Sunday, January 26, 2014

Statement Analysis of Tammy Moorer Post


Does Tammy Moorer know something about the disappearance of Heather Elvis?




Question for Analysis:  Does Tammy Moorer possess guilty knowledge, from her husband, Sidney, about the disappearance of Heather Elvis, with whom her husband had an affair?

I have taken her statement posted, below, in italics, with plain text showing the analysis.

"Well Sidney cheated" begins her posted statement.  Where someone begins the statement is often the most important part of the statement, and may even be the reason for the statement.

"Well" is sometimes used when one has been debating within oneself whether or not to make a reluctant admission.  In speech, it is a pause, calling our attention to the need to think.  In writing, it can be considered the same thing.  "Well, I finally decided..." shows the pause of, perhaps, internal debate.

"Sidney" is not given status of "my husband" which indicates a poor relationship. A complete social introduction would be "my husband Sidney..." and would indicate a good relationship.  In context, the negative relationship is appropriate.

Please note that in order to "cheat" rules must be broken, or "cheated" against.   This stands in opposition to the "open marriage" she reported later.

"psycho whore" is her first introduction of Heather Elvis.

This is her choice of words to describe the "other woman" of whom her husband had a relationship with.  This is an interesting choice of words.  First,  "psycho" indicates negative mental health, while "whore" is used to describe a woman of immodesty.  Why would one who claims to be in an "open marriage" call the young missing woman a "whore"?  We look for answers within the statement itself.

"who has since went missing" and not  "is missing."  "Went" is past tense.  "Is missing" is present tense and shows its focus on the present distress:  a young woman missing.  The subject is in the past, which makes sense since she began with Sidney cheated"  Her concern is not the welfare of the young woman, or assisting in her recovery.

"her crazy daddy" is not her "distraught father"

"is threatening" is present tense.  Note she does not quote what he said.  What if he said, "What would you be like if your child was missing?" and she turned this into a "threat."  Threats are often capable of causing an emotional response triggering a quote.

"therefore, making Sidney stupid."  Note that Sidney cheating on her does not make him stupid, but the reaction from Terry Elvis, desperate to find his daughter, has made Sidney "stupid."  Is this because he chose the wrong woman to cheat with?  Is this because the woman he cheated with went missing?  Has Sidney told her the truth about their relationship?

Has Sidney told her the truth about his last contact with Heather Elvis?

"this girl" is now her second choice of words after "pyscho whore" she is now "this" (close) and "girl", not "woman."

"naming him!" uses an exclamation point.  Note what triggers an exclamation point and what does not.

Heather Elvis going missing does not trigger exclamation point.
Sidney cheating does not trigger exclamation point. That he is "named" is very important to her, with the context being social media account.  This is used to 'prove' that it is not his fault.  He is only "stupid" but she is the "pyscho whore."

She then calls him "my husband" when she does not know what to call him.  At the time of this posting, she is not done with him.  He is "my" (possessive pronoun) "husband" (title).  Although not a good relationship, he is still hers at the time of this writing.

If you research her accounts you will find, according to Moorer's language that Heather Elvis is a "twisted person."

What has changed in context to cause "pyscho whore girl" to turn into a "twisted" "person" (gender neutral)?

"I could care less seeing that I had a boyfriend of my own for the past couple of years" is a sentence in the negative (care less) making it important.

Note that as a married woman, he "cheated" on her, but she had a boyfriend "of my own" for the past couple of years.

Is this why she called Heather a "whore"?   Is her boyfriend "stupid"?  This is a soft term, and not one of anger.  He "cheated" but he is only "stupid."  She boasts of her own cheating as justification.

 One might wonder if this is a projection of her own hypocrisy and duplicity.

Note "my children" and not "our" children.  This is consistent with "my husband" as when someone says "our" children, there is often a need to 'share' custody (unless one is speaking for both parents).  This "sharing" can be anything from adoption, foster care, or step parenting.  When it is found in marriage, it may indicate that divorce has been spoken about.

Note that she does not affirm that she had an affair:  only that she could "not care less"; which is what her statement is about.  She does not say "I had a boyfriend" on its own terms, but only that she could care "seeing", leaving one to wonder if someone else "sees" it differently.  She may be deceitful about having a boyfriend.

"I will not tolerate anyone hurting my children because my husband banged a hoe..."

a.  Note the inclusion of the pronoun "I" here, making this statement personal.
b.  Note the word "because" explains why she will not allow anyone to hurt her children: as she feels the need to explain why she would, now, be protective.
c.  "my husband" is possessive pronoun.

One might ask if this mother has previously allowed someone to "hurt" her children, unrelated to infidelity.  This "hurt" could be physical or emotional.  This is her reason to protect her children.  What about other incidents in which infidelity was not involved?

"3 times" 

Please note that according to McClish research (and many subsequent confirmations), "three" is called "the liar's number"; that is, a number often found within lies.

Please note that she claimed that her husband cheated on her for 2 months.

It is possible that Sidney Moorer lied to her, minimizing the number of sexual contacts that he engaged in.  Note that the location of sexual contact is given, which may be an attempt to portray the lack of care and lack of forethought by her husband.  This is also likely a lie he told her, one of which she chooses to believe.

"and nothing more" may be entering into the language of Sidney.  Note to Tammy:  you can ask the following questions of your husband;

1.  What does "nothing" look like?
2.  Where did "nothing" take place?
3.  How often did "nothing" happen?

"I could care less what he screwed around with"

Unlike her own "boyfriend", here, Heather elvis is now reduced to "what" instead of "person."  This is a depersonalization of Heather Elvis.  It could be from extreme pain of being humiliated in his cheating, or it could be that she knows something more and has a different need to depersonalize Heather Elvis.  I think it is the former.

Note that this is her second "care less" sentence, in the negative.  This is a very important sentence.  The first one she sought to prove how she could "care less" because she had a boyfriend, which was asserted only weakly, and not reliable.

Here, the "what" is something she cares less over.

Taken together, it is likely that she cares acutely what he did.  This is a subject who is feeling extreme pain and humiliation due to her husband's actions.

"this jerk" is the father of a missing young woman.  This is stronger language than what she used on her cheating husband.

"stalking my family" indicates that Terry Elvis believes that the answer to his daughter's plight rests within Sidney Moorer, and whatever he shared with his wife.

Statement Analysis Conclusion

Tammy Moorer, at the time of this writing, does not show guilty knowledge of what happened to Heather Elvis.

 Her attempt to minimize her own pain is thin.  Her lack of concern for Heather Elvis' plight indicates extreme hurt and she blames Heather rather than her own husband for his infidelity.  She does not make a strong assertion that she has a boyfriend, but rather shows an immature (wife and mother) 'tit for tat' self respect grab, which does not portray her in a positive light.  I doubt her assertion (at the time of the writing only) of having a boyfriend, even though it shows her own moral standard's uneasy ground.

At the time of the writing, she still loves her husband, who has lied to her about the nature of his relationship with Heather Elvis, suggesting it was deeper than Tammy Moorer wishes to have seen.

Tammy Moorer does not assert her husband's innocence, nor even his ignorance, of the disappearance of Heather Elvis.

It is likely that Mrs. Moorer has her doubts.

The desperate father is a "jerk", which is stronger than her husband being "stupid", and she saves the most venom for the younger woman.

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" is evident within her posting.

In spite of her defense of her husband, we may see a change in language, over time, as more details of the affair comes out, and a shifting of blame away from the young victim, and more towards Sidney Moorer.

111 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow, what trashy people !

Anonymous said...

Wow! Excellent article, Peter. You make many points that I had not thought of previously; all excellent ones, I might add. I had initially laid my first blame at Tammys' feet, now I'm not so sure. Looks like I might have been wrong.

marietje said...

Yes, I immediately felt the same way about Tammy. Zero self-worth and self-loathing for participating in "open marriage" with Sydney projected onto Heather.
This is OT but has anyone been following this case out of Texas? Seems her husband is the last one to see her, isn't searching and friends in Colorado are doing the fundraising. Sounds like another Lacy Peterson to me. No one saw her walking in a town the size of San Antonio? No scent when you are abducted by car at your residence and taken to another
location. http://kdvr.com/2014/01/21/denver-woman-disappears-in-texas-after-traveling-the-world/
http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/local-news/denver-woman-disappears-after-around-the-world-trip12514
http://gma.yahoo.com/video/world-traveling-woman-disappears-close-133957814.html.

marietje said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

some of that spew was in retaliation of "searchers" actions and comments, and most important, one threat of kidnapping her kids until she gives heather back.

Anonymous said...

so does she know heather is dead and she wouldnt be able to pay the ransom?

Carnival Barker said...


