Monday, June 26, 2017

Lyn Balfour Statement on Death of Her Son in Car

thermometer in hot car

The following is an interview that took places several years after the death of her son.  

Gross Negligence:  

Question for Analysis:  Is she honest about not knowing there was a phone call from the babysitter?

Did she willfully ignore the call, or, as she claimed, did she not know it came through?

'I Left My Baby in a Hot Car': One Mom Shares Her Tragic Story

How do you leave a child in a hot car? It's a question every parent has asked at one time or another -- usually sparked by a headline about a child dying in a vehicle somewhere in the United States. Lyn Balfour has asked the question too. She's asked the question about herself.
The 13-year veteran of the US Army, member of the Army Reserves, and mother of five -- including three children 6 and under -- left her son Bryce in her car on March 30, 2007. By the time she realized her mistake, her 9-month-old son was dead.
After being charged with his death and later being found not guilty, Balfour has became a fierce advocate for educating parents on these accidental tragedies. She spoke with The Stir about the day her son died, and what kind of mom leaves a child in a hot car:

Can you walk me through that day?

This is akin to "tell me what happened that day." 

This particular week, my husband had accidentally backed into my sister's car in the driveway, so her car was in the shop and she was using my husband's. So, he was riding with me to work, and I was dropping him off first and then the baby 

The account does not begin "that day", but she does not reflect back the language of the interviewer with "that day."  This takes extra effort. 

In this verbalized perception of reality, the death of the victim began "that week", not that day. 

Here we also note the first reference to the victim, who is "the baby" here.  

This particular week, my son Bryce had been really fussy. 

Here is a good social introduction.  It includes the victim's name, title and status in relation to the subject.  This came after the introduction of "the baby", which is unusual.

Note that the subject is being interviewed about the death of her child and here begins by complaining about the child.  

Where the subject began is important and the subject's linguistic disposition about the victim is important.  

She next gives us specific details as to his behavior:  

He had a bad head cold, wasn't sleeping well because he couldn't suck on his pacifier at the same time, so he kept waking up.
The first three nights of the week, I had gotten up with him the majority of the night, and I was exhausted

We are now beginning to see how the death of the victim was not "that day" but began earlier.  

Instead of simply saying, "I forgot he was in the car", or even "I forgot because I was exhausted", the subject goes back in time to begin her statement and sets a reason about herself.  

Here is why the dating is important: 

That last night

There is a culmination of events leading to the victim's death. 

1.  He was fussy
2.  I was tired 

my husband agreed to get up with him, but then he couldn't find his pacifier in his bed. 

"agreed" suggests disagreement, negotiation.  

Bryce went ballistic, woke up completely, and then I got up, was up with him for another hour and a half to two hours.

The expected of mothers who have lost children is consistently the same:  the lofty almost "angelic" like status of the victim.  

This is not what we find here. 

The expectation is also consistent:  mothers blame themselves even when no blame should be assigned.  

They care more about what the victim went through than their own status. 

The emphasis here is not the day of his death, but the week that she suffered through.  

An example of this is when a teenager went missing and was found murdered.  Her father, who was her protector, blamed himself as years earlier, he moved the family to a state where she was murdered.  Self blame is the norm. 

"I should have seen the signs"
"I should have done this differently..."

Here we have an entire alibi set up to distance herself from her action that led to the victim's death. 

What is wrong about complaining about the victim?

Guilt seeks to alleviate itself and can be so subtle as to attempt to justify action by showing a negative status of the victim.  

"The baby would not stop crying" or "he would not eat..." is heard in Shaken Baby deaths.  

That was about 5 o'clock in the morning. I had to be up at 6:30 in order to get ready for work. I didn't actually get up until 7:15 because I was exhausted.

The initial thought in my mind was just to call in, stay home with Bryce because he was just very lethargic, he wasn't being normal because he was really tired too. But I had appointments that day -- at the  school, students were graduating and I had no way to call the students that I had appointments with. I was like, you know what? It's Friday, I've just got to get through today and I can sleep tomorrow.

That particular morning, Jarrett got Bryce ready. He went to get in the vehicle, but before I came outside we were talking about a spare car seat that we could not get into the car correctly. He had been in the car seat for a couple of weeks, but it just wasn't sitting as secure as we felt it should be so we took that car seat out and put it in his old car seat.

Context:  The subject brings up a topic of a difficulty in the interview about her child's death.  

The difficulty is the "spare car seat" not fitting properly.  

Note:  Only a "good parent" would care that the car seat fit perfectly in.  

That particular day, he said, "When are you going to get the car seat put in?" I said, "Put it in the car today, and I will go to like the fire department and get them to put it in correctly at lunch time."
He put the spare car seat in the car behind the front passenger seat in my field of view, and that car seat was empty. The other car seat, which is the car seat Bryce was in, when he put him in he put it behind my seat, the driver's seat.

In the account of the death of her child, this is a lot of detail about a car seat that was not used.  

Here is a dramatic change in language and a dramatic shift away from maternal instinct:  

On the way to work ... we don't remember hearing him. We don't remember talking with him or him cooing or anything like he normally would. We just assume it was because he was really tired.

There are several points here to note:

1.  In an open statement when one tells us what is not remembered, it is a signal of missing information.

2.  This signal of missing information's sensitivity is made even higher as she does not own it for herself, but uses the pronoun "we."

3.  Note the need to tell what someone else remembers, what someone else does not remember

4.  Note the need to report what is "normally" done. 

Consider what took place before this rule of the negative:

She has complained about the victim
She has repeatedly told what she went through
She has repeated her status of exhaustion.  

I dropped my husband off, and shortly after that I got a phone call from work, from a co-worker. It was the first sergeant of the school very upset because we were honoring a fallen soldier from Iraq, his family was supposed to be coming in from California and the tickets had not been purchased through the travel agent that the military uses.

Here, the mother of the victim slows down an already slow pace, with unnecessary details that would need to persuade us that she was not only distracted but details on who distracted her and what was used to distract her. 

All in an account of her child's death.  

This is a very strong example of one who has a need to persuade.  

Lyn and Jarrett BalfourThat was my area of responsibility -- I was transportation officer for the JAG school. I immediately got on the phone, started making phone calls, called the family that was waiting at the airport, talked to the gate agent, said please don't let the plane go, this is very important for this family to get on the flight.

Is this while you were still driving?

Yes, when I was on my way to work.
In my mind, I'd already made a stop, baby's dropped off. I passed right by where I would normally turn left to drop Bryce off to daycare.

Before I got to work, I got things resolved. I got ahold of the travel agent, they paged the tickets, everything.

I got to work, got out of the car and went into work like normal...

The subject wishes to portray this as normal; a signal that she knows it was anything but normal.  It is not that leaving a baby is "normal" that is conquering: 

It is the need to convince the audience of such that is a red flag.  

I get a phone call about 10:30 in the morning from the babysitter asking how Bryce was doing that day.

This is a very straight forward statement:  she got a phone call at the time stated, by whom she claimed, and about what she claimed.  

Note she does not say "she called me twice" or "I had a missed call."  She is in experiential memory language and she is telling the truth.  We should believe her.  

This is not a statement of missing a call; but a statement of fact.  There are so many other ways one would describe this including,
"I had a missed call from 10:30 that morning" which would place her:

a.  hours later (4pm)
b.  looking back (appropriately)

Instead, she placed herself, linguistically, in the knowledge of the call. 

This is an indicator of guilty knowledge of the call at the time it came in.  

Here, with this in mind, note what comes next:  

 The problem was I didn't get the phone call because she called my personal cellphone because the Friday before she had gotten a brand new cellphone and didn't have any of my work contact information in her phone.

This is extremely sensitive information and likely something where there is not only missing information, but information a prosecutor used.  The need to explain "why" in two locations very quickly, is something that must be explored for deception.  

That was communication failure number one.

The blaming of communication is void of personal responsibility.  This is not consistent with maternal instinct. 

The second thing was that in her file in her home she had all our contact information, my work cellphone number, my work office number, my husband's work office number but she just naturally assumed -- because it had happened in the past -- that I stayed home and he wasn't feeling well.

Note the blame shifted to the babysitter using the wrong number, but then shifted to being such a diligent worker but great mother who usually stays home with her sick child.  This is all part of her necessary portrayal of self.  

Question:  where this hyper sensitivity exists, is there deception?

Answer:  We listen for the subject to guide us.  

She didn't think to continue to communication, not thinking that he was accidentally not dropped off.

What time frame was this when she made the call?

10:30 in the morning.
I wasn't in the office when she called, but around 2 p.m., I pulled my cellphone personal cellphone out of my purse and I saw a missed call from her.

Deception Indicated. 

Here the subject tells us

1.  Where she wasn't 
2.   Where her phone was
3.  The physical action of pulling out the phone 

This is likely the missing information where you see the two blue colorings above.  

She had called me twice that morning. She called that first time and left a message and then she called again. It said missed call, but it never told me there was a message available.

Now she gives additional information in going back in time:  it was not just that the babysitter called to check on the well being of the child, but that the babysitter called twice. 

"it said missed call but it never told me..." 

"it" is to blame here. 

At 2:30, I saw the missed call, I called her back, and I left her a message. She'd taken her other daycare kids to McDonald's as a treat, and around 2:30 she was still out ... So, I called and left a message ... she called me back when she saw a missed call from me at about 10 to 4.

