during the searches - he must have moved on. It would be worrying, but not so desperately worrying if I thought he was across the street, and okay - it would have to take a turn after a few days when he didn’t come home and also wasn’t found.

If I had seen something, might it have been Harley climbing up to the roof, on the roof, entering the chimney - or might I just have seen him checking out possible access points around the house at some earlier date?

Is it relevant that mother said: “Do you seriously think the police are not looking into everything and everyone?” They hadn’t looked INTO the vacant house, or into the chimney then - and that followed the statement about the family doing everything necessary, and making sure not to impede the investigation. If they were only doing what was “necessary”, was there something else which they could be doing/saying, but were not considering “necessary”? “We’re doing everything we can” would be more expected? “Necessary” doesn’t seem as helpful as “doing everything”.

If the CCTV image really does show Harley walking across the street outside his house, with nothing and in tennis shoes - shouldn’t the search have concentrated much closer to home from the beginning? It probably wouldn’t have changed the outcome, but Harley could have been recovered sooner.

The case has been closed so probably there won’t be any more questions.

Statement Analysis Blog said...

Hey Jude,

I think fleeing makes sense. The delay and the mother's language ---

I don;'t think Harley had an easy life.

Peter

Hey Jude said...


Peter,

No, me neither, and probably it was more fleeing and desperation than mischief and curiosity which led to the shocking outcome. I’d rather think the poor tragic boy died of mischief and curiosity than out of desperation, though what anyone would rather think doesn’t make it true - this I know.

—-

Thank you, and Steven, for publishing the analysis. It is even more impressive as read retrospectively, clarified and confirmed as more about Harley and his life becomes known.

lynda said...

Peter's analysis was on the money.

This was fairly local to me.

There are youtube videos that Harley made that are heartbreaking. His life was not easy. Much abuse. Dad drank/mom drugs.

On one video, Harley is outside swinging on the swingset because his mother has locked him out of the house and left. In the dead of winter. She was gone several hours and pissed that Harley did not want to come with her to pick up someone. Instead he wanted to stay home and do homework. She locked him out of house. Harley stated he was afraid he made a mistake in not going as his mother threatened to call the cops on him and have him taken away. He says the only person he trusts to tell what his home life was like is his principal.

Locally, mom was posting on social media trying to gain sympathy & funds. Dad and mom NEVER went on searches, and they waited 2 days to call and report because Harley took off A LOT because he couldn't take it. He would be gone overnight and then come home. Numerous neighbors took to local SM to state that they would put Harley up for the night, he would go from place to place, looking for a place to stay when she locked him out or refused him food. These neighbors were absolutely livid that Harley was never removed. Childrens services had been called numerous times with nothing being done.

Harleys older sister posted on SM that she fled the state to get away from mom when she was old enough as she was beyond controlling/abusive.

Sad end for a sad boy. His parents didn't give ONE DAMN about his health or well-being.

lynda said...

Forgot to add that Harley went missing the last day of school before the Christmas holiday. It was reported locally that Harley asked his mother to stay home that day as he didn't feel well. Of course, she said no and kicked him out. She made him leave the house 2 hours early for school (which is why he was out at 530-6 AM when school started at 8)
I guess he was just supposed to walk around in the cold for 2 hours, feeling sick, as opposed to at least being allowed to wait at home until right before school.

The school tried numerous times to call, and left messages for his mom when he didn't show up for school but she never answered the calls, nor answered the messages.

This boy had NO ONE that gave a shit about him. His parents should have been in jail long ago for their treatment of him IMO

M said...

Lynda, you are so right that no one cared, poor boy-

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7917445/Teen-dead-chimney-missing-2-days-report.html

Unknown said...

I completely agree that Harley may be OCD or may have been bathing frequently as a way to feel safe behind a locked door. However, bathing multiple times a day is also a sign of abuse, depression, or a negative, sexual, or traumatic experience that the child is trying to wash away. According to multiple articles and videos regarding this case, Harley showed many other signs of abuse in the home as well.

Unknown said...

And very truthful