Her whole statement is a contradiction. She's very clear about being a protective mama bear and no matter what her Prince Charming does her kids are off limits. Okay, that's fair. But then why does she fault and mock Heather Elvis' father for being equally as protective of his child?? If her parental instinct is as strong as she makes it out to be, why does she not empathize with someone who is living Tammy Moorer's worst nightmare ... someone hurting their child??? Instead she belittles and attacks him. I understand her venom toward her husband's paramour; but the bashing of a father desperately searching for his missing daughter makes my alarm go off.

Also, I'm wondering if she is posting this on Facebook is it necessary for her to introduce her husband in her statement, since this was supposed to only been seen by her Facebook friends?

Tania Cadogan said...

Why is it in such cases where the male has an affair, the slighted woman always blames the other woman rather than the fact her male is just as guilty and may well have done the chasing and instigating??

Carnival Barker said...


@Hob,
I've never understood that line of reasoning either. The married one is the one that vowed fidelity; they are the one that has an obligation to uphold.

Also, in this case there was an almost 20-year age difference between Heather Elvis and Sidney Moorer, which, in my opinion, swings the control and maturity pendulum in Moorer's direction. It wasn't a meeting of equals. Young girls are very flattered by the attention of an older man and are easily influenced in situations like these.

Anonymous said...

hob and carn, that is the mentality of people who worship the prison god. has either of them or their parents been in prison? that is the religious teachings they share amongst themselves.

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 3:29 go away.

Sella35 said...

@ marietje said... Link you gave does not work....can you give names of the people involved, I would be interested in reading this story.

~mj said...

I get feeling angry towards "the other woman". In this case Ms. Moorer knew Heather Elvis was aware that Sidney was married, so it makes sense she would be angry with her. What I cannot relate to is having more anger towards the other woman than your own cheating husband.

Even more alarming, however, is the lack of humanity on Ms. Moorer's part. Cheating is not punishable by death. The fact that Ms. Moorer does not feel compassion for Heather's safety and family is disgusting. And frankly, it is scary how popular this attitude is with society.

Anonymous said...

Did you know MJ, many years ago, that adulterous cheating used to be punishable by death in many states? Did you know that it was a spouses legal right and justification for killing the other spouse if they were found to be cheating? In fact, there were many who could have been accused of cheating and whose spouse brought forth 'witnesses' who in fact really weren't cheating but their spouse wanted rid of them. True story.

Did you know that if a wife caught her husband cheating, or if he found another woman he wanted, he could have his wife committed to an insane asylum for the rest of her life just based on his say so that she was crazy? Sure enough. This is one reason the Baker Act was created. Men had to be stopped from doing this to their wives.

Statement Analysis Blog said...

John,

It has to be looked at in context.

If someone writes everyone's name with a capital letter, but suddenly 'downgrades' someone with a lower case, it should be noted. Could it be an error in typing? Sure. So, keep an eye on it. Does the name get repeated, and if so, lower case again? This would be a downgrade.

If everyone is lower case, than an upper case should be noted.

Peter

lane said...

Here's the press release the garden ridge pd put out this evening:

PRESS RELEASE Jan. 25, 14 A multi-agency search was conducted today for Leanne Hecht Bearden. This is the latest in the investigation into the disappearance of Leanne after she went for a walk on Jan. 17th from a relative’s home in Garden Ridge. The search basically covered a 23 square acre area that formed a cone surrounding where she was last seen. The search consisted of foot, canine, horseback, ATV and air elements from many agencies, local, state and federal including military. The search resulted in no signs of Ms. Bearden. As in all investigations, those who last saw the missing person are considered persons of interest. While we continue to follow all leads, an extensive investigation has led us to believe that Mrs. Bearden went for a walk and did not meet with foul play at the family home or in the immediate area. Her husband, Josh, has been cooperative with all investigations and is not a person of interest. Our heart goes out to the Hecht and Bearden families as they search for their loved one. We continue to support them in their efforts and encourage anyone with information to contact Comal County Crime Stoppers or the Garden Ridge Police Department via e-mail police@ci.garden-ridge.tx.us. Any updated information will be posted at www.ci.garden-ridge.tx.us. While law enforcement does not speculate, our concern is that Mrs. Bearden was not familiar with the area, she may have become disoriented or lost. Ms. Bearden is listed as a missing person through every available missing person data base. The Garden Ridge Police Department would like to thank Sheriff Holder, Captain Ward and the Comal County Sheriff’s Office, Comal County Constables, Comal County Emergency Management, Schertz PD, Texas Rangers, Texas Dept. of Public Safety and The Bracken Fire for providing local support. TEXAR (Texas Search and Rescue) CEO, Greg Pyles, provided the organizational skills to mount this massive search. This search was made possible by the efforts of over 145 highly trained search and rescue personnel from over 17 agencies. Chief Donna O’Conner

Read more: http://www.woai.com/pages/michaelboard.html?article=12004840&desktop=true&desktopviewduration=72000#ixzz2rYBBvJ00

John Mc Gowan said...

Thanks Peter.

lane said...

OT
http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-25867695

Mary Konye guilty of acid attack on friend Naomi Oni
23 January 2014 Last updated at 16:46

Konye attacked Ms Oni, an assistant at a Victoria's Secret lingerie shop, because she once called her ugly, the court heard.

The pair, who had been friends since secondary school, fell out in April 2011 when Ms Oni allegedly accused Konye of texting her boyfriend and called her an "ugly monster".

CCTV footage obtained by police showed a figure in a niqab following Ms Oni as she left work at Westfield shopping centre in Stratford at about 23:30 GMT.

Following the attack on 30 December 2012, Konye pretended to give Ms Oni a shoulder to cry on.

marietje said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Maggie said...

I agree--she seems to have no guilty knowledge. But wow, what a trashy lady she is! Just the mere fact of posting all of her trashy business on facebook. And the fact that she has no compassion for Heather being missing. What winners her and her husband are, both cheating and her announcing it on facebook. What a prize her hubby is too! What a disgusting goatee he has. It looks like a broom!

marietje said...

@ Sella 35. Lane has posted a press release in comments. The missing woman is Leanne Hecht Bearden and the husband is Josh Bearden. Try to copy and paste the links.
I find this statement from the husband very suspicious. "She left on her own free will. That is what she did. That is absolutely true, but what happened after she left the house on her own free will I don't know," her husband Josh told reporters. - From ABC 7 News Denver. http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/local-news/denver-woman-disappears-after-around-the-world-trip12514.

Anonymous said...

right maggie, and how does that reflect on who/what heather is? i mean, she was doing him in the back seat of a car.

Maggie said...

I read through quite a bit of Heather's twitter from the link Peter provided. It was difficult to read. This seems to have been a very depressed young woman, very low self-esteem, eating disorder (or previous eating disorder). I wonder about the possibility of her having committed suicide after reading through. This is probably not the case, but Heather Elvis was certainly struggling with some serious emotional difficulties.

Maggie said...

Heather's writings on her twitter account are very off-putting, however, this seems to have been a young woman who was struggling with depression, I hate to use the term but also with "love addiction" and my guess is she was also struggling with anorexia as well as bulimia (this is why her doctor who she references she saw monthly was critical of her losing 5 lbs. as well as there are other indicators of eating disorder (I feel it is anorexia as well as bulimia) within her posts), this type of thing is often deeply ingrained behavior and can cause profound emotional difficulty. So, after reading through, it is clear to me, this was an individual in a very precarious emotional state. She may have even had borderline type personality tendencies, and I just really wonder after reading about the possibility of her having harmed herself in some way.

~mj said...

Yikes! Certainly cruel. ~ I personally feel that cheating is cowardly and is about as low-down as one can go (with the exception of murder, obviously) I am just saddened over the lack of compassion that Ms. Moorer has.

I wouldn't expect her to want to invite Heather Elvis' family over for coffee or for her to be falling over herself in grief for Heather's disappearance, but some compassion would be in order. People having that utter disdain for human life is exactly what is tearing apart our society's foundation and before you know it, we will back in a civilization that you spoke of.

At the very least Ms. Moorer could have held her tongue about her personal feelings about Heather's actions. The old adage, "If you cannot say something nice, do not say anything at all" ~ certainly applies here.

Then to add insult to injury and it speaks volumes as to Ms. Moorer's personality - her wrath is misdirected. Her husband owns that more than Heather does, as Heather did not speak vows of joining lives with Ms. Moorer, Sidney did.

~mj said...

lol! "He looks like a broom" - I am sorry, I know it isn't very nice of us to pick him apart, but I about shot my my beverage through my nose when I read that!

Anonymous said...

to jump to another conclusion: Tammy's statement means Sidney did it because she does not expressly state that she knows he had nothing to do with it. And clearing up that uncertainty -- would be expected if it were possible.

if anybody could vouch for him it would be her.