I was just walking out of my office because we'd been given an hour out early. She asked me how Bryce was doing, and I was like "what do you mean?"
I didn't understand. I said, "Did Jarrett pick him up early?" not thinking that he didn't have a car because I had dropped him off.
She's like no, he's not here. She began to panic because I was so adamant that he was there.
Then, she turned around and she's like, "No Lyn, you didn't drop him off."
The whole morning flashes through my mind, and I can remember dropping him off. I can remember having a conversation with her. And that memory never happened. That conversation never happened. 
At this point, I panic. I ran to the car because I couldn't believe there was a possibility he could still be in the car and then I saw him in the car.

When you found him, what did you see?
He was in the backseat, he was hooked in, and he was not responsive. He was not breathing.
Bryce BalfourWhat did you do?
I started screaming and said, "Please somebody call 911!" And then -- even though I was extremely hysterical -- it's kind of hard to explain but my military training kind of took over.
I unhooked him, pulled him out of the car, ran around to the other side of the car, laid him on the ground, and started CPR.
What was the temperature that day?
The high that day was 66 degrees.
Do they know what that translates to in the car?
I don't recall specifically what the temperature was in the vehicle -- they took the measurement at 4:30 in the afternoon, but I think it was around 100 degrees. It was too hot for the child to be in the car, obviously.
It was only 39 degrees when we left the house that morning ... he probably passed away later in the morning or early afternoon because it was so cold that day, but on an 80-degree day, a child can die in 30 minutes or less.
The degrees once you turn off a vehicle can go up 10 degrees every 5 minutes, and children under a certain age do not have the type of temperature control that adults have. 
Obviously you're very educated about this now, but before this happened, did you know any of this?
No. And the thing now, which is why I'm an advocate, is because when they told me they couldn't save him, I said to myself, "How can I forget my kid? I can manage $47 million for the US military with every penny accounted for, and I was awarded a Bronze Star for those efforts, but how can I forget my kid? How can a loving, responsible, detail-oriented parent forget him, something so precious, something so valuable?"
I started educating myself and doing research on why it was possible and how it was possible.
The more research I did, the more I learned ... we have educated ourselves on babyproofing our home, but we do not educate ourselves on babyproofing our vehicles and that's what we need to do.
Unlike some parents I was absolutely blessed to have the opportunity to hold my son one last time and tell him goodbye, and I made a promise to him that no matter how painful it would be to go through my story over and over and over again if just one parent listens and understood about the dangers and educated themselves and took the prevention measures for vehicles ... his death would be worth it.
It would be worth losing a child to save 100. No parent wants to feel like I do every day, to be responsible for your own child's death
While you were there holding him, who responded?
The police and ambulance arrived.
What happened then?
They took over; they're more professional than I am.
They wouldn't let me ride in the back of the ambulance while they were working on him, but I rode up in front with the driver, and I called my husband and told him he had to get to the hospital right away because there was an accident, I forgot him in the car.
He didn't really understand because I was hysterical.
They took him into a room and were working on him while I was in the waiting room of the hospital and one of the doctors came in and said it wasn't looking good. I started praying to God to just take me.
Then maybe about 10 minutes later ... it seemed like a lifetime ... they came in and told me they couldn't save him.
I was hysterical, and all I could think of was how am I going to tell my husband that I killed his son?
What happened when your husband did get there?
The first sergeant of the school told my husband the news. She is a pastor at a church, and she was probably the best person to be able to tell him.
He came in and he was really upset and he was crying. I told him I was so sorry I forgot him.
They probably would not have let us see him and I don't even know if I would have been in the state of mind to ask to hold him one last time, but my husband said, "I want to see him, I want to see my son."
So, they escorted us into the room to see him one last time.
It was completely unbelievable and shocking to have to leave that hospital without him.
When you left the hospital, did you go home or were the police already there?
I got to go home, but the lead investigator on the case, they interviewed me at the hospital. I don't remember that at all.
That was on a Friday. I didn't talk to the police again until they arraigned me. That following Monday, I woke up and my mom and everybody got down there on Saturday and Sunday. They recommended that I get an attorney. I called a couple of attorneys to see what I would need to do.
The interesting thing was the lead investigator on the case walked in to the hospital that same day and told the first responders on the case, "OK, you guys go ahead and write your statements because we're going to charge her for everything you can."
He had not spoken to me and he had not spoken to my husband when he made that statement. So he already had his pre-formed opinion that I was guilty and they were going to go after me, and he was the one who set the tone for the case....
Nobody ever gets arraigned on a Saturday unless you're slapped with handcuffs and taken to jail, but they waited until the day of my son's funeral on a Friday to tell me they were arraigning me on charges the next day. Forty minutes after my son's funeral was over, I was at my house and the attorney I had spoken to, they called her and told her that I was going to be arraigned the following day.
I was really upset, and I was just like .... we're not going to be able to put our lives back together as a family, we have to go immediately into defense mode. My son died on the 30th of March. My husband left on the 21st of June to deploy to Iraq as a government contractor for 18 months in order to cover my attorney fees which ended up being $126,000.
What was the charge?
The initial charge was second degree murder and felony child abuse and neglect. They later amended that dropping the abuse and neglect and reducing the second degree to involuntary manslaughter.
Here in Virginia, it says willful act or admission. That was not the case. I didn't knowingly do that.
How long did the whole thing drag out? Did they put you through a long trial?
He died in March; I was charged the following week. The trial was like the 28th of January 2008. 
What was it like trying to grieve your child's death and on the other hand you don't know what's going to happen?
My perspective on it's a little different from other people. The thing I was worried about was my family -- my husband, my son who was at the time 14. That's who I was worried about, that's who I was stressed about it. 
My husband was getting ready to deploy, my son was trying to deal with the loss of his only sibling and his mom was facing 10 to 25 years in jail.
The thing is, I've been to a lot of place in the military that a lot of people, you see and experience things, like Bosnia. You talk to war victims and people who have gone through devastating things. I've been out in the middle of the desert during Desert Storm, and I had to go to the bathroom in a hole that I had to dig and bury.
Going to jail and sitting in a jail cell with three meals a day to me is not hell, and that's what I don't think that prosecuting attorneys and them ... they don't understand.
When they punish you for a crime they think you committed, it's supposed to be a deterrent, but how do you deter someone from accidentally forgetting your kid?
This has happened to a mathematical genius. This has happened to a NASA scientist. It has happened to a pediatrician. It's happened to numerous university professors. It's happened to the poor. It's happened to rich people. It's happened to middle class. It doesn't matter.
I explain to people who try to tell me they couldn't be that irresponsible, I was one of those parents. I had heard stories about that happening, and I said that could never happen to me, I'm not an irresponsible parent, that's got to be somebody who didn't do the right thing. That cannot be me.
I have found out it absolutely can be me, and that's why I educate. 
The reality is our brains don't differentiate between a child, a purse, a cellphone, a pair of glasses. It doesn't matter.
How do you tell parents to get past that though? If parents are stuck on that idea of "I'd never do that to my child," how do you get them past that and into actually being proactive?
If people say they can never do it, I give them examples:
I know plenty of people who take medication every day. If you didn't take that medication but you swear up and down that you did, it's call mis-remembering.
If that's happened to you, you can forget your child.
If you've ever driven anywhere, and you can't remember how you got there, that's a function of your brain going on auto-pilot. If that's ever happened to you, you can forget your child.

I give these examples because people will say, "Oh, that didn't happen to me, that didn't happen to me, OH, wait a minute, that has happened to me."
If you've ever forgotten your cellphone, your pager, your wallet, your keys, your sunglasses, and you swear you know where you put them but they are not there, and you find them in a completely different location, you can accidentally forget your child.
Do you think these examples you've found out about and this research has helped you forgive yourself?
Well ... that's an interesting question. I don't feel like I need to forgive myself. I do acknowledge and have to deal with the responsibility of forgetting my son.
But I feel like parents that do this intentionally -- they leave their kids in the car and they go somewhere, like one parent, a veterinarian, she has to deal with the fact that she went into the house and got distracted on the phone and forgot her son was in the car. She has to deal with that. That to me is like I feel you have to ask for forgiveness.
But for me, when I got out of the car that day, my son was exactly where he was supposed to be.
What I have to come to terms with, and this is what is really hard for me -- because my son usually took his first bottle in the morning at the babysitter's. Because it was so cool that morning, at some point at time he woke up because he was hungry and was in the car by himself.
That's what I have to deal with -- not being there for him.
There's nothing to forgive, but I will be accountable, I am absolutely accountable for his death. That's what I have to deal with. Can you say that that's forgiveness or not forgiveness? I don't really know. But for me the problem is that I should have been the type of parent that knew  about these dangers and made sure there were steps in place to prevent that.
It sucks. It sucks every day.
It's something that you have to live with.
I'm accountable every day. I miss him every day. He would be 8 years old today. I'll never see him grow up. I'll never see him graduate from school. I'll never see his children.

How did your family move on? How did things work with you and your husband?

He was angry for awhile but not necessarily at me. He was angry because our son was gone and there was nothing he could do about it.
Unbelievably he and I became stronger and talked about it and learned to work through it and he knew it was an accident. He knew I would never leave my children in the car, not even for a second.
It was hard for awhile to talk about him without crying. I do feel like it was a blessing in disguise that my husband was deployed except for coming home for the trial.
He was not home for any of that, so I feel like it was beneficial that he was out of the country so he didn't have to go through that.

How did you decide to try again, to have kids again?

