Monday, March 31, 2014

Oscar Pistorius Messages

This is an interesting article:

Note some of the quotes that the psychologist used in informing the court of his character and that of his girlfriend.

The fights:
January 19
Steenkamp: There are a lot of things that could make us feel like shit.
Pistorius: I'm just very honest.
Steenkamp: I won't always think before I say something, just appreciate I'm not a liar.
Pistorius: I know, it was just when you got back from Tropica  you made it seem like you smoked weed once. I don't know if you took other things.
Steenkamp: I'm sorry if it upset you, it wasn't my intention.
Pistorius: I do appreciate it, I could never be with someone who was.
Steenkamp: Me neither.
January 27
Steenkamp: Today was one of my best friends' engagements and I wanted to stay longer. I was enjoying myself but it's over now. You have picked on me incessantly since you got back from CT and I understand that you are sick but it's nasty. I was not flirting with anyone today. I feel sick that u suggested that and that u made a scene at the table and made us leave early. I'm terribly disappointed in how the day ended and how u left me. We are living in a double-standard relationship where u can be mad about how I deal with stuff when u are very quick to act cold and offish when you're unhappy. Every 5 seconds I hear how u dated another chick ... yet you get upset if I tell ONE funny story with a long-term boyfriend. I do everything to make u happy and to not say anything to rock the boat with u. You do everything to throw tantrums in front of people ... I can't get that day back. I'm scared of u sometimes and how u snap at me and of how u will react to me. You make me happy 90% of the time and I think we are amazing together but I am not some other bitch you may know trying to kill your vibe. I am the girl who let go with u even when I was scared out of my mind to. I'm the girl who fell in love with u and wanted to tell u this weekend. But I'm also the girl that gets side stepped when you are in a shit mood when I feel you think u have me, so why try anymore. I get snapped at and told my accents and voices are annoying. I touch your neck to show u I care, you tell me to stop. Stop chewing gum. Do this, don't do that. Your impression of something innocent blown out of proportion ... f***** up a special day for me. I'm sorry if you truly felt I was hitting on my friend Sam's husband and I'm sorry that u think that little of me. From the outside I think it looks like we are a struggle and maybe that's what we are. I just want to love and be loved. Be happy and make someone SO happy. Maybe we can't do that for each other. Cos right now I know u aren't happy and I am certainly very unhappy and sad.
Pistorius: I want to talk to you, I want to sort this out. I don't want to have anything less than amazing for you and I'm sorry for the things I say without thinking and for taking offence to some of your actions. The fact that I'm tired and sick isn't an excuse. I was upset that you just left me after we got food to go talk to a guy and I was standing right behind you watching you touch his arm and ignore me ... when I left you just kept on chatting to him when clearly I was upset ... When we left I was starving. The only food I'd had was a tiny wrap and everyone was leaving for lunch. I'm sorry I wanted to go but I was hungry and upset, and although you knew, it wasn't like you came to chat to me when I left the table. I was upset when I left you cause I thought you were coming to me. I'm sorry I asked you to stop tapping my neck yesterday. I know you were just trying to show me love ... I had a mad headache and should've just spoken to you softly. I'm sorry for asking you not to put on an accent last night.
February 7
Steenkamp: I like to believe that I make u proud when I attend these kinds of functions with u. I present myself well and can converse with others whilst u are off busy chatting to fans/friends. I also knew people there tonight, and whilst u were having one or 2 pics taken I was saying goodbye to people in my industry ... I completely understood your desperation to leave and thought I would be helping u by getting to the exit before u because I can't rush in the heels I was wearing. I thought it would make a difference in us getting out without u being harassed. I didn't think you would criticise me for doing that, especially not so loudly so that others could hear. I might ... be all tomboyish at times but I regard myself as a lady and I didn't feel like one tonight after the way u treated me when we left. I'm a person too and I appreciate that u invited me out tonight and I realise that u get harassed but I am trying my best to make u happy and I feel as tho u sometimes never are, no matter the effort I put in. I can't be attacked by outsiders for dating u AND be attacked by you, the one person I deserve protection from.
The love:
January 9
Steenkamp: You are a very special person. U deserve to be looked after.
Pistorius: Will you please let me know you safe.
Steenkamp: I'm home boo.
February 4
Steenkamp: If u want to go chill with M, that's OK angel.
Pistorius: No, I want to chill with you. I miss you.
Steenkamp: I miss you too.
February 11
Pistorius: I miss you 1 more than you always.
Steenkamp: Impossible.


deejay said...