Sindney didn't hire help either - at least not help to act on their own because if that was his intent he would have do it while he had the alibu of being away on vacation. but he had bassially got back to town just then.

Anonymous said...

"and nothing more"

I think she meant no feelings attached to the sex between her husband and Heather Elvis.
At least it seems that is what her husband told her.


Anonymous said...

Good Lord. You people are a bunch a nuts thinking Tammy should have compassion for Heather! This is the woman who sc'ewed with her husband and you want her to show some silly fake compassion of her husband's ho???! Would YOU? You're crazy!

Statement Analysis Blog said...

Carnival Barker said...

@Hob,
I've never understood that line of reasoning either. The married one is the one that vowed fidelity; they are the one that has an obligation to uphold.

Also, in this case there was an almost 20-year age difference between Heather Elvis and Sidney Moorer, which, in my opinion, swings the control and maturity pendulum in Moorer's direction. It wasn't a meeting of equals. Young girls are very flattered by the attention of an older man and are easily influenced in situations like these.
January 26, 2014 at 3:14 PM


well said.

Anonymous said...

Heather Elvis may have thrown herself at Sydney Moorer, I'm not saying whether she did or she didn't, I wasn't there. I find it hard to believe though, that he didn't make the first move on her.

I can tell you this, and speak with all truthfulness; of the thirteen years I was divorced between the ages of twenty and thirty-three, I had so many married men coming on to me, conning and lying, begging me and practically panting to put the make on me that I lost count. Not once was it ever me going after any of them.

I don't imagine that I was any exception either; I believe that most single/divorced women have to fight these battles against the married men who come after them in any way they can get to them; and believe me, they are many. B'stards.

Tania Cadogan said...

Peter Hyatt said...

Carnival Barker said...

@Hob,
I've never understood that line of reasoning either. The married one is the one that vowed fidelity; they are the one that has an obligation to uphold.

Also, in this case there was an almost 20-year age difference between Heather Elvis and Sidney Moorer, which, in my opinion, swings the control and maturity pendulum in Moorer's direction. It wasn't a meeting of equals. Young girls are very flattered by the attention of an older man and are easily influenced in situations like these.
January 26, 2014 at 3:14 PM


well said.



Given the age difference, in effect a generation i wonder if this was either him having a middleaged fling, proving to himself he could still pull the young girls, she was a sop to his ego.

Was she looking for a 'father' figure, someone whop could provide what she wanted unlike men of her own age.

He had experience, he knew where he was going with his life, she also reinforced her ego in that she could have any man she wanted regardless of his marital status.

Was this a case of matching egos, each fulfilling what their ego demanded, was she looking for a replacement for her father, a man who made no rules, made few demands of her. ( what was her relationship like with her father? was it the same as we are seeing in her father's concern for her safety and well being?

A 20 yr age difference , is unusual, it is what i would expect to see if the man ifhaving a midlife crisi, what did he offer that someone nearer her own age didn't? did she know he was married if so what did he tell her about the marriage, if he didn't did she ask him outright?

What is clear is there is information we are not being told. The cuckolded woman is hurting and it shows in her words. Who put forth the idea of an open marriage and what were the rules (There will also be rules of some kind) does she seriouslyhave her own lover or is she throwing it out that she is still desirable despite her husban boinking someone 20 yrs younger than himself. How old is her boyfriend?

The wife is raging because she was usurped by a younger woman, i expect demeaning comments about her husband to come out as she seeks to reassure herself she is young enough to attract'boys', they would provide everything he didn't in the bedroom. he in return will insult her looks, her age etc, it will descend into name calling and insults whilst forgetting the victim.

demeaning of the victim is unexpected in most missing person cases, this case though is different in that it is expected as it is in any case where one partner has an affair. I will be interested to see who says what in this tit for tat he said she said case when retribution and revenge take over.

Maggie said...

I agree with Peter--Sydney Moorer is 20 yrs older than Heather and therefore he was the one in control. I don't know who went after who, but he was the one controlling the situation. Heather's twitter writings strike me as coming from someone who was actually quite emotionally immature for her age also and someone who was also quite troubled.
I also agree with Peter when he suspects that Tammy Moorer did not actually have a boyfriend "of her own" for the past couple years. It is in the way the sentence is written. I think she's trying to save face, and she probably is in very severe pain. But her "throwing it all out there" on facebook and not showing any compassion for Heather really does point to someone of low intelligence as well as someone who is pretty mean-spirited.
After reading Heather's twitter, I feel that she had a very troubled relationship with one of her parents (or both). This is someone with low self-esteem, poor body image, and trying to fill a "love void".
I am also wondering, what did Heather mean when she wrote on Twitter "Like mother, like daughter Literally".???

Maggie said...

One other thing I was wondering about Heather's twitter posts: I noticed she writes 2 different times (separated by months I believe) about herself falling down stairs.
The most recent post pertaining to this, she had written something to the effect of 'I fell down the stairs at work like a little bitch'. Reading down further into the past, she writes again about falling down stairs (and does specify where this occurs) saying that she falls down stairs once or twice a month (I believe, going on memory).
I thought this was very strange. Why would someone be falling down stairs once or twice a month?

Anonymous said...

Their faces have to be photoshopped? They are smoothed-out, no wrinkles or a blemish to be seen. It's freaky!

Unknown said...

Good call Anon 12:11, lol. People who use photo enhancers crack me up.

Gee they look totally natural right...with their gleaming alien blue eyes, and chalk white plastic looking skin. Clearly they are the two only people in the world who's faces have never seen the sun, had a zit, or even a freckle or mole!

Anonymous said...

Leanne Bearden's husband said this in an article on ABC News. Do you think he doesn't expect to "ever" find her "in there" because he knows she's dead? He won't stop looking for her, without the expected result of "until I bring you home"? Quote below:

I read the abc article that had quotes from Leanne bearden's husband. Could you please do an analysis of the quotes? I hope he gives a longer statement sometime soon to analyze this quote stuck out to me

"If somebody has you just hang in there," he said. "We're going to keep looking for you. We're never ever going to stop looking for you.

Anonymous said...

Geez, I just don't get it how some of you seem to think that Tammy owes Heather all this respect, consideration and compassion. Jeezyl Pete, whether dead or alive, THIS is the other woman who was having sex with her HUSBAND! This other woman was a direct intrusion and conflict to Tammys' marriage, their home life stability AND to their children.

Compassion? You all act like this wife owes Heather something, when it is the other way around IMO.

Maggie said...

Anon @ 1:40--Heather is 20 years younger than Sidney! What a loser Sidney is--he couldn't find someone closer to his own age and has to take advantage of someone's inexperience and naivety about life. Obviously, he is no prize, not worth his wife's humiliating herself on facebook by describing their fake "open marriage', and telling hundreds of facebook friends how many times her husband "banged" her, all for the "love" of this dirtbag. For real? People actually post that kind of stuff thinking oh this will clear things up, this will make us look like a happy couple?!?! It actually makes me sick and I feel bad for Heather. Someone that age does not even understand the commitment behind marriage as in most cases they have never been married, so it is more of an abstract concept that he is a married man. But then again, who knows if he even told her he was married? A lot of men do lie about that! Either way, he is a dirtbag, his wife can look forward to a miserable life if she stays with him, and he needs a haircut, it looks like he needs a shampoo too or maybe the grease keeps his hair in place??? I love how he has his greasy hair combed behind his ears--it really is a lovely selfie they took! Just charming!

Unknown said...

Anon 1:40,

Why are you saying that Heather was an intrusion and conflict to Tammy's marriage, when she claims to have had a long-term boyfriend, and a 'non-traditional' open marriage? Why would only her husband's sexual contact with someone else be regarded as 'cheating'. Isn't the whole point of an open marriage that they have additional partners, therefore making the idea of cheating null?

Tammy calls Heather a 'ho', but Heather was a young single woman with no obligation to anyone. According to Tammy she, AND her husband were both engaging in sex or relationships outside of their marriage. Someone should introduce TM to the concept of hypocrisy. As someone else pointed out, TM is furious that she CLAIMS her kids were threatened, but she has no compassion for the father or family of Heather who are going on MONTHS of worrying and searching for her.

As a human being, and a mother, TM absolutely SHOULD have compassion for Heather, and her family's plight. The fact that she doesn't suggests that she basically feels Heather deserves whatever happened to her. Therefore, since she feels Heather 'deserved it', she may be the one who committed the act of vengance against her.

Basically by her callous attitude, TM reveals she has a motive...her blind, displaced rage at Heather is so intense that it even carries over to her innocent family members, who are desperate to find her.

Maggie said...