Again, it's about love and trust. He knew I would never intentionally hurt one of our children and we just didn't not try.
The interesting thing that happened was he was going to be gone for a year and a half to Iraq. Originally it was just a year ... my husband is seven and a half years younger than me, so when I had Bryce I was 31, and so I wasn't getting any younger so to speak.
We knew he was going to be gone for a year, and we talked to a counselor, we talked to our pastor and said when is an appropriate time to grieve? When is an appropriate time to have another baby?
What our pastor said and what our counselors said was when you feel like you can, there's nothing wrong with trying. 
Bryce passed away in March. We ended up getting pregnant with Braiden in September/October, somewhere around in there.
We talked about it, and I asked him if he wanted to try, and I think that was part of the healing process -- that he was so willing to have children with me, even though we were hurting and we were grieving the loss of our son.
That for me was the most telling part of it, that he forgave me.
I do think that Braiden's birth helped us to continue to heal because it pulled us away from the loss that we felt

By the time Braiden was born, had you been found not guilty?

Yes, the trial was only like three days.
Teddy Bear in CarYou have different ways you talk to parents about recognizing they can be at risk, but what do you actually tell parents to DO?

The best tool that I can provide to them is to go to the Kids and Cars website, and what I tell them is to get in the habit of babyproofing your vehicles ...
Put a stuffed animal in the vehicle, and always, always, if you have one or 50 children, if there's a child in the car, put that animal up front with you or put something in the backseat that you're going to need when you get out of the car. I don't like that idea as much as the stuffed animal up front because you can forget your cellphone that you need and you remember 30 minutes later ... and you're in the same situation.

We've started a campaign called Look Before You Lock, so you ALWAYS get in the habit of opening the back door and looking before you lock the door.

How do you deal with the criticism and with being so public?

Because I made him a promise, and nobody can judge me more than I do myself. Nobody. It doesn't matter what they say, the harsh things. I've been told you need to be locked in a hot car and allowed to die the same way your son did, you need to have your uterus ripped out, you should never be allowed to have children again, the list goes on and on.
But none of them know me. They don't know anything about the type of person I am, what type of a mother I am.
If you don't know the type of person I am, how can you judge me?

These are not the words of an innocent mother. Innocent mothers take all blame and far more blame than deserved.  This is a self defending stance that is necessary due to the critical decision she made in not taking that call, nor in even checking up on her son of whom she reported was sick and fussy.  

The victim was not the priority of the day, as seen in the language.  

In her linguistic perception of reality, his death began a week earlier.  

Please note, she did not include drinking of beer on the night before his death and asked her friend not to report this to police.   

Analysis Conclusion:  The subject is not honest about the phone call at 10:30AM. 

She chose to ignore it, as the prosecution stated, because of prioritizing her job.  "She put herself in a situation where she was able to forget her infant," Prosecutor Killeen told the jurors. Even with the stress and tension at work, "You still have to take care of your children," she said.
"Ms. Balfour doesn't get a pass because she did this to her own child as opposed to someone else's child," continued Killeen, calling Balfour's actions "gross, wanton, and culpable neglect."

To this, the words of the subject agreed.  She chose to ignore the call deliberately, that would have saved the child's life.  

Her defensive posture is acute and not consistent with innocent mothers' statements.  

The defense said:  Zwerling offered another angle.
"She came to believe she'd dropped him off," he said. "Bryce was in a place where he was safe, sound, and happy, so she didn't have to worry. Not remembering is easy to understand when she believed he was at daycare."

The problem  here is that the subject spent a great deal of time describing how Bryce was not sound and not happy, leaving the position of mother to be one of worry and concern over her child.  She then reports of a babysitter who was concerned, and how she, herself, did not even call the daycare to see how the child was.  

This is negligence. 

 The question of the phone call was pivotal in the trial.  Here, she answers for us what the prosecutor attempted to prove. 

Becoming an "advocate" for telling people not to look their infants in their cars is part of the overall profile of guilt.  The subtle blaming of the child, the babysitter, the phone, etc, all indicate as much.  

One may consider the worth of attending a seminar to have someone who chose not to make her child a priority  lecture you to not to forget your child.  

If you wish for training in detecting deception, please visit Hyatt Analysis Services.  


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Christy said...

I agree that the missed "personal" cell phone call at 1030 is sensitive and a scapegoat for her. If she's not going to check her cell, or a answer the cell, WTH good is it? It would have saved Bryces life. Also the conversations in the car obviously distracted her, she missed the turn to the daycare. That was the part that wasn't "normal".

Hey Jude said...

I think her narrative says she was not well bonded to her baby.

'Unlike some parents I was absolutely blessed to have the opportunity to hold my son one last time and tell him goodbye, and I made a promise to him that no matter how painful it would be to go through my story over and over and over again if just one parent listens and understood about the dangers and educated themselves and took the prevention measures for vehicles ... his death would be worth it.
It would be worth losing a child to save 100'.

I think that is one of the coldest statements. Besides this:

"It was too hot for the child to be in the car, obviously. "

I think she did not want to hold him one last time.

' ...his death would be worth it. It would be worth losing a child to save 100' .

I don't believe it would be possible for a mother who was bonded to her baby to think or say such a thing - it goes against maternal instincts. She is thinking of herself 'losing a child', rather than how the death of her son was for him. It is 'her story' which is painful rather than his. She does not speak of his suffering, rather twice referring to how 'cold' it was in the car in which he baked - her concern is elsewhere, his death, somehow can be 'worth' it, because it might be 'educational'. I wonder how valued the baby was to her, that she chooses to speak in terms of 'worth' in relation to his death.

She calls her baby 'something' and does not often use his name.

She uses, 'sucks', which I think means 'Ah, well' - or is not an expression of great concern?

It took a while for her to start to panic - I would have panicked the same moment the babysitter panicked, and would immediately believe the babysitter when she said he was not there rather than argue with her:

"I said, "Did Jarrett pick him up early?" not thinking that he didn't have a car because I had dropped him off. She's like no, he's not here. She began to panic because I was so adamant that he was there. Then, she turned around and she's like, "No Lyn, you didn't drop him off." The whole morning flashes through my mind, and I can remember dropping him off. I can remember having a conversation with her. And that memory never happened. That conversation never happened. At this point, I panic."

She did not, despite the problem with the car seat, go at lunchtime to get it fitted properly at the fire station, like?

Anonymous said...

Her education of other parents seems to have lots of built in excuses. I think her campaigning for greater safety for children is geared toward her getting attention/approval.

I also don't understand how an occupation can override her attention toward her child.

Does referring to her son as "the child" indicate any sort of sexual abuse?

Peter, when do you think her son died?

Statement Analysis Blog said...


Agreed as to attention seeking.

"child" would not be indicative of sexual abuse (short answer).

When did her son die? I don't know.


Statement Analysis Blog said...

I think prosecution should have keyed in on her account of how sick the baby was prior to this, and that if true, why she, herself, did not bother to check upon the child, even once.

I don't know if this was prominent in her original statement, or editing in later, however.

It is interesting that while building a story of how worn out she was by the lack of sleep caused by the victim, she did not bother to check on him during the day.

She also did not include her beer drinking in the account.

The prosecution said she did not intend to cause the victim's death. At best, this was gross negligence.


General P. Malaise said...

she blames the baby to some extent.

" ... we don't remember hearing him. We don't remember talking with him or him cooing or anything like he normally would .."

as well as degrades him.

"This particular week, my son Bryce had been really fussy. " "Bryce went ballistic..."

She blame a variety of things (the car, car seat, phone, babysitter the baby, her job) and doesn't take anywhere near the responsibility that is hers. ultimately it was her fault her son died.

Maree said...

More than a touch of Munchhausen's Syndrome by Proxy imo. Strange how she discusses her beloved child in such a detached way and sets herself up as some sort of 'poor me' expert.

Anonymous said...

"my husband agreed to get up with him,
but then he couldn't find his pacifier in his bed.
Bryce went ballistic,
() woke up completely,
and then I got up,
() was up with him for another hour and a half to two hours.
That was about 5:00 in the morning.

Did mom get up, not yet completely awake, to help Jarrett pacify Bryce? The adjective ballistic describes the flight of an object through space. Was Bryce thrown? Bryce being "ballistic" (forcefully projected) caused mom to wake up completely. Following are two dropped pronouns and a vague time period.

The initial thought in my mind was just to call in, stay home with Bryce because he was just very lethargic, he wasn't being normal because he was really tired too.

Bryce was unresponsive.

That particular morning, Jarrett got Bryce ready. ... He had been in the car seat for a couple of weeks, but it just wasn't sitting as secure as we felt it should be so we took that car seat out and put it in his old car seat.

They put the unresponsive Bryce in his old car seat.

But for me, when I got out of the car that day, my son was exactly where he was supposed to be.


She is deceptive about the phone call. I believe she intentionally disregarded the message.

I also am not convinced that heat from that day would have been enough to kill the child. The high was only 66 and it was 39 in the morning. Even if the temperature inside the car hit 100 degrees for a period of time that day, it would be uncomfortable, but not likely to be deadly.

Anonymous said...

"Here the subject tells us
1. Where she wasn't
2. Where her phone was
3. The physical action of pulling out the phone"

What is the significance of "where" her phone was, and the "physical action of pulling out" the phone that indicates deception?

Does this also apply to "throwing" a phone?
Does it apply to "dialing" a phone?

Anonymous said...

Bryce went ballistic.

Did Bryce squirm/jerk/throw himself out of a hold that wasn't secure enough, and accidentally fall?

Is "went" intentionally passive to conceal responsibility of Bryce being thrown?

Hey Jude said...

I was envisaging her holding her dead baby with what she said she said - It's like she was lecturing the baby on his being dead. I know parents often try to find a purpose in the death of a child, but at such an early stage, I think it would be more expected for her to say she was sorry she forgot about him:

'Unlike some parents I was absolutely blessed to have the opportunity to hold my son one last time and tell him goodbye, and I made a promise to him that no matter how painful it would be to go through my story over and over and over again if just one parent listens and understood about the dangers and educated themselves and took the prevention measures for vehicles ... his death would be worth it.
It would be worth losing a child to save 100'.