I wonder how old he was when he had the accident with his legs? Sounds like his family catered to his every whim after that and raised an emotional 12 year old.

Ney said...

It sounds like Reeva was a good hearted, kind and clever woman. She did sense his temper and that his jelousy was dangerous. It is so sad she wasn't able to escape that day. These messages between them clearly show his escalating anger, and his wish to have total control over her.

Anonymous said...

His"stumps"smell of"Disabled".

trustmeigetit said...

His legs were removed when he was a baby.

I heard she saw her ex boyfriend earlier this day. I think that started the fight. He has already proven he is jealous and does not even feel the need to hide it in public.

Someone got on the computer (possible phone line) around 1 am shorty before neighbors heard them begin fighting. I think she was upset and possibly was planning to leave and called someone.

I am then sure she went to the bathroom to get away from him. The door was locked. You don’t lock the door unless you have a reason. My ex was abusive. I often locked myself in our bathroom to get away from him. That immediately stuck out to me.

And the cricket bat… I think that was his first weapon of choice.

I think he went after her with that. I think she hid in the bathroom and locked the door. I think he tried to break down the door to get to her..

I think when that didn’t work, he shot through the door.

I think he then did use it again to break the door down again.

I think he is off and on. I think he is remorseful about what he did….. But I also think he would do it again if provoked by jealously or anger.

Tania Cadogan said...

All the classic signs of an abuser of women.

it wasn't a case of if, rather a case of when and sadly Reeva was his victim. Hopefully the judge won't be swayed by his fame or money or the fact he is disabled, i hope she looks only at the facts of the case which indicate murder.
Whether this was premeditaed or in a rage is hard to say though i would go with premeditated, he went back to get his gun which precludes spur of the moment, a fraction of a second can be all that is needed to show premeditation.
At no point has he said yet that he called out for her on hearing a noise even if to ask if she heard anything (expected)or to call security, after the first shot which i suspect was her hip, she would have screamed causing him to realise it was her in the toilet not a burglar, the pause between shots is telling, he had time to stop and think where is reeva, she hasn't made a sound on hearing a gun shot or screamed from the bedroom. That alone should have given him pause for thought, a chance to stop before more damage was done, yet he didn't, he fired 3 further shots. He knew who was in the toilet and carried on shooting. This made it premeditated, he was angry at her and this was how he handled it. I saw a photo of the bat and what stood out to me was the pattern of blood spatter. Some were drops caused by gravity on the would ( round sircles) yet i also noticed streaks and teardrops indicating movement, did he strike her with the bat i wonder? The first blow would be free it causes the open wound, subsequent blows will cause blood to spray from the open wound as it made contact, i wonder if there was any blood spray on the ceiling? As the bat was swung back, blood on the bat would have flown off causing a distinctive pattern. if there is this pattern on the walls/ceiling then it blows his claim of it being an intruder well and truly out the window.

Tania Cadogan said...

I noticed he said he tried to kick the door in, however in the pictures, the door opened outwards. kicking at it would only have set the door further into the doorframe.

trustmeigetit said...

"There was no argument. The allegation I wanted to shoot or kill Reeva could not be further from the truth," he said.

Not a reliable denial.

Sella35 said...

@Hobs- you said, "All the classic signs of an abuser of women."... I agree and I will say, she had all the classic signs of an abused woman.

Tania Cadogan said...

didn't think you would criticise me for doing that, especially not so loudly so that others could hear.

I can't be attacked by outsiders for dating u AND be attacked by you, the one person I deserve protection from.

I notice she changed from U to you in the above statement. She uses YOU when she refers to being cricised in public loudly and in relation to being attacked by the one person she deserves protection from.