This has nothing to do with statement analysis (sorry), but Tammy has very cold, malevolent looking eyes. I wonder if she could have harmed Heather?
She is embracing her greaseball husband like she is "proud" he is hers.
I don't know--not a good combo considering Heather is missing.

Maggie said...

From Tammy's FB:

"Well Sydney cheated on me in the months of Sep/Oct with a psycho whore who has since went missing..."

I am wondering about her use of the word "since" and the fact that this word "since" is used not only after the time frame of Sep/Oct but also after the description of the fact that Sydney cheated with a "psycho whore". The word "since" has different meanings, and one of them is "because". An example would be "Since I don't like coffee, I am ordering tea." What I am wondering about is if her use of the term and any perhaps unconscious associations she might have had between the word "since" and one of it's meaning which is "because".

Because if you scramble the sentence around and replace the word "since" with the word "because" it would say "A psycho whore went missing (because) Sydney cheated on me in the months of Sep/Oct.

Floridamomma said...

^^interesting.

~mj said...

Anyone who feels that Ms. Moorer should not have compassion for Heather's physical safety or her family is part of the problem and not part of the solution as to what is happening to our degrading society.

As mentioned previous, no one is expecting Ms. Moorer to have compassion and write up sympathy cards for the Elvis family or trek through the woods searching herself for Heather. In this case compassion would be the simple act of humanity that would prevent her from calling Heather a host of degrading names and speaking of her disappearance as an inconvenience to her own life. THAT sort of compassion is what society is missing in far too many cases these days. And that is sad.

Anonymous said...

Simple answer to your questions and many defensive comments that demean the holy AND legal union of matrimony, Maggie & Jen Ow:

BECAUSE THEY ARE STILL LEGALLY MARRIED TO EACH OTHER. THEY ARE A LEGALLY WEDDED COUPLE. She belongs to HIM and he belongs to HER. There has been no divorce.

Then there are the church vows: "Let none put asunder." They shall became as one. In the eyes of God and Divorce Court Laws between a man and a woman, is there really such a thing as an open marriage? I don't think so. Where's it written?

Sydney committed adultery against his wife and against his marriage vows, and Heather was a partaker in adultery with him. Why would Tammy owe either of them any consideration or compassion when they committed adultery against her and the marriage?

No, I would NOT divorce Sydney for cheating with Heather or anyone else. There are three children in this marriage. Why should Tammy and the children pay for what Sydney and Heather did, hurting the kids and breaking up their home forever? I sure wouldn't. I would simply take control of the money, (all of it) keep my family together, clip his wings and move on.


Anonymous said...

MJ, apparently you don't have much respect for the holy bonds of matrimony either. Sad, sad....

~mj said...

anon @ 6:57 - I have a lot of respect "for the holy bonds of matrimony" - I have respect for life, humanity, marriage and I have many other values. Your assumption falls flat, the topic I was speaking to and the topic that keeps popping up is whether Ms. Moorer should have a degree of compassion for the Elvis family and Heather's safety. Had the subject been respect for the marriage union, I would have spoke on my support of said respect.

Maggie said...

Anon @ 6:54--You would stay married to him? Really? Cause if it was me, I'd kick his greaseball ass to the curb!
The guy is scum. Do you not get that? You talk about the sanctity of marriage. Do you not understand that you cannot have a sanctified marriage with a dirtball? This guy didnt even go for a woman his age. Because he's not a real man. He's a loser. I wouldnt bother "clipping his wings". I would focus in on clipping his greasy hair and shaving off his goatee--the thing looks like a broom. And then I'd tell his creepy ass to get lost and find someone else to have this wonderful, sanctified marriage you speak of. The guy looks like he has fleas.

Unknown said...

Anon 6:54-

The GLARING point that you seem to be missing is the fact that Tammy Moorer also commited 'adultery' according to her statement. If she does not respect her own marriage, then why would she expect Heather, her husband, or anyone else to?

Tammy is the one who called their marriage non-traditional and open...very contradictory to the statement she made about Sidney 'cheating on her'. I don't care how she defines her marriage, legally or otherwise. The fact is that SHE claims to have "had a boyfriend of her own for the past few years", so all this harping on the sanctity of her marriage being violated is a joke.

I see her comments as alibi building. As in, 'I have no reason to be involved with Heather's disappearance, I didn't even care about him cheating with her, because I have my own boyfriend'.

PS- I find it interesting that you said, "No, I would NOT divorce Sydney for cheating with Heather or anyone else".

Nobody brought up divorce, and you use the pronoun 'I', as if YOU are actually married to Sidney. You also say there are 3 children in 'THIS' marriage, further owning the marriage.

Are you Tammy Moorer?

Anonymous said...

There is post from last October TCM telling she keeps her hubby on short leash. This is a response to some other woman writing in FB about spouse cheating.

So, in OCT she tells she keeps him in short leash and after HE case, in Jan 2014, she has a open relatonship, BUT HE is still a whore? I definatel looks lke someone is trying hard to correct thigns earlier said.

Anonymous said...

I believe she is guilty . She is covering up what seems like innocence of her knowledge. She has lied about incidences containing her violence against heather. I 99.9% believe that Tammy knows something. Maybe it was her actions alone. Sidney is involved but may have been forced to do something to heather by his wife. Also William caisson , father of Tammy, seems guilty. The 3 of them all know something.

Maggie said...

Jen--I noticed this same exact thing. I think the commenter may be Tammy. I think it would be almost impossible for someone who wasnt Tammy to say "this" marriage.

Maggie said...

The thing that stopped me from pointing it out is that I noticed she misspelled "Sidney" as "Sydney" in the same way I had. I figured if it was her husband she wouldnt misspell his name. I think it is Tammy though and she is misspelling the name on purpose.

Anonymous said...

I say the same thing to the above

Maggie said...

Anon @ 8:39--What you wrote is interesting as well as disturbing, and I agree. Tammy knows something, her flea-ridden husband knows something, Heather's father knows something, and I will add to that that Heather's sister knows something (her responses on a video interview I watched were very rehearsed sounding, disingenuous, and I didnt sense any sorrowful emotion.).

Anonymous said...

When I first heard about this case- and the altercation between Heather and Tammy my first instinct was that Tammy was one to look at closely.
Many scenerios could play out- she could have made her husband do it. She could have done it. Or maybe he did it and she knows but she'll cover for him.. (many reasons for that could be plausible.)

I will say this. A woman has a lot to lose to her husband's affair partner. Be it her marriage, stability (financial and otherwise), a home, shared custody of children in question..

I'm embarassed to say it. I stayed with my husband. I took one look at the woman he cheated with-- losing custody of her own children and doing meth the night he met her.. I wasn't about to share custody and raising rights with her if I left him and he stayed with her. My kids deserve better.
So I stayed. And he chose me I guess. Or maybe I made him choose me in my bitterness and anger and the way I guilted him? He deserved the guilt because our kids are worth more than that kind of hell Either way, I can see how people blame the other woman. She still pursued him after knowing about me. Knowing he was staying with me and had no intentions to leave. Fortunately she got bored eventually and moved on. Though I really blame him for his own actions- it was hard not to hate and blame her too.

My point being. Any amount of mental instability mixed in with all of that- and you end up with cases like these.
This post of Tammy's- reeks of instability.

Anonymous said...

I don't blame Tammy for feeling like she did. Her husband shouldn't of had relations with this woman nor should this woman of had interest in him. Her portrayal as an innocent little girl is BS. She used drugs, pursued married men and who knows what else she got herself into. I know the father knows there's more to this story but keeps accusing the same people. The people who had financial problems were the Elvis family. They have been sued many times for medical debt. Whats up with the fathers criminal record? Sure, take the heat off yourself by blaming others. Someone messed with the wrong kind of people involved in drugs or there is a serial murderer. Everything is speculation and everyone is using emotion to make decisions. Nothing proves guilt thus far and if youre so sure youre right, share FACTS, not speculation. Although, Mr Elvis civil suits as well as criminal behavior is live and well on the Horry County website. Cant deny fact.

Anonymous said...

Tammy Moorer's FB post has white trash written all over it. As a mother she should feel compassion for the Elvis family but she doesn't which leaves me questioning her part in Heathers disappearance. So much vengeance for Heather, yet her husband is only "stupid", really? I can't imagine the three children feeling secure living under that roof. What a volatile situation with a very out of control woman. Very insecure too. I highly doubt she has a boyfriend...

Anonymous said...

I am upset when I see the comments go from intellectually stimulating to name calling. I think most people who read this blog enjoy learning about statement analysis and find it empowering that there is a way to understand or analyze what people say. It makes life easier to understand and less like the Wild West. I think it would help if everyone remembered why they read the blog and to stick to the analysis instead of theories that the analysis doesn't really support. I think statement analysis would be enriching to a lot lf people but making wild guesses after a very level headed analysis paints statement analysis with an ugly brush and does a disservice to the method.