Is that later editing, or did she really tell her baby 'his death would be worth it, it would be worth losing a child to save 100.'? I can't believe she said that, at least not at the time.

It reminds me of Gerry McCann saying, "It could have been worse - we could have lost the twins as well." - a similar throw away remark on the value of a child's life.

Hey Jude said...

I would like to know what is the significance of 'attention seeking' in SA?

It sounds like a moral judgement, and as if attention seeking is, of itself, to be viewed as a bad thing - that is how I mostly understand the term 'attention-seeking' - as an accusation - or is that just my perception?

As attention-seeking is often positive, and as everyone seeks attention in one way or another, and as receiving attention is basic to most people's needs, why (if it is) is it a negative in SA?

Or is it not always a negative, more that the cases more often concern negative or unhealthy types of attention-seeking?

Cindy said...

Did you guys hear about the Texas Mom who intentionally left her 2 yr old daughter (along with her 9 mos old son) in a hot car to "teach her a lesson"? Those are the types of sick people who should be forcibly sterilized. Initially she told investigators that her kids "locked themselves in the car".

Bobcat said...

"but it just wasn't sitting as secure as we felt it should be

"it" is Bryce.
"we" indicates togetherness between mom and dad

Imo, Bryce was deceased and too limp to sit up in a larger car seat, so they put him in the older one - likely a baby carrier which cradles a smaller body. The parents wanted him cradled securely and not flopping around in the bigger seat.

Hey Jude said...

Is it interesting as to why/how the baby had been in a seat described as 'spare' as opposed to his seat, or his new car seat if he grew out of the old one. That seems odd - how is their baby in a 'spare' seat until they decide to put him back in his own old seat? Is it that his regular own seat is usually in the father's car, which her sister has that week, and they left It in the father's car? For all the detail about car seats, she omits to say if that was why he was in a 'spare' seat until that day when they put him back in his old seat - so maybe that was not the reason, as it would be so simple to say his regular seat was still in the other car. How is it called a spare seat rather than his seat, if he had been using it for some days, would it not be 'his' by then, rather than still called 'spare'?

A 'ballistic' baby is a couple of hours later 'ljust very lethargic', yet she is more concerned about how the car seat fits than her 'just very lethargic' baby - she would know he needed to be seen by a doctor, at the least she would discuss his sickness with the childminder, ask for updates, check her phone, think how he might be and know she may need to leave work early to take him to the doctor? Expected she would check her phone and expect updates.

Is it possible she ignored the message because she did not want to have to leave work early to attend to him?

She says her 'area of responsibility' was her work.

Is there a reason why she needs to say 'accidentally' and more than once - one would assume that was the case. Might she say that because she believed some were not convinced she accidentally left the baby - it seems an unnecessary word.

I think there is quite a lot which might not add up. Her account of the condition in which she found the baby is lacking. She doesn't say he was hot, soaked in perspiration, etc. I might also suspect he had already died were it not that an autopsy would show the cause of death had been overhearing?

Hey Jude said...


Anonymous said...

I was wrong above. The car did get very hot inside, but I also think he may have been already unresponsive.

"Medical examiner Kevin Whaley performed the autopsy on Bryce, and said he died from hyperthermia, most likely in the first half of the day. The infant had marked dehydration, and his core temperature when he was taken to the hospital was 110 degrees."

Horse Chestnut said...

I agree with everything you just said.

Anonymous said...


Just before the tragedy, she had two dreams that seem to her, in retrospect, like foreboding. In one, she accidentally drowned Bryce; in the other, it was death by fire. Balfour believes these dreams were sent by God to help prepare her for what she was about to endure.

Whitney said, “No Lyn you didn’t drop him off this morning.” As she said it for the second time, it began to sink in that she was saying I had FORGOTTEN to drop him off.

When Jarrett arrived at hospital, I was hysterical. I said I was sorry. He was shouting, "I don't want to see her tears." But when it sank in, he didn't blame me.

What Zwerling did was play two audiotapes for the jury. One was Balfour’s interrogation by police in the hospital about an hour after Bryce’s death; her answers are immeasurably sad, almost unintelligible, half sob, half whisper: “I killed my baby,” she says tremulously. “Oh, God, I’m so sorry.”

Alex said...

"But for me, when I got out of the car that day, my son was exactly where he was supposed to be."

This is the statement that jumped out at me.


Anonymous said...

Fascinating Alex. Thanks for sharing dude!

Chris said...

She was supposed to take the new carseat to "like, a firehouse or something" during her lunch hour to get it properly installed. I guess she forgot about that, too.
She spends too much time trying to Convince, even 10 years after the fact.

Hey Jude said...

The story about the spare car seat seems basically irrelevant as the baby was not in it and she did not go to have it correctly fitted - it only would be relevant if she discovered the baby when going to the firehouse, or if it was the sight of the empty baby seat in the rear view mirror which had made her think he was not in the car. She didn’t take the seat for fitting, and she does not say she looked in the rear view mirror and saw the empty seat.

‘That particular day, he said, "When are you going to get the car seat put in?" I said, "Put it in the car today, and I will go to like the fire department and get them to put it in correctly at lunch time."
He put the spare car seat in the car behind the front passenger seat in my field of view, and that car seat was empty. The other car seat, which is the car seat Bryce was in, when he put him in he put it behind my seat, the driver's seat.’

Why was Bryce’s seat placed outside of the driver’s field of view? It sounds as if he was not already in the seat - the spare seat was placed first, in the driver’s field of view - (was that intentional? She makes it sound that way) - and Bryce’s seat placed behind the driver’s seat. You’d particularly want to keep an eye on a ‘just very lethargic’ baby - it sounds as if they went to efforts to put a spare seat in the driver’s field of view on that particular day.

Hey Jude said...

Assuming Bryce was alive when left in the car:

The mother says it was cold and it was cool, that it was 39 degrees - had she convinced herself that it was safe to leave him in the car, but as it turned out "It was too hot for the child to be in the car, obviously." I wonder if maybe she had left him intentionally and it had not been obvious to her at the time that the car would heat up as it did. If she ignored the call because she didn't want the childminder to know she was at work, rather than taking the baby to the doctor, and would not be willing to admit she knowingly left the sick baby alone in the car (if she did). It is concerning that she had it in mind only to take the car seat to the fire house at lunchtime (yet did not - the baby may have been found alive if she had) rather than take the baby to a doctor.

Hey Jude said...

Was it really the car seat, or was it the 'just very lethargic' baby she intended to take to the firehouse - was it staged that she 'discovered' him overheated in the car? Could he have died at home earlier that morning and did overheating in a hot car disguise a week of neglect of the 'really fussy' baby with a ‘bad head cold’? I find the spare car seat saga followed by not taking it to the firehouse interesting for the attention she gives it - she seems more interested in the car seats than in her baby, which is probably unexpected.

If she went into work ‘like normal’ that means something was not like normal - was it that she knew her baby was in the car?

Lettice said...

My parents in law lost their first born son 51 years ago. He was two years old, and drowned in a small puddle of water outside the new home. The lawn was not in place, due to all the tractors that had been there, and the baby found some water to play in. To this day, at the age of 78, my mother in law still blames herself for his death.

She is a wonderful human being, who is a beloved nana to our four children.

Chris said...

I wonder if there were any signs of Shaken Baby syndrome from the previous Fussy night?
A 'head cold' is unlikely to cause lethargy. Bryce didn't make a peep during the car ride, causing me to think there was some injury caused during the early morning when Bryce 'went ballistic'. The parents shared responsibility (we) when the father "agreed" to take a turn in the nursery.
She offers a detailed explanation for Every aspect that caused her to forget the baby - amount of sleep, sick baby, 2 vehicles, 2 carseats, 2 phones, work responsibilities, etc.
Methinks she doth protest too much.....

Hey Jude said...

I wonder if the reason the spare car seat story was introduced was in order to account for an overheard statement, spoken outside. She says before she came outside they had been talking about a spare car seat. She doesn’t say what, if anything, was said outside, but the last part of the conversation was that she would go to ‘like the fire department or something’ at lunchtime.

Why the need to say ‘before I came outside’ - why any of it?

I think it interesting she says that she said, ‘like the fire department or something’ because there is not a vague something which is like the fire department. So, is she pretending vagueness there - was she more likely to have straightforwardly said she would go to the fire department at lunchtime - and that was overheard?

What she said she said is:
"Put it in the car today, and I will go to like the fire department and get them to put it in correctly at lunch time."

I think it unlikely she said it like that, because there are not too many random like places which are like the fire department.

It is as if she is trying to make casual part of a statement which was not so casual? I think she did say she would go to the fire department at lunchtime, but maybe not the rest of it. Then did not go - could that be because she believed she had been overheard - it would cause much suspicion for her to drive her dead baby to the fire department at lunchtime, if someone had hours earlier heard her saying she would be going there. She had to think of a reason why she said she would go there, and a 'spare' car seat, which she had been talking about before she came outside (need to explain) was the alternative reason to go there? She didn't go - was it not the real reason she had intended to go there?

^These are wonderings rather than assertions.

Hey Jude said...

Correction : 'like the fire department ' - not - 'like the fire department or something' .

TiffGGGG said...

I remember hearing about this woman's story, but this is the first I've ever heard/read her talk about what happened. And, oh my, what a doozy!