Looking at the last 7 words it struck me as telling.

the one person I deserve protection from.

was this a leaked marble?
can this be taken in two ways?
Protecting her from others?
Protecting her from himself?

Anonymous said...

Hobnob are you a policewoman? You are very intelligent.

trustmeigetit said...

I still think if he heard something, what would most of us do. Wake up our partner and tell them “someones in the house”

And, the lay out of the home is one that if they thought the person was really closed up in the bathroom, run out of the bedroom and out of the apartment. In fact, this was the shorter route.

If you are that scared, you don’t seek the robber out if you can avoid them and get out.

This layout allows for this.

And first and foremost, people do not break into your home and go into the bathroom stall. They have no reason to be in there… I mean robbers are trying to get in and out, not stop for a bathroom break. And lets look at that realistically, who would go into a small room and close the door. They are basically trapping themselves.

The whole thing makes no sense as an accident.

Makes perfect sense as a rage kill that he later regrets.

One another note. I saw an article, a homeless woman (HOMELESS) left her kids in their car to run into a job interview. She was arrested for this. Gerry and Kate Mccann still walk free even from child endangerment charges.

What a world we live in.

Not condoning what this woman did, but I bet she had no options at all and was hoping to get a job to improve things.

Anonymous said...

Oscar deserves an"Oscar"he's a murdering dwarf.

somanyways said...

ugh. abusers are the worst. and always so self pittying. I think that's something that people who haven't been subject to one don't always get -- the self pity -- they suck the life out of their victims with their self pity.

Skeptical said...

He is a skilled "crazy maker". He repeatedly attempts to turn Reva's words against her and make her think that the problems are all her fault. From her responses, there are still indications that he doesn't have complete control of her and this enrages him.

Unknown said...

I agree Hobos-

He is a classic abuser.

This also seems like a classic case of a woman being murdered when she attempts to leave an abusive situation.

Pistorius had plenty of time to consider his actions, yet he escalated and continued his murderous pursuit of Reeva, even as she cowered, trapped behind the locked bathroom door.

His account of suspecting an intruder makes ZERO sense, and is impossible based on the accounts of the independent witnesses who heard them loudly arguing.

John Mc Gowan said...

Pistorius: I WANT to talk to you, I WANT to sort this out. I don't want to have anything less than amazing for you and I'm sorry for the things I say without thinking and for taking offence to some of your actions.

For me, this is demanding and controlling language. It is all about what he "Wants"

If i was to argue with my partner i would say, can WE talk, can WE sort things out. I would include her. It should after all be a partnership, even if it goes tits up now and again.

Anonymous said...

OT: police find man's body in search for Relisha Rudd:

Nanna Frances said...


Relisha Rudd's mother said she is "a hell of a good."

Anonymous said...

Did anyone see the "stag"interrupt proceedings?it ran into the courtroom a bit ago.

Anonymous said...

I agree Jen Ow. It appears to be a classic case of a woman being murdered when she is trying to leave.

Anonymous said...

I don´t agree that he has remorse at all. He just feels sorry for himself and is trying to get off by manipulating the courtroom with his hysterics. Pathetic.

Given that the exchange of texts is textbook abuser' abused I don´t understand why his lawyers think they´ll get him off. HE comes across as paranoid, jealous, sulky while she tiptoes around him. She says she´s afraid of him.

It´s unbearable to imagine what she went through in that bathroom, And afterwards, being carried in his arms and hearing him lie about it while her life slipped away.

Guilty. I hope he gets life.

I found her messages to him heartbreaking... to wit ´´I can´t get that day back´´

She can´t get her life back either.

Pistorios is a monster.

elf said...

Before I read anyone's analysis or comments, I want to comment on the cycle they seem to have been in, the domestic violence cycle. Just from those brief exchange you can see it : the fight > he apologizes > she accepts > she apologizes. Then inevitably the fighting again. So sad.

Anon "I" said...

Wow! One of the comments at this link says that she was dressed and had her purse and cell phone with her when she was shot.,0,7321466.story?page=2#axzz2xs5Es2AF

Anon "I"