Anonymous said...

Anon@ 1:54 AM. Look at Clarence Caison on Horry County's website (conspiracy to commit kidnapping, any relation?)...look at William F. Caison and Sidney Moorer (assault and battery, really?). What a bunch of low life rednecks. Medical collections isn't all that uncommon, a young woman that goes missing after contact with a married man certainly is. A 41 year old woman on FB dishing the dirt when a young woman is missing says more about her lack of character. No doubt the police are looking suspiciously at the Moorer's, so is everyone else. Heather turned 20 not long ago, Sidney is about twice her age. What a dangerous brood of heathens. When Disney gets wind of this I doubt Mrs. Moorer will be a vacation specialist, her FB interaction has shown her true colors and it's not pretty. I can't imagine Palmetto Maintenance is very busy since the police report surfaced. I guess it's a good thing the Moorer's live on daddy Caison's property so they're not saddled with a mortgage (yes, check Horry County Register of Deeds) for the truth, it's right there in black and white. Tax records are available also for more factual proof. When you tell one lie you have to tell another one to cover it up, or delete your FB posts. I just love screen shots, they last long after posts are deleted.....

Anonymous said...

Regarding the "therefore making Sidney stupid" comment: This rant of hers was actually a comment she made to a post she made. She had posted a photo of a beautiful home. A friend commented on it. She responded that she and her "stupid husband" had built that home (not sure if that is true or not). The friend then, if I remember right, asked why she was referring to her husband as stupid. Then, she answered with the rant you have posted, explaining why she was calling him stupid. This was not a stand alone post, or randomly posted. It was an answer to a question. The "stupid" comment didn't have anything to do with TE. Her "Well" was because she was answering her friend's question.

Anonymous said...

@Hobnob at 10:59

"Given the age difference, in effect a generation i wonder if this was either him having a middleaged fling, proving to himself he could still pull the young girls, she was a sop to his ego."

I'm a female in my early forties and divorced. I can't tell you how many men I've met/gone out with in the last few years (since the divorce) who are older than me and have become VERY accustomed to dating women in their early and mid twenties. One was about 45 when he became involved with a 19 year old girl and dated her fir three years! She was his employee. Another was just such a child himself he could really only related to girls that age. But, all of them had what you just said in common....it fed their egos. Made them feel like they still "had it", even if most of the time they were shelling out tons of money to get the girls out of debt, buy them presents to keep them interested, etc. I'm not saying all relationships with a huge age difference are this way, but from what I've observed it even becomes like an entitlement, almost an "addiction." They're incapable of real relationships with women their own age once they've discovered they can get the young hot things.

Anonymous said...

To Jen OW and the others who suspect that I am Tammy? OMG! I thought you all could analyze posters better than this miscalculation. I am the Anon who posted those posts showing a little respect for Tammys' marriage vows and her right to disdain the other adulterous woman should she so chose too; and I am NOT Tammy. It is irrelevant to me how Sydney spells his name, whether it is properly spelled Sidney or Sydney. I don't give a hoot.

I don't know the woman Tammy and frankly, don't care too. These people aren't in my league, BUT there is a marriage involved here that IS before the eyes of God, that DOES state, "through sickness and through health, through the good times and the bad times, 'til death do us part". There are three innocent children these two have brought into the world who deserve the protection of their parents no matter WHAT each partner has done outside the marriage.

I don't care if Tammy has made a fool out of herself in speaking out crudely and publically the way she has done, even though I would not have said the things she has said; right or wrongly, it is HER marriage and this is HER husband.

Heather is NOT her husband or 'sister-wife' nor is she in any way related to Heather. Heather is a woman who partook of adultery with Tammys' husband and that is ALL she is to Tammy. She owes Heather no loyalty of any kind whatsoever for the adulterous thing she has done in HER marriage with HER husband. The subject is NOT whether or not Tammy has cheated; the subject is Heather and Tammys' husband and Tammys' marriage, which is still very much in force before the eyes of God and man.

Yes, the subject of divorce did come up by another poster earlier on, ranting about how she would divorce 'Sidney' and that is why I said I would NOT divorce him. Does he beat her and the children and won't work? Is he a drunk blowing the money and they are going hungry? Has he kept them homeless? Does he cavort sexually with other men?

YOU don't realize it, but YOU are the one holding the ace card! YOU are the WIFE. You are so overshadowed by your fleeting 'it hurts me in my gut' pride, that you would destroy your home and your childrens' life for the rest of their lives due to your impulsive 'he-hurt-me' actions?

Some would divorce him for acts of adultery with a woman, when this is so easy to nip in the bud and keep your family together, PLUS wind up with a faithful husband who loves you? Believe me, he would never lie too or cheat on you again once YOU take control of the money and KEEP it. But you would toss everything aside, particularly your innocent CHILDREN, because your husband cheated on you?

Then you have a lose hinge or two; you, who would allow yourself and YOUR children to pay for what THEY did; you, who would put your children through all the suffering of having no father, of him marrying some floozy and watching THEM have a home while THEY have fun visitation rights, and your children has NO home and you struggle financially for the rest of your sorry life while hubby enjoys the good life?

You would allow your children to watch you belly up to the bar with other men and 'sleep-overs' around your innocent children, while you neglect them for your night life and they cry themselves to sleep, and while you eventually marry them a step-daddy who just might abuse them; but YOU would risk all this because of your short-lived shame due to your husband cheating on you with a tramp who has NO rights in your life? No offense meant, but you need your head examined.

Anonymous said...

Anon at 7:51, you're pretty judgmental of women divorcing men who cheat. I don't disagree with some of what you've said, but you seem to thing that EITHER a woman stays with her adulterous husband OR she subjects her children to a life of miserable and SURE abuse at the hands of an evil step father and FLOOZY step mother. Some step parents are actually good people; you know this, right??

I'm not a step parent, but my kids have a step mother who loves them. I also, as a single mother have never "bellied up to a bar" or paraded men in and out of my house. My kids have never once witness a sleepover like what you describe. Some of us divorced parents actually have brains. College degrees and self respect, too!

Carnival Barker said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Carnival Barker said...


@Peter, thank you so much for the compliment! I feel like I've been annointed by the King!

@Maggie, your posts have all made me laugh. The Maggie Imposter may steal your name, but your wit and colorful commentary are all your own.

Maggie said...

Carnival Baker--Your compliment brought a smile to my face--Thank you! :)

Anonymous said...

Well. Good for you, Anon @ 8:04, but there certainly aren't many of them out there like you who actually wind up with the good luck you've had.

Of course, there are some good step-parents, I never said there wasn't, but good luck finding one who won't cheat on you just like your hubby did, or worse; or won't slap you and your kids around, if not do other abuses to your kids that you never dreamed he would do, and yada yada yada.

Then there's the matter of money (or lack of) that you bring into the marriage when your kids have to be supported and a home provided for by this new man; PLUS the most often unpleasant environment of his kids, my kids, our kids and the never ending conflicts and money problems.

You may go through hundreds before you find one good peach among all the rotten ones on the tree, and STILL you are taking a huge risk that it may not turn out any better than what you had, possibly worse; all this for a 'hope and a dream' of a man who is not your childrens' father, whom you may never find; when you have already been through every struggle there is and the tortures of the damned with your childrens' stupid father (yes, stupid); but now you could make it if you would take control of the situation AND WOULD if you allowed yourself too. From all I've seen in my vast experiences and knowledge, the cons far outweigh the pros.

But, if you were wiser and smarter, then God bless you. Most women (AND men) aren't.

Anonymous said...

I think the context of this posting is important to note in your analysis. It was posted in the comments of her cover photo, which was of their house. Someone complimented it and she answered, "Thanks, my stupid husband built it," and that person inquired further (possibly with a 'lol')... It may only affect the fact that she starts the post with "well," but I think it's significant that this was NOT a public wall posting as frequently implied, though naturally she did set up her own reasoning for it by calling him stupid in the other comment.

Anonymous said...

Hard to read this article when I have to look at two of the most ugly people I have ever seen..bleached teeth,and porky the pig wife is to much,ugh!!! I think I may have just vomited a little bit.

Anonymous said...

To anon at 9:07:

"when you have already been through every struggle there is and the tortures of the damned with your childrens' stupid father (yes, stupid); but now you could make it if you would take control of the situation AND WOULD if you allowed yourself too. "

^^Can't for the life of me figure out what you're trying to say here. Could you clarify?