I am a mom, and busy, and stressed and tired, at that. So, I get it. I have a "fussy" boy, who gets that way while teething or while going through a growth spurt. I know what it's like night after night having to spend 2+ hours putting him back to sleep. I know. I get it. HOWEVER...

My sister has daycare kids (I stay at home).She will tell you readily that if daycare calls her while at work, she immediately answers and calls back, because that means something is wrong with the child. IE, could have a fever and needs to be picked up by a parent. She would never, ever ignore that call.

I agree with HEYJUDE that it sounds like this mother was not bonded to this boy at all. It is so very sad. Not once does she say she's even sorry for what happened b/c of her negligence. In fact, she cites a similar example of a mother doing the very same thing she did and says, basically, that that woman had no excuse.But she does. She has a lot of excuses. She doesn't take any responsibility, and she's gotten away with it!

I also found it deeply concerning that the child was "very lethargic" and "very tired" (in the same sentence!) before they ever left the house. I know after sleepless nights, my son gets crankier...louder...fussier from lack of sleep. Something about the lethargic term reminds me of the McCanns. Wasn't Maddy also just lethargic and "so tired"??

A few things I noticed from her interview:

1. "particular" used 4 times.

2. Immediate disparagement of the child being "ballistic" and "really fussy".

3. "That final night" ... Not 'that final DAY', when he actually died. But that night. Something bad happened that night when the kid went 'ballistic' IMO.

4. Sensitive information regarding the car seat and spare car seat. This doesn't even make sense the way she's telling it. She's leaving something out, IMO.

5. As a parent, I call BS that neither parent were concerned or aware that the child was unresponsive that morning during the drive (no cooing, babbling, etc.) BS!!

My question: did they not have those MIRRORS that most parents drive with so they can SEE into the backseat to see the face of their child? I have 2 babies, both have one. They sell them for less than $15 at any Walmart.

6. The use of the word "normally" is a red flag, of course. Used something like 3 times in her answer.

7. Incomplete sentence: "In my mind, I'd already made a stop, baby's dropped off." Strange wording when I read it, like her thoughts are jumping from one thing to the next and leaving information out.

"I got to work"
"Before I got to work"
"I got ahold of"
and yet....
"I get a phone call about 10:30"....

I believe her, too. She got that phone call and saw it on her phone at 10:30, but knew she needed to wait for the day to finish getting hotter. So, she couldn't answer that call yet. Not yet...

The babysitter had more concern for this child than her own mother. SO SAD!!

For all the convincing this mother tried to do, I don't buy it. She wanted her kid dead, IMO, and did nothing to stop it.

No grief from this mother. It's all about her, not mention of the pain and screaming her boy would have endured while in that car alone and dying (if he was ever alive in that car seat to begin with). Maybe they doped him on sleep medicine and then left him in there.

And she's totally OK with losing this child...hers because it might save 100. Ridiculous...So absurd. That poor baby.

TiffGGGG said...

She says it all.

"I don't feel like I need to forgive myself. I do acknowledge and have to deal with the responsibility of forgetting my son."

Because she didn't do anything wrong, folks. It's only bad if she did it "intentionally."

"My son was exactly where he was supposed to be" that day. Left in the car, dead or almost soon-to-be dead. Because she knew he was going to die that day. He was where he was supposed to be.

This makes me sick to read.

It sucks. It sucks every day.

It also sucks to have a selfish, irresponsible mother who doesn't love you enough to want to protect you.

Heartbreaking story. RIP Bryce.

Hey Jude said...

Anon - I think she had only Bryce and a fourteen year old son at the time Bryce died. She says her fourteen year old lost his only sibling. I think the other children came later.

Hey Jude said...

Well, I have been puzzling over the car seats, too.

It is strange there was only a ‘spare’ car seat, which was in use, and his ‘old’ car seat which was presumably out of use till that day - or listener is meant to think so?

If the spare seat was spare, it was not his, if it was his it was not spare. He had been in it for two weeks, yet it was still termed ‘spare’ rather than his. I think that is unexpected, and it would be called his seat, or maybe the baby-seat, once he had used it a couple of times - once in use it would no longer have been called ‘spare’, no longer being spare.

Does anyone call a baby car seat ‘spare’ while it is in use? Driver, passenger, baby, child, or the names of whoever usually sits in them - in family cars, the seats are usually associated with their occupants.

Where was his regular car seat - she does not say it was left in the father’s car. He had been in the ‘spare’ seat for two weeks. The father’s car had been in use for one week by the sister. Either he would have had a seat from the father’s car for one week or less, from the sister, or not had it, if it was left in the father’s car. If there was a seat in that car, the mother does not say, but if there was, would that be called ‘spare’? I would think more likely his ‘other’ or ‘second’ seat, even if not in much use - only an out of use, not in the car, seat is ‘spare’? How was the spare seat still ‘spare’ if the baby had no other regular seat - he had the spare seat and there was his old seat, which speaks to a new seat, of which there is no mention?

Was it that the ‘spare’ seat was used mainly in the home rather than in the car, making it ‘spare’ in relation to the car, though not to the baby, as he had been ‘in it for two weeks’? “Put it in the car today”...other days it was in use, but not in the car? I can’t think how else the seat could be ‘spare’ while also he was using it, unless it was considered spare to the car - for two weeks it was in use, elsewhere to the car.

Was the ‘spare’ seat intended as a new one for the car, but had mostly not been used in the car?

Hey Jude said...

I think babies do not ‘go ballistic’ (it sounds intentional, ballistic) - the word might suggest projectile vomiting or a nappy explosion of diahorrea? The poor baby was very out of sorts, by the mother’s account.

I wonder did the baby die in the house, in a car seat, and they moved him into the car?

There is a lot about the car seat, which he both used and yet was spare to the car. It was not spare though as he was ‘in it for two weeks’, she said, yet she wants also for people to accept it was spare, which suggests it was not being in any way used, which is a contradiction.

The mother said the father could not find the pacifier ‘in his bed’ - I don’t know if those are extra words - does she draw unnecessary attention to the baby’s bed? Was the baby put to bed, or put back into his bed, that night? Was he not? Does the mother want to suggest he was by saying the father looked ‘in the bed’ for the pacifier? (I know I might be seeing things which are not there, yes.)

The father got the baby ready that day. Is it possible as they both were tired, and having, whichever, cleaned up the ‘ballistic’ baby, he dressed him for the day and rather than put him back to his bed, put him in his ‘spare’ car seat, all ready for daycare, hoping he would sleep for a while, so they could sleep longer and get ready for the day undisturbed? She said she slept longer that day than she should have - so I wonder - because she was so tired, or because she didn’t have to get the baby ready for daycare? I wonder did they put the ‘just very lethargic’ baby in his ‘spare’ seat into the back of the car, then move him out of the mother’s field of view, into his ‘old’ seat?

Was his ‘old’ seat actually his regular seat? I think from the description, his old seat was not where it usually was, which makes me think it was actually his regular seat. Well, there are only two seats in the story, and only one seems to belong in the car, to him. I think the ‘spare’ seat may have been used to contain him in the house, and the mother, wishing to avoid that anyone might consider that a possibility, dismisses the significance of that seat as ‘spare’. It would be very sensitive if some of what I am thinking is right - there is no good reason to use a baby car seat outside of a car, except possibly in very bad weather conditions. IMO.

He was nine months old, ‘in it for two weeks’ - it was not ‘spare’, yet also not his car seat.

Probably around now someone says, ‘Yeah,save your breath - it was loaned her by the childminder when the baby was sick in his seat one day’…which could be the case, though I would expect her to have had it fitted while she used it, and to have returned it within two weeks.


Please, anyone, tell me if I am way off having said anything reasonable.

Hey Jude said...

I am thinking the baby possibly suffocated in the car seat, during the night/early morning - the mother said he was not able to use his pacifier because he could not suck and breathe at the same time - he had a bad head cold. He most likely was suffering from congestion. Perhaps they thought he would be less fractious and breathe easier if they put him upright in a car seat to sleep, unaware of the danger of babies suffocating in car seats. I don't know if nine month olds ever or sometimes suffocate in car seats but it could be he could have got stuck in an uncomfortable position which further restricted his airways. IDK, but the spare seat is sensitive and early in the story for a seat which, if it was just 'spare', did not seem even to need mentioning.

Bobcat said...

I think the sensitivity regarding the car seat is because they moved Bryce's lifeless dying/deceased? body from one to the other.

Byrce had grown enough to sit in the larger car seat for the past few weeks.
They put his limp body in the bigger car seat that morning, but he wasn't sitting securely enough in it.
They put him in the smaller car seat so he would be cradled in a natural position.

The car seat description is a lengthy hina clause.

Anonymous said...

From July 2016: She has come up with something else to blame, an unreported rape by an unknown fellow service member that she told no one about for ten years. The article says in one place it happened in 2004 and in another that it happened the year before Bryce's birth, which would have been 2006.

"From going through the counseling now to see the way that things are connected and that is very possibly the cause of why I forgot (Bryce) that day. It’s very hard to deal with,” Lyn added.

I'm not saying it didn't happen, but it gets Lyn back in the limelight ten years later and makes a much more sensational, self-blame-free story than "Oops! My bad.") Also puts the military on the hook for a service-related medical disability.

Anonymous said...

Forgot to include in the above: Lyn said she believed her son's death could have been prevented had she been in treatment.

trustmeigetit said...


Aramazd Andressian Has been arrested for murdering his son. He then was laughing and cracking jokes to the judge they are reporting.

This is frightening.

Anonymous said...

Obviously my reading and interpreting skills aren't up to par for this blog, therefore my post was deleted.

"What time did he die?"

"I don't know."