I did not put this in my original posting to you since I felt it would seem like a contradiction of myself and the point I was trying to make, but the part I agree with you the most is making a hasty decision for yourself (i.e. myself, my pain, my peace) and not taking enough into account how it affects the kids. My ex husband was not a serial cheater, although he did have a one night stand. I was angry, bitter, resentful, and I divorced him. It took me years to forgive him, long after the divorce. He practically immediately remarried a woman the kids love and she treats them great. However, we are now reconciling, and it's not because their marriage is troubled or they fight, or she's bad to the kids. It's because we realized how much we screwed up and how much in love with each other we still are. It's a complicated situation, but I'm only saying this to say that the part you wrote about divorcing out of hurt, in haste, etc., was right on. I made that mistake and didn't own my part in the marital troubles. We've both grown so much in the last few years and are looking forward to our next marriage honoring God and each other.

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 9:07, I've very happy for you that both you and your husband have realized the past tormenting mistake you made in heartbroken haste. What happened to you and so many others I've known is SO understandable;

My first marriage really wasn't worth salvaging in so many other dreadful ways that had nothing to do with adultery, and after a number of years of being 'happily' divorced, and by the time I reached my second marriage and had seen and experienced just about every kind of disgusting situation I think there is out there with these men (AND women of lose morals); that is the reason I can speak so affirmatively now of what I know to be a huge mistake of making all the many struggles you wouldn't have had to make, or of dragging your children through divorce and many sad and lonely days & nights, and how I know that it tears up ones children for years to come; when we ought to be honoring those vows that were taken before God FIRST, AND putting those innocent children we brought into this world ahead of ourselves for their entire future and not our own devastating pain which we CAN overcome and DOES pass if we will only allow it too.

It was in my second marriage that I vowed never to allow myself to pay for what someone else did to ME and cause me to destroy my childrens' lives for the quickly fleeting mistake of adultery; knowing there are much worse things that can happen in a marriage than adultery.

By dang, he certainly DID give me every reason to suspect that he had been cheating on me, (and to this day I still think he did) and I most assuredly DID nip it in the bud AND took control. Real quick. After that he couldn't have played around had he wanted too. It takes money to play and he didn't have any.

I am sorry if I confused you, my entire post wasn't in response to yours; I was speaking in generalities in most of that post. God bless you in everything you do in trying now to salvage your former marriage as I'm sure He will. I know He will.... You'll see, you'll be SO glad you did. xx00...

Anonymous said...

Sorry, the above post was meant in response to Anon @ 11:ll.

Unknown said...

Anon-

I gave my reasons for believing you are Tammy Moorer. You used the personal 'I', and the close 'this' when speaking of whether YOU would divorce Sidney. If you are not Tammy, then you are overly internalizing this topic, and projecting YOUR feelings about marriage and infidelity on a situation where they don't apply. NOBODY involved was honoring the 'sacred bonds of marriage'.

Tammy's venom toward Heather IS telling, when she claims to have been engaging in the same behavior. Hello kettle, my name is pot, your black.

As far as your multiple posts attacking woman who divorce cheating men, what you fail to acknowledge is that the 'original' husband/father is clearly NOT an ideal man to raise children with either. A man who would cheat has a character flaw that will permeate every aspect of his life. If he is capable of cheating, putting his family's stability and well-being in jeopardy...then he is selfish, impulsive, immature, and unable to place the needs of his own children above his wants and desires. Does that sound like a good husband, father and role model?

Once the trust is gone, it's over...so why torture everyone (kids included) just to prove you can keep him? (What sleazy cheat wouldn't stay at home and have his wife keep being his babysitter, chef, and full time maid, while he goes about his future cheating more carefully?) If he got away with it once, and kept his family, why wouldn't he do it again?

FYI-If I caught my husband cheating, I wouldn't worry for one second about where I would be living. I'd toss his cheating butt out in the snow, and he would be shuffling over ice in his boxers, bathrobe and slippers like a vagrant, and eating out of a dumpster tonight, lol

Anonymous said...

My point Anon, @11:11, was, when the wife who has been cheated on realizes, #1) that her husband is eternally grateful that she just let him stay in his home and with his kids, and; 2) when the wife takes over control of the money, which she definitely should do once he has lied/cheated on her; THEN she can properly budget the family income and there will be no more cheating because he will be broke and can no longer afford to cheat. It takes money to cheat.

It seems 'hardened' on the surface when a wife has to do this, but this is the way it has to be if you are ever going to maintain any stability and peace of mind; all brought on himself BY HIMSELF. Then when you treat him right about the money YOU are managing and don't make him beg for a little spending money here and there, which he now has no control over; he will love and appreciate you all the more for it. It sure worked for me.

You understand the point of taking money control away from your husband after knowing that you cannot trust him no matter how many 'he meant it at the time' promises he makes?

Anonymous said...

Jen, I get the picture. I just hope you never find that your hubby has cheated on you; you might learn then that your children and THEIR life means more to you than you mean to yourself.

No pun intended, and I DO mean this; but you remind me of those women who go around bragging that 'my husband would never cheat on me' when you don't have x-ray eyes in the back of your head, you're not with him every second of every day and night, and you don't have the slightest idea what he may be doing at this very minute unless he's right there in your face right now, or yesterday afternoon when your back was turned for a few hours, or last week or last year. You just 'think' you know.

I got a laugh out of your last paragraph. I did. I can just see this scenario actually happening... Best of luck! You might find you need it one of these days. Hope not.

Anonymous said...

To Anon at 1:58.

Re: the money and control of it.

I see what you are saying, although I don't think that can be a blanket statement for all cheating. There was virtually no money involved in what he did. Unless you count internet access we both split the price of and the gas money his company provided in him getting to the meet up location (and I have zero control over that since I don't work for that company). In a lot of circumstances where people are meeting at hotels, for drinks, etc., yes, I can see that would be helpful. Just not all. And there's still the element of distrust. I don't really think a marriage can be completely healthy without trust. I know it sounds crazy to some who say, "once a cheater always a cheater" and "one time, and he'd be out the door!" (I know you're not like that), but I trust him 200% now. He's a completely changed man with a relationship with God now that he did not have before, and I am too. (Not a man lol). We were together for a long time before it all hit the fan, and if I have any reason to take control of the money it's because of other financial decisions he's made I don't agree with that have nothing to do with cheating, and the fact I have family money (so I will be insisting on more control than last time). I think FULL TRANSPARENCY is a good thing, meaning access to cell phones, internet history, etc. Email...I don't know. I would not want him to read some emails between my sister, girlfriends and I. Point is, every relationship is different. What's a temptation in your marriage (money?) wouldn't be in mine (technology). Just gotta be willing to work with each other to build trust. (A lot of our issues had to do with general respect and emotional abuse as well, not just the one time infidelity).

To those who say they'd NEVER let a cheater back in the house....you don't know until it happens. I've done a lot of things in my life I swore I'd never do. When you have kids in the mix, and have a very repentant partner, the game changes. For the better :).

Sorry to be hijacking this post, everyone.

Anonymous said...

BTW Jen; I saw all the reasons you and a few others gave for believing I am Tammy Moorer. Wrong. That's your blind misconception AND theirs.

How many times do I have to say that some people look to find something wrong that they already believed in the first place, will make false accusations based on their speculations and misconceptions, when they are dead wrong yet keep on digging trying to prove their misconceptions? So there you have it.

I am NOT Tammy Moorer, don't know the woman and don't want too. However, I DO have empathy for others and it is not so difficult for me to put myself in their unfortunate position. Have you ever tried it? Maybe you should.

Anonymous said...

To Anon @ 1:58; such a lovely post and taken with a lot of admiration on my part. You're right, not every little situation can be exactly the same for everyone elses marriage; you just have to work out what works best for YOU and avoid all the hassles wherever you can.

For beginners, I don't even believe in having to work at a marriage so hard. If you have to "work" at it, and beat your head a against a brick wall, to me, it's not worth having. I don't even want a relationship with anyone that's so much damned hard work. Forget THAT!~ Marriage is supposed to be happy, carefree and fun being together.

I don't believe in sharing every little thought and thing you do either. Would I ever share my password, or hassle over a joint checking account where one doesn't know what the other one is doing half the time? Are you kidding? Ain't no way.

So there you have more of my beliefs on what actually works out (for ME) and it AIN'T a lot of unnecessary struggles, beginning with setting up some reasonable guidelines and taking control of your own life and keeping that control.

Don't ever think you can send a man mixed signals and think you can change horses in the middle of the stream. You can't. A woman has to lay the groundwork and stick with it. It certainly has worked for me. Have a good day...

Anonymous said...

Jeeez... I goofed again. The above post is meant for Anon @ 2:15. Sorry.

Unknown said...

Anon2:23

I see irony is your specialty. Thanks for the laugh!

While we are BTW-ing,

I am confused by your contradiction of your earlier comments.

When Heather and Sidney, two people you don't even know engage in an affair it is wrong, and deserving of no compassion toward either party involved. You repeatedly argued this point.

But, when speaking of your personal experience, it's no biggie. There are far worse things than a fleeting act of adultery. You won't let anyone steal your sunshine?

Two quotes from you:

"BECAUSE THEY ARE STILL LEGALLY MARRIED TO EACH OTHER. THEY ARE A LEGALLY WEDDED COUPLE. She belongs to HIM and he belongs to HER. There has been no divorce. Then there are the church vows: "Let none put asunder." They shall became as one. In the eyes of God and Divorce Court Laws between a man and a woman, is there really such a thing as an open marriage? I don't think so. Where's it written? Sydney committed adultery against his wife and against his marriage vows, and Heather was a partaker in adultery with him. Why would Tammy owe either of them any consideration or compassion when they committed adultery against her and the marriage?"

And then:

"It was in my second marriage that I vowed never to allow myself to pay for what someone else did to ME and cause me to destroy my childrens' lives for the QUICKLY FLEETING MISTAKE OF ADULTERY; knowing THERE ARE MUCH WORSE THINGS THAT CAN HAPPEN IN A MARRIAGE THAN ADULTERY."

So, is adultery a horrible thing, leaving the wife in this case justly devoid of any human compassion...OR, not that big of a deal, certainly not the worst thing that can happen in a marriage?

As I said before, your language reveals that you are projecting YOUR personal issues with marriage and fidelity onto this situation.

Maggie said...

My opinion is this: If someone wants to work it out with a cheating husband, then that is fine. With the Sidney situation, it is not fine. A 40 year old who cheats with a 20 year old--this is a different thing in my opinion than someone cheating with someone their own age or closer to their own age. This guy's a low life, Tammy knows it, and she will never forgive him or forget about it (in my opinion).
Personally, I will not lie. I have put up with a lot from certain guys I've been with, BUT CHEATING IS NOT ONE OF THEM. I am way too vain to deal with that. I need a guy who is dedicated to me and thinks I'm the best thing since sliced bread. I actually would not and have not tolerated behavior like checking out another woman (blatantly) or verbally complimenting ("she's hot!") (you know how certain scumballs will do that to try to make you jealous when they are upset with you). Oh no. That is when I end the relationship. I am a good-looking woman, as all of us women are, my attitude is: I look pretty damn good, I look good enough for you to only eyes for me. If you think she's hot, then by all means, go be with her! I don't do jealousy or competition type stuff. I've kept myself looking good; my attitude is you either like what you're looking at here or by all means, if you like how someone else looks better, then please go be with them! So you see, I would not marry a man who would cheat. I have been with a man for 15 years who only has eyes for me, he is loyal. As I said, you weed through the ones who are not loyal, the second they try to make you jealous, or feel like they want you to compete--oh no, hell no, I don't compete! This is a vanity and pride thing. I have a very high opinion of myself, so I don't compete with anyone. It's as simple as that. All of us women should feel that way about ourselves. Men do the cheating bullshit mainly as a power and control thing, or extreme immaturity and who the hell would want to deal with that. Cheating is one thing I have never put up with, even someone who seemed capable of it, I just simply ended the relationship immediately. It is actually much more offensive when a man cheats for a variety of reasons. Women usually do it because they are lacking something very important emotionally in the relationship. With men--no that is not why they do it.

Maggie said...

I am sorry if my post sounds arrogant. But once you hit 35, 40 years old, as a woman, you've paid your dues in life. I've paid my dues in life, I know who I am, and I know, if I am offering up a gourmet meal, why would someone go eat at McDonald's??? Someone that stupid would not be welcome in my presence. Simple as that.!!

Maggie said...

My advice to the lady who has taken control of the money and all that: I get what you're saying, and if it works for you that's good. There is a better way though. Think of yourself as a queen. Meaning--Carry yourself in a regal way. Make sure you are happy with your clothes, make-up, hair, treat yourself to whatever you would like in these things. If your husband does something you dont like that makes you feel insecure he could be straying, dismiss him from your court. Meaning--ignore him, spend money on yourself, buy some more clothes, go out with friends--make him inconsequential. Men are privilaged to be with us women. You have reversed things in your mind where you feel you are privilaged to be with him. This is not the case. He should be worshipping you as a woman on some level. You need to fall in love with yourself first. Realize your power as a woman. He is privilaged to be with you!!! You dont need to control his money. You need to recognize YOU ARE QUEEN!!! One of 2 things will happen when you fully realize this 1) your husband will begin worshipping you and serving you OR 2) he will go away and you will promptly (not with all this toil you speak of) attract someone WAY better into your life!

Anonymous said...

OMG Maggie, you are so far off the beaten path it's not even funny. Like most women, you have badly deceived yourself. And you SURE don't know anything about me and MY lifestyle! Oh God, how pathetic and ludicrous. YOU, think of yourself as the Queen? Honey, you've been being used by a man with no commitment for the last fifteen years. This, according to your own words?

This is so dumb I don't even want to discuss it any further. Is he keeping you up financially? Has he provided a financial plan of security for you in your declining years, that he cannot snatch away from you (should he stumble upon a younger skirt he wants to chase)? If no to these questions, then you are dumber than a rock. But PLEASE, don't answer that. I don't care one way or the other, I was merely making a point.

Jen Ow. NO; cheating is NOT the worst thing that can happen in a marriage. There are many other things that are worse that a woman (and sometimes a man) has to live with that are SO much worse than a quickie roll in the sack by your typical sneaky married cheater/player.

I am going to say this one time then I'm done with this ridiculous nonsense. Certainly there ARE worse things than being cheated on. Unless we're talking about a serial cheater; that's a whole other subject. But in simple terms of a little affair outside the marriage or a one nighter where he got caught? What about all those times you DIDN'T catch him? uhmmmm... Now there's a curve ball for ya!

It is FAR worse to be married to a druggie or a drunk who comes in drinking or drunk, cursing and slapping you and the kids around, blows all the money, keeps you in debt, constantly overdraws the checking account, running up insufficient funds charges that you CANNOT afford to pay but have too anyway, he takes every dime you have out of your purse, including YOUR hard earned money that you stood on your feet earning all day and curses you because there wasn't more; you don't even know if you will have lunch money tomorrow for your kids or if you can purchase a box of sanitary napkins, or gasoline for your car so you can get BACK to work so he can take the money you earned the next time too.

You don't know if he's coming home tonight, tomorrow or next week and when he does, he just might knock the hell outta you AND the kids because you spent too much money on groceries. Sure you did; you didn't hold back enough for him to drink on, to hell with the groceries, now he's really p'ssed. Your kids try to hide but they can't dodge out quickly enough, and dare not cry. For that they might get the heavy hand of a belt buckle.

AND other issues. Mental, verbal, financial and physical, (including alcoholic and/or drug abuse) most frequently can't even be healed in the long run, but adultery CAN be healed. OH YEAH sweetie, count your blessings; there are FAR worse things than being married to a cheater. THAT ones' fairly simple to fix. But some of you don't get it and you never will.

NO, I have never been married to a drinker or a druggie, I don't even drink or allow anyone in my home who does; but I certainly know of others who HAVE been and I KNOW what they've had to suffer with a drunk and abusive spouse.

I'm SO done with this issue.

Unknown said...

Anon-

I'm not surprised that you didn't address the issue of your contradiction, or that you AGAIN implied that my husband cheats on me. You seem unable to converse without the use of wild tangents, (like writing 2+ paragraphs about the horrors of being married to an abusive druggie/drunk, which you eventually say has never happened to you, lol).

I feel sorry for you. You are the one with the skewed world view. I don't expect, or accept that my husband will cheat on me. The fact that you do probably explains why you have been married to two men who you say were cheaters. I can't control anyone's actions but my own, and I am faithful to my husband. I expect NOTHING LESS from him. He knows me well, AND knows that if he strays, the consequenses will be swift and crushing.

If he were to choose to give up the home, and family we have built for over a decade, that would be his prerogative. I'm not naive enough to say ANYTHING could never happen to me. But I assure you, if it did...I wouldn't waste a minute of my life, or my kids lives, downgrading the level of respect expected within a REAL marriage. (Not a legally binding union to share child raising expenses, or an investment for financial security that you seem to think marriage is all about).

Anonymous said...

I read the first sentence of you post at 7:45 Jew OW. You silly woman! For heavens' sakes, I did NOT imply that your husband is cheating on you, per 'se.

Good Lord, I would have no way of knowing if your hubby is cheating on you nor is it my concern to even speculate!! I was speaking in generalities.

From there, I will end my part of this conversation and NOT bother to read or to answer any more of your questions or implications. It's just not worth it. I could be watching a good movie and not diddling with this waste-of-time nonsense. Maybe you should do the same? Just a thought.