Okay, here's a clue: after being pulled from the hot car and after arriving at the hospital.

TiffGGGG said...

@BOBCATBlogger Bobcat said...
"Here the subject tells us
1. Where she wasn't
2. Where her phone was
3. The physical action of pulling out the phone"

What is the significance of "where" her phone was, and the "physical action of pulling out" the phone that indicates deception?

Does this also apply to "throwing" a phone?
Does it apply to "dialing" a phone?

June 26, 2017 at 2:15 PM

I had taken her describing pulling her phone out of her purse as another excuse--she'd missed the call b/c her phone wasn't on her desk where she'd been working so she could see it. She'd left it in her purse, which gives her another excuse as to why she was negligent with her child.

Anonymous said...

It was the other car seat

Anonymous said...

Good grief, overthink, hyperanalyze and overspeculate much? I think the woman is batcrao crazy but wth? I would say spare seat if my daughter was in a seat not generally used. I want to like this site bit the over the top freaking speculation makes it ridiculous

Anonymous said...

Sorry, Bobcat, the overspeculating post was supposed to be to Hey Jude

Anonymous said...


The article below is from a youtuber who is gaining prominence and emerging as a voice of authority for climate change advocates.

Although, I would love for Peter to analyze this article based on this man's statement in 2010, I appreciate he's a busy man, so I'd also appreciate any input from other users as well.

Let me know your thoughts.


Anonymous said...

"I can manage $47 million for the US military, with every penny accounted for, and I was awarded a Bronze Star for those efforts, but how can i forget my kid? ...,

bullshit - the Bronze Star is awarded for heroism


Hey Jude said...

I am interested in why she chose to say it was spare rather than his, new or other, which I think are more likely than spare. What is the point of a spare car seat, why would she call it 'spare' when she also said he was using it? It wasn't quite 'spare', so is there deception round it? Well, never mind. Never mind she didn't take it to be fitted either, after all that fuss.

Trudy said...

I found it unexpected that she doesn't mention feeding the baby that morning.

Melody said...

The 'spare' car seat might be the one they took out of husband's car while it was in the repair shop. The seats are fitted on a base, which is properly installed in a specific car.
If they took the seat from husbands car, the base for that seat would need to be installed and securely adjusted in her car.
I believe something happened on that 'final' night during the struggle to get Bryce back to sleep at the time of the 'ballistic' episode, causing the baby to become lethargic and in the process of dying on the car ride to work.
Mom's story is too practiced, with too much practiced detail. That baby was forgotten on purpose to cover up the injuries he suffered the night before.

Anonymous said...

The spare seat could have been one that was not semi-permanently anchored into either her or her husband's car, that was available for the daycare lady's use, other relatives, etc. She mentioned that one of the reasons for the crossed calls was that the daycare woman had taken the kids she watched to to McDonald's that afternoon.

I still think she oversold the combination of that empty spare seat happening to be visible in the passenger side rear and the abnormal quietness of the baby that day that both parents noticed (but failed to be concerned about).

Dehydration was cited as a cause of death and a baby that is too congested to suck a pacifier also has great difficulty drinking anything from a bottle. If the baby had been sick for three nights, it could have already been significantly dehydrated by that morning. It can happening quickly in small bodies, especially when crying alot and maybe running a slight fever from infection.

But I am a robot! said...

I see scary parallels between this woman and the sociopathic Michelle Carter, who badgered her suicidal boyfriend to get back into his toxic fume filled truck and continue his suicide, while simultaneously telling friends she mourned his death and wanted to be some nationally known advocate helping suicidal teens, making her boyfriend's death mean something, etc.

This woman seemed all too eager and ready to immediately be the national tragic face for forgotten,tortured baked children in cars. Which too many seem to be intentional these days. The comment about saving a hundred kids making her helpless child's death "worth it" is bone-chilling, all the more so coming from the poor baby's own mother, and so soon after it happened.

Anonymous said...

"The reality is our brains don't differentiate between a child, a purse, a cellphone, a pair of glasses. It doesn't matter."

The fact that a mother who has been the cause of her own child's death, however inadvertently (or not), could ever compare forgetting a child in a car to misplacing a pair of glasses makes my skin crawl.

She is utterly remorseless. I guess the fact that she goes on and on about not needing to be forgiven because there is nothing forgive backs that up. Heartless.

But I am a robot! said...

Quoting one of a million random Anonymous who won't just pick a name to cut some confusion:

[i]"From July 2016: She has come up with something else to blame, an unreported rape by an unknown fellow service member that she told no one about for ten years. "[/i]

Huh?!?! The first 60 excuses she pulls out of ... well, never mind where ... don't make her look bad enough, she needs one more random, completely unrelated one with inconsistent details to really weaken it?

Hey Jude said...

Melody - The husband's car was not in the repair shop - the sister's car was in the repair shop, and the husband loaned his car to the sister for that week, as it was he who caused the damage to her car. The mother does not say the seat was from his car, just that it was 'spare'.
If it was normally in his car it would be his 'other' seat, rather than 'spare' - well, I think thar more likely.

Trudy - she said the baby normally was fed his first bottle at the sitter's house.

'What I have to come to terms with, and this is what is really hard for me -- because my son usually took his first bottle in the morning at the babysitter's. Because it was so cool that morning, at some point at time he woke up because he was hungry and was in the car by himself. That's what I have to deal with -- not being there for him. There's nothing to forgive, but I will be accountable, I am absolutely accountable for his death. That's what I have to deal with. Can you say that that's forgiveness or not forgiveness? I don't really know. But for me the problem is that I should have been the type of parent that knew about these dangers and made sure there were steps in place to prevent that. It sucks. It sucks every day. It's something that you have to live with. I'm accountable every day. I miss him every day. He would be 8 years old today. I'll never see him grow up. I'll never see him graduate from school. I'll never see his children.'


It's all about her - her son will never see himself grow up either. Harsh, maybe but she does go on about herself a lot -death by hot car must have been horrendous for the baby. There doesn't seem much sympathy or sorrow for what the baby went through. Not sure she has convinced everyone that he was not already dead or unconscious when they put him in the car.

Anonymous said...

I'm the anon with the rape comment. Sorry, first time poster who is insecure about lack of SA skills. But I can recognize big, fat lies sometimes...

The article about the rape and subsequent PTSD is from July 25, 2016 on WTVR. It's just more of the same blame, brag, and lie, really.

She describes the rape as follows: "Someone broke into my room and in the middle of the night it was pitch black and he assaulted me, he raped me," Lyn said. "I just remember waking up and I couldn’t breathe. This happened from someone who was on my team. This happened from somebody who was supposed to be able to protect my back and they didn’t."

Would not being able to breathe be the main thing that caused you to wake and that you would remember if a man was on top of you assaulting you?

She toots her horn a bit, again. "My son was gone and he was lost because I forgot him," she said. "How can you forget your own child? I thought to myself of all the things I did in Iraq and all of the accomplishments, how can I forget my own child?"

And Balfour was named the Washington D.C. Director of VetREST, a non-profit that helps vets dealing with PTSD. Perhaps the whole deal with Bryce was starting to get boring or feel a little thankless, by this point, or maybe just another good thing making this poor baby's death even more worthwhile?


Karen said...

Im new here and the subject matter is complex so I am learning in small nuggets per day. I appreciate so much how well the blog commenters break down each part of an analysis even if there are small squabbles it is still amazing for learning.

William said...

Welcome Karen. It's normal to struggle with analysis especially the finer points. The blog commenters tend to be both helpful and a hindrance in certain regards, the important thing is to take baby steps on your learning path. That is how we learn. We first crawl, then take a baby step, before you know it you are running confidently! Please stick with it!

Trudy said...

Thanks Hey Jude. She doesn't mention breast feeding or giving him a bottle during the long, difficult night, or whether his illness affected his appetite. As @9:24 says, a baby who is too congested to suck a pacifier, is likely to struggle with a bottle of milk. It's horrible that dehydration was cited as a cause of death.

Balfour says of her husband "That for me was the most telling part of it, that he forgave me". Yet she says she doesn't feel the need to forgive herself. IDK. It seems contradictory.

After she dropped her husband off, (did he look at, touch, kiss or speak to his infant son as he left the car?) and presumably was on the way to day care) she received a phone call. It is at this point in her narrative- between dropping off her husband and receiving a phone call - that she dropped the baby at daycare "in my mind". This is the part that Peter noted was slowing down her, already slow, narrative with irrelevant details. The phone call, which caused her to forget her baby, is remembered in great detail. That's a helluva selective memory. She can even remember word for word what she said in phone calls precipitated by and subsequent to the first phone call. I notice that she seeks to emotionally manipulate her audience by saying that the phone calls, which wiped her baby from her mind, were to do with her efforts in "honouring a fallen soldier".
Re: the car seats. It does seem odd. If the spare seat was from the husbands car, what was the point of removing it while the sister drove the car? But more importantly, why did the spare seat get placed in the optimum position in Lynne's car? Why wasn't Bryce's regular car seat in the optimum position? IIRC Ross Harris used a similar excuse about backward or forward facing seats for leaving his poor baby to die in a car.

Anonymous said...

Within the analysis, why is some of the writing so small it requires a magnifying glass? Tia

Anonymous said...

I'm just beginning to read through the analysis, and Im already getting linguistic indicators that baby Bryce may have been dead before he was put in his car seat.

Anonymous said...

Very lethargic, too tired, not being normal= He was already dead before the car seat fiasco.

It's really the same thing as the McCann case--what does the mother say she was so tired leaning on her knee in the car= at that point she was already dead

Blackburn case= Davey "finds" Amanda bent over in surrender beside the bed, asked her what's wrong, etc= she was already dead

This is such a recurring pattern as a linguistic indicator.

Valerie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Would her military training affect the analysis? My Dad was career Navy and the language and thought process can be a little different.

Henry said...

People from the Navy have different linguistics that is correct.

Christy said...

Tiffany and Hey Jude and Anonymous posting @ the rape, your comments are so enlightening, thank you. I agree that she wasn't bonded but I don't think she did this on purpose. Her shitty excuses and forgiveness of herself are more than troubling and I'm shocked that she was not found guilty of a crime. Interesting that in 2016 she came out with yet another reason that Bryce died. She never once has mentioned what that poor sweet boy suffered through, it is so sad. RIP sweet baby.

Hey Jude said...

Anon at 2.20 - I think the mother is trying to say that she did not 'let' him bake to death in a hot car because she was not aware he was in the car - therefore she did not 'do that' - there is nothing for which to forgive herself as she did not know he was in the car. She feels responsible because she should have remembered he was in the car. It is that she associates forgiveness with wrongdoing, and does not feel the need to forgive herself as she says she did not intentionally leave him in the car - she stresses he was accidentally left in the car. I am confused by her ability to separate responsibility for his death from lack of guilt, which I take her to not feel, as she finds no need for forgiveness. I think even if she left him unintentionally (of which I am not convinced) the sense of guilt would be overwhelming. It may be she is able to speak as she does, and not take true responsibility because she did not bond with her baby.

Say, she did leave him by accident - she had all day, phone calls, thoughts of a sick baby, to prompt her memory, or if not her memory, then to call the childminder to see how her baby was doing and to know he was not there. She did not do that - she had all day, and calls from the childminder. At some point during the day, most likely the morning, she would/should have known her baby was still in the car. If genuinely she did not know at the start of the day, there was much opportunity to remember or find out during the day.

Hey Jude said...

Anon at 2.20

Peter wrote:

I got to work, got out of the car and went into work like normal...

The subject wishes to portray this as normal; a signal that she knows it was anything but normal. It is not that leaving a baby is "normal" that is conquering:

It is the need to convince the audience of such that is a red flag.


^ I think 'conquering' is meant to read 'concerning'?

Hey Jude said...

I think more expected in the circumstances would be that she would castigate herself for her irresponsibility in not having called to check that the baby had taken his first bottle that morning, and was settled rather than going 'ballistic' . It is not only that he was left in the car, but also that she did not check on him, or respond to calls, which considering he was 'just very lethargic' and had gone 'ballistic' in the night, and was so blocked up he could not comfort himself with his pacifier - welll, how is that not distressing to her - how does she not find anything to forgive herself for in the knowledge that making or taking a morning phone call or message might have prevented his death?

It is as though she wants people to believe her 'responsibility' ended with forgetting him in the car - when it continued into, and increased throughout the work day. She must have had thoughts of her baby being unwell, that she needed to make a doctor appointment, at least to check with the childminder how he was doing - on that particular day, even if she had forgotten he was in the car, his condition should have been of enough concern that she made sure to have had some contact with the childminder. She does not blame herself or take true responsibility, she prefers to blame others.

The baby was 'just very lethargic' - I think a childminder would decline to accept responsibility for a 'just very lethargic baby', and would advise he be taken to a doctor instead, which is maybe why he did not get taken to the childminder that 'particular' day?
I wonder if her priorities were skewed to the extent that she thought to leave him in the car because he was too ill for the childminder but she had to go to work, her 'area of responsibility', rather than stay home with her baby and take him to a doctor - nine months old, lethargy is a concern in young babies, I think 'very lethargic' without a known cause would look like an emergency to most parents.

- 'he was not being normal.' Like he should have been 'being' normal.

Is that like saying:

He was not being well.

It sounds as if she is saying it was somehow intentional of the baby to not be 'normal'.

The father thought the just very lethargic baby was well enough for the childminder, too. I wonder why the father did not make or answer any calls through the day either - why did neither parent call the childminder, or the other, to ask how he was doing? I wonder if the childminder called and messaged the father when she could not get the mother, as she had all their contact details. Perhaps the father was only to be contacted in an emergency - the childminder would not have any reason to think the mother didn't just stay home with the baby.

Hey Jude said...

I think I should be using ‘babysitter’ rather than ‘childminder’, as that is the mother’s term. Here a babysitter is more usually a casual arrangement, someone who looks after children for a short time, while a childminder is registered for daycare, usually for children of working mothers.

If I paid more attention the first couple of times, I would have seen that first she was dropping the baby off, with no mention of to whom; next she would normally drop him off ‘to daycare’; ‘the babysitter’ calls her around 10.30, after which the babysitter is referred to many times as ‘she’, until the mother says, ‘the baby normally took his first bottle at the babysitter’s’ - it is interesting she said, rather than the babysitter gave or fed him his first bottle, that he was at the babysitter’s house when he ‘took his first bottle’. Maybe she did not care much for the babysitter either… I notice, when a mother likes a babysitter or childminder, she might say ‘my babysitter/childminder’ or ‘[baby’s name’s] babysitter/childminder. Bryce’s mother distances herself, but also Bryce, from his babysitter, assuming no bond for him with her? - he is dropped off to daycare and takes his first bottle at the babysitter’s house. The babysitter only becomes a person to either of them when she makes a call around 10.30., which contact is avoided. Bryce’s babysitter does not have a name, but it is included that she gave Lyn her name.


I see the Anon comment I was responding to in my earlier comments is no longer there. I have been writing off-line - should have scrolled up before posting. :-/

Hey Jude said...

The mother said she had to get up early to get ready for work. I do wonder if they had the baby all set to go for the day in the car seat hours before they needed to leave, had put him in the seat rather than to bed, and if they hoped he would stay asleep, until he was dropped off to the babysitter. Well, it doesn't sound as if she was thinking of spending much, or any, time attending to him when she got up - she also slept in that morning. Did she do that because she knew she didn't need to also get the baby ready? He regularly did not have his first bottle from his mother - his feeding routine was arranged that way, so perhaps there were other routines, or occasions, of avoidance. She says the father got him ready that day, but she doesn't actually say when, or how, he got him ready, just 'he went to get in the vehicle' - which makes me wonder if 'getting him ready' had only involved taking the baby and his things to the car. He put in the 'spare' car seat - was Bryce already in the seat, and then was moved out of the mother's field of view, into his 'old' seat, which had also been moved out of sight?


Why did she say he was hooked in, and she unhooked him? - it's obvious he would still be hooked in, and that she would have unhooked him to get him out of the seat. If it is not a regular phrase, I would wonder if his clothing maybe had got hooked/caught up in the fastenings and that he had suffocated. I wonder that anyway, just would think it very likely if hooked is not a baby car seat term.

Is 'hooked in' a regular term? Here it is 'fastened in' or 'strapped in' . Except in this account, I have not heard the term 'hooked' used in relation to a baby in a car seat.

Anonymous said...

The point of this blog is to Learn how to analyze the words a person uses in order to verify if they are truthful.
If you think this is all contrived and unnecessary, then why are you still here?

Hey Jude said...

Anon, what annoys me about the mother is her campaigning and advertising how she didn't care for her baby, while also saying what a great mother she is - it's upsetting, on account of the baby, whom she portrayed as neglected while he was in distress, and who then died. She told him his death would be 'worth it'. Worth what? There is no tangible 'it' - no measure of what that 'worth' of his dying might be. Everyone already knows not to leave a baby in a car. If she didn't say his death was worth it, when there is not even an 'it', then, I probably would not have commented and just felt sad the baby had died, and for her, because she had not bonded with him. What is the 'it'? - perhaps, she claims a success for 'it' every time a baby does not die in a hot car.

Tania Cadogan said...

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"I can manage $47 million for the US military, with every penny accounted for, and I was awarded a Bronze Star for those efforts, but how can i forget my kid? ...,

bullshit - the Bronze Star is awarded for heroism


The Bronze Star Medal, unofficially the Bronze Star, is a United States decoration awarded to members of the United States Armed Forces for either heroic achievement, heroic service, meritorious achievement, or meritorious service in a combat zone.

Anonymous said...

I can tell she is lying-not from the experimental memory language- but by her reliance on blaming others and things and touting her military medal and experience.

She demonstrated her disdain for anyone questioning her authority when she described the babysitter she was talking to on the phone as "turning around."

That's neither here nor there; it's up to the state to provide proof of guilt. They did not.

She gets involved with these seminars because that's what they do; it's who they are.

Amazingly, she compares herself with NASA personnel, professors, and doctors though her language does not reflect same education.

It's the same system that is taught here. Same type training.

Will she admit she was wrong? NO. N.O.
Why not?

ima.grandma said...

the following site has several comments  written by the babysitter (Whitney Perkins) and coworkers of Lynn. An example:

Co-worker#2 April 11th, 2007 | 1:30pm
I think it is pretty interesting for the people that know Lyn to act surprised. As if she wasn't tugged in many directions and at times acted spacey.
Yes, she is a great person but many things slipped her mind because she was so busy.
Can we just think about Bryce for a second? Strapped in a car seat and helpless all day?
Can we stop and think why she "thought that she had dropped him off"? Was it the fact that she was on the cell phone with an important office call that distracted her because they needed her in the office ASAP?
Cell phones are big distractions while driving and again if you know Lyn, you know her cell phone rings non stop. There is so much to this story that won't ever be said because of the place she worked so that makes people come up with their own story.