Seriously, have a good evening. Bye now.

Anonymous said...

BTW, you with your wild imagination all based on pure speculation; I did NOT say that my first husband cheated on me! Ha... SO now I've gone back and read the first part of your second paragraph. AGAIN, another misnomer.

You need to go back and reread my posts if this is what you concluded. You see, there you go again. Conjuring up misconceptions that are far from being true. SOOo not worth having any more discussions with you.

JerseyJane said...

Anon,
I give your husband more credit than you. He cheated, he changed to walk with the lord, and he lives in your imprisoned ways...
You are the one that has changed and lost the meaning of marriage and is instead a "money whore".
Maybe ur time is running out, you now are the loser. Your man now stands taller then you and is waiting for you to join him..

JerseyJane said...

A cheater is close to a druggie in the sense that they can kill you with HIV/AIDS and Hep C... But yeah, it's not that bad according to Anon..I would say that gets as worse as it gets....like until death do us part... Yup, cheating not a big deal...... Uhhhhhh, wrong!!! LoL

Unknown said...

Anon,

I thought you didn't even read my response, and were done with this conversation, lol.

I guess you will be done NOW, that you got in a few more digs about how I am 'silly', and full of wild speculation. I am utterly devastated by your assessment of me, and I'm not sure if my fragile female psyche will ever fully recover! ;-)

Your comments speak for themselves. You have contradicted yourself repeatedly, (even in your TWO, 'last' comments.)

It appears you just enjoy being condescending and argumentative. Good luck with that.

Anonymous said...

The sooner women learn their self worth isn't dependent on a man, the sooner they'll realize they don't have to remain with a man who may be a walking STD.

Maggie, Jen-Ow you are both spot on. The QUEEN analogy, I love that. Perfectly put!

JerseyJane said...

^^^^ Yes, Ditto... LONG LIVE the QUEENS!!! :-))

KA- chOW, Jen OW !!!!!!!

Randie said...

Analyze this post:

( Anonymous said...

BTW Jen; I saw all the reasons you and a few others gave for believing I am Tammy Moorer. Wrong. That's your blind misconception AND theirs.

How many times do I have to say that some people look to find something wrong that they already believed in the first place, will make false accusations based on their speculations and misconceptions, when they are dead wrong yet keep on digging trying to prove their misconceptions? So there you have it.

I am NOT Tammy Moorer, don't know the woman and don't want too. However, I DO have empathy for others and it is not so difficult for me to put myself in their unfortunate position. Have you ever tried it? Maybe you should.

January 28, 2014 at 2:23 PM)

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Two things I saw:

1. "BTW Jen; I saw all the reasons you and a few others gave for believing I AM TAMMY MOORER. Wrong. That's your blind misconception AND theirs."

SCAN sees the imbedded words: "I am Tammy Moorer"

2. "I am NOT Tammy Moorer, don't know the woman and don't want too. However, I DO have empathy for others and it is not so difficult for me to put myself in their unfortunate position."

SCAN sees that there is a dropped pronouns..."don't know the woman" also "don't want to" ....This person has no problem using the word "I" but here she drops the pronoun. This person won't own the words.

Statement analysis is awesome!



Maggie said...

I had forgotten to check back in on this thread and now I have just gotten caught up here.
Anon who keeps the control of the money, you've been on this site before talking about how much you hate Trista Reynolds. You had the same comments to make how you are not in anyone's league, yada, yada, yada and are done talking to the people who were talking to you "because they are not in your league", etc. I am very confident you are that same person who had expressed a lot of animosity towards Trista Reynolds.

Anonymous said...

Actually, it didn't seem like much focus was on Tammy until after her classless FB rant. It must have been difficult seeing her much younger and much prettier opponent still getting all the love and attention, but from the community. Seems like her rant was a cry for "hey look at me!" purpose.

Anonymous said...

Imo, posting on FB was a cry for attention and sympathy, which backlashed on her. Apparently, in Tammy's fantasy world, she's the victim in all of this, which is far from the truth IMHO

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmm where have I seen a similar post like this????....
Oh Jennifer, you change personalities but not your tune huh

Anonymous said...

It gets worse though.... Apparently, Mrs. Moorer isn't very shy about sharing photos of her genitalia or others for that matter through text messages. I know... I utter to think about it, but from my understanding she's pretty raunchy in more ways than the back corners of a seedy strip club

Anonymous said...

TM is pathetic! She's obviously a blooming IDIOT trying to make it appear that she and SM have the perfect happy little marriage when the world knows better! If I were in her shoes I would be TOTALLY embarrassed posting pics of myself and my UNFAITHFUL husband looking like the HAPPY couple. It makes me sick to my stomach. I guess it helps her ego because she thinks she's showing the world that it's really her that he loves and wants after all. Get over yourself honey! Those staged pictures don't convince me of anything other than how stupid you are! Then she's so full of herself thinking she looks so hot and young just because a HANDFUL of friends compliment her pictures. NEWSFLASH... That's what friends say even when nothing is further from the truth because she's almost as ugly as her ugly a** husband that she's so PROUD of! At least after all the trash talking everyone has done about him he did finally wash his hair and trim his beard. So funny! I truly believe that SM is responsible for whatever happened to Heather and that TM may have been responsible as well.It was probably at her demand to prove his love for her. It's obvious that she's unbelievably insecure in her marriage and appearance that's why she's posting all the happy couple pics and fishing for compliments because she has no self esteem. Someone get this THING some therapy to work out her issues so that she doesn't embarrass herself any further! Then there's the links she's posting about TE that are merely judgements for medical bills, seat belt tickets, and things of that nature and acting like he's some HARD CORE criminal and pointing out that there's nothing on her to be found. Well when they haul her away and put her in that orange jumpsuit there will be PLENTY and she sure won't be able to PHOTO SHOP that mugshot! LMAO I can't wait until that day comes and it WILL come. She's all smug now because she thinks that they got away with it but soon her world will come crashing down and she will fall off of that high horse she's on. Otherwise, she better be holding her breath every second for the rest of her life because I'm a firm believer of KARMA,what comes around goes around ten times worse and if they don't pay for what they've done it will come for them. She has 3 children of her own, so if justice is not done it WILL come around and they will experience the pain and loss that they have caused Heather's family for what they have taken from them. Remember that TM... come clean now for your children's sake before karma makes THEM pay for YOUR sins! ,

Anonymous said...

Tammy Moorer is on here commenting, wonder who in here can spot it.

Anonymous said...

I am curious about the watch Heather is wearing in her last text picture that she sent to her father on cell phone. Heather was wearing a white watch in that photo. Morgan Elvis ( Heather's sister ) seems to be wearing a white watch very similar to Heather's in some of her newest Facebook pictures. Is it Heathers watch? Did Heather leave it behind in her apartment that night that she went missing?

Anonymous said...

You are correct. She did post that comment after someone commented on her house. However she did not just randomly post a pic of her house for her friends to see. Almost everything on her fb is private. She made this pic public and titled it "come on we got something for you". It was clear that she was taunting TE. IMO, She is CRAZY! And I withheld like to also add that if she was not angry that he cheated because she had a boyfriend of her own, why did I read several times that she physically attacked HE in Wal-Mart parking lot and also I am pretty sure that I read she had someone else attack her at her work place.

Anonymous said...

This is a private message sent to someone, probably in response to accusations. She is making the point that she is not at fault...Sidney cheated and is stupid, the "psycho whore" , and the "crazy daddy." She does have a right to defend herself against allegations. And honestly she does have every right to be angry. Some insensitive person who was probably baiting her decided to make a private message national.

Anonymous said...

Because the male is very capable of lying with a straight face and knows exactly what to say. Honestly,Heather's own statements show that she had no respect for another woman's marriage or family.

Anonymous said...

Living with a psychopath can do that to a person. They can twist someone's mind and play with their emotions so much that sooner or later the person lacks any emotion....numb. And there is anger and rage for all the injustice they have had to live with. I'm guessing Sidney is good at convincing Tammy to direct the rage at everyone else instead of where it belongs.

Anonymous said...

I thought so too!

Anonymous said...

In regards to Anon Who May Or May Not Be TM:

One of these things is not like the others, one of these things doesn't belong…and it's you.

As Jack Nicholson so eloquently put it on "As Good As It Gets": Go sell crazy somewhere else; we're all stocked up here.

Anonymous said...

anon 3:29, that was not a PM. It was a public post on her page. Her page was not private. She posted everything she did because she wanted it to be seen by the public. I do see that TM was here posting. Guess she won't be any more!

Randie said...

Rereading all the comments here... I have decided that it was Tammy Moorer posting on here. Now that she is in jail.....hmmmmm won't be seeing her posts anymore.

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