I was driving my child to day care the other morning and I got a call from the office that distracted me and I passed right by the day care. Thank God my child was old enough to say "Mommy, what about me?"
Would I have gotten to work and worked all day and not thought twice about my child?? I shiver to think of what Lyn is going through. I know she loved her precious baby boy Bryce. There is no doubt in my mind.
Lyn will need special help after all is said and done and my prayers are with her.

Sus said...

Oh Imagrandma, how delightful to see you! How are all your physical ailments?

Ally said...

Anon, I think you mean "experiential" not "experimental". It's always nice not to litter your writing with incorrect word usage.

Anonymous said...

Tucker Carlson w/Sharyl Atkkison said nobody's held accountable for lying. And he cites the lies about 'WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION'.

T said...

Here is our story. On that fateful morning, Bryce was really tired, Jarrett and I both were. Bryce had a bad cold and was restless and coughing all week, but that Friday morning he was especially lethargic because he had been up all night coughing, stuffed up and miserable. I was exhausted, long days at work along with sleepless nights. I was severely sleep deprived, but as Jarrett shook me for the second time to tell me it was time to get up I finally just said in my mind, if I can just make it through today, I can rest this weekend. As Jarrett got Bryce ready for the day, he dressed him warmly as it was March and had been pretty cool in the mornings for Virginia.

Jarrett and I had had a crazy week; my sister Tina had been borrowing his car as hers was in the shop and so I had been dropping him off, first then Bryce which was not my normal routine. When he brought Bryce downstairs he looked tired and sleepy. I can’t remember if I kissed him that morning. It is a memory that I regret every day. As we were about to leave out of our home, Jarrett started asking when we were going to get Bryce’s new car seat put in by the fire department. I relented and said I would do it at lunch if I had time, but after work definitely. Jarrett took the car seat out to the car and later I would realize he put the car seat where Bryce would normally be strapped in behind the passenger seat. And this particular day he put Jarrett behind me, the driver’s seat. Now it is important to note for routine sake that on my way home from work on Wednesday, I picked up Bryce and arrived at home realizing that I hadn’t picked up Jarrett. Simply because it was a change in our routine.

As I got into the vehicle, Jarrett had already strapped Bryce into his seat and neither one of us remember who put his diaper bag back behind me on the floor board as we started off for the day. Normally, the diaper bag was up front in the passenger seat along with my purse so I wouldn’t forget to drop it off this Bryce at the baby sitters house, but this week Jarrett had moved them other places in the car because of his size it was uncomfortable to put them on the floor board up front with him. As we drove off to start our work day, we don’t remember hearing Bryce cooing and laughing in the back, which was not surprising as he had such a restless night. When I dropped Jarrett off at work, he kissed me and said goodbye.

As I drove off to head to work myself, I received a phone call from my nephew and we talked for several minutes. I was concerned about him and wanted to talk with him to make sure he was doing ok. While on the phone with him, I received an urgent phone call from work, by one of my colleagues complaining that flight arrangements had not been paid for and we were honoring a fallen soldier and the concern was that the soldiers’ family wouldn’t arrive in time for the ceremony the next day. As the transportation officer, it was my job to fix those problems and we had a short time to handle the problem. I began to think about how I could solve the problem as I drove right past the turn where I would turn to drop off Bryce.

You see, I would later understand that in my mind, I had made a stop already and my normal reminders, Bryce in the rear passenger seat and the diaper bag all reminders or memory triggers that were normally there were not. To make matters worse, I had an empty car seat in my field of view, with Bryce quietly sleeping behind me not making a sound. When I arrived at work, I jumped out and hurried into work without another thought except how to get the flight issue fixed. It was only 39 degrees when we left the house and the high that day reached up to a measly 66 degrees. But as I would found out later that would be deadly.

T said...

After solving the emergency and saving the flight for the soldiers’ family, I went on with my normal day of work. I answered calls on my work phone and work cell phone as I normally left my personal cell phone in my purse. People close to me knew to call the work phones if they really needed to get in contact with me. Around 2, I picked up my personal cell phone to get a number out of it and saw I had a missed call. It was Whitney, the sitters’ new number. So I called her and got her voicemail. I left her a message. As I started to leave work, excited that we all had been let go an hour early, 4:05 to be exact, I get a call from Whitney. She asked me how Bryce was doing, I said I wasn’t sure he was with her, and she said, “No, he isn’t here”. Not realizing that Jarrett didn’t have car, I asked her if Jarrett had picked him up. Whitney said, “No Lyn you didn’t drop him off this morning.” As she said it for the second time, it began to sink in that she was saying I had FORGOTTEN to drop him off. As I drop everything and race to the car my mind is racing back to that morning and I can honestly remember dropping him off. It was impossible that he was still in the car.

When I began to open the door I could see my little baby, motionless and I was pretty sure not breathing and my heart literally stopped beating. I began screaming and immediately unstrapped him to start CPR. As I see a friend start to dial 911, I start crying as I blow breaths into his mouth for my baby to start breathing and praying that it is not too late. When the ambulance arrives and we rush to the hospital, I am in shock and overcome in disbelief that this cannot be happening to me, I cannot be the type of mother who would accidentally forget her child. When the doctor comes in and tells me they are working on my precious little boy and it doesn’t look good, I collapse to the ground and start screaming and praying to God to please take me, take my life but let him live, let me take his place.

Another few minutes pass, which seems like eternity and when the doctor returns, I can see it on her face, my nine month, ten day old son Bryce had died. I don’t really remember much after that only to recall the look on my husband’s face when he came in the room and a friend had told him our son had died and that he had been forgotten in the car. Now I can tell you that I hope someday that the horrible memories of that day are replaced with the few happy memories I have of his laugh, his infectious smile and the unconditional love he shined upon us every day. But for now, I seem to live with the hurt and pain that never lessens and is ever present like a cold stiff blanket surrounding me. And I will never forget my promise to Bryce as I was cradling him quietly with tears running down my face as I kissed his cold cheek over and over in that hospital room, that I would educate as many parents on the dangers of hyperthermia and how it is absolutely possible to accidentally forget your child because no parent should feel the way I do every day. God Bless you Bryce, Mommy misses you and this is for you.

Hey Jude said...

Ima grandma - your link is incomplete - I found the page though.

Here is the babysitter, Whitney's, post:

It is very easy for people to make judgements about this situation without knowing that circumstances or the people involved. Have I asked "HOW IN THE WORLD COULD SOMEONE FORGET THEIR CHILD IS IN THE CAR AND LEAVE HIM IN THERE??!!" I think it is probably the very first reaction ANYONE would have. But can you imagine being the MOTHER of the child who LOVED and adored that baby and having to ask yourself that question over and over and over. How do i KNOW this mother loved her baby?? Because I was Bryce's babysitter. I saw the interaction between Bryce and his mother every single day . I saw this child's eyes light up when his Mom or Dad came to pick him up and heard his little squeal of delight and saw him immediately start to play pattycake because it was his favorite thing to do with his Mommy! Lyn Balfour LOVED her baby. There is a danger in trying to be a "SuperMom"---trying to be everything to everyone. To be a great mother, to be successful and do a superb job at work, to be a great friend. Lyn gives everything she does 110% and tries so hard to be the BEST at whatever she does. As a single Mom, I can tell you that it does get hard and sometimes your mind is going in 10 different directions trying to balance it all. I think if any mother will stoip and be honest about it, you can at least realte to feeling pulled in many different directions. We think "But I could NEVER forget to take my baby out of the car". And I know without a doubt that 10 days ago Lyn Balfour would have said the same thing. We are HUMAN. We make mistakes and sometimes those mistakes have horrible, devastating consequences that can never, ever be undone. Baby Bryce is in heaven in the arms of God. He loved his little bouncer more than anything and i have this beautiful vision of him jumping and bouncing on clouds with the angels. His family is left with emptiness and silence and a huge, huge void that can never be replaced. My heart is BROKEN over the loss of this precious little baby, but i caanot even BEGIN to imagine the unfathomable sorrow and unimaginable grief that Bryce's family is experiencing. People have commented that "there has to be some kind of punishment." What kind of punishment could POSSIBLY be worse than knowing that the child you brought into the world---the precious GIFT that God gave you---the baby you loved so much---is gone because of a mistake that you made??? Today is Easter and I have been thinking of Bryce all day. First I thought, "Oh, he's not here for his first Easter", but then my little girl said to me"But Mommy, He gets to be with Jesus on Easter and that's even better than the Easter Bunny." That is so very true. I miss him so much. His family misses him so much. For those of the Christian faith, Easter is all about FORGIVENESS. Jesus suffered and died so that we, as unworthy as we may be, can have forgiveness of our sins........and certainly forgiveness of our mistakes. If there are any perfect parents out there who haven't made mistakes with their children, then I suppose you can point fingers and accuse. I know that I have made lots and lots of mistakes in my lifetime and I am just so thankful that I have a forgiving heavenly father that knows my heart and is willing to give me more chances to do better. Lyn made a mistake and she takes full responsibility for that is a mistake that has left a hole in her heart that can never, ever be filled. We need to understand that it really truly could have been ANY OF US as much as we think we are perfect parents or exercise the utmost caution with our children. WE ARE HUMAN AND WE MAKE MISTAKES. Lyn Balfour loved Bryce. I loved Bryce! Prosecuting her is not going to bring him back.

Hey Jude said...

Re above:

So, maybe it is a mistake to think the mother was not bonded - and the mother just has got really tired and resentful of Bryce *post-mortem* on account of having to keep her promise to him, to keep telling HER story, no matter how painful it was to her, because his death would be worth it. She assured his lifeless body of that, she said. She wasn't really irritable or victim-blaming at the time, only retrospectively...I don't think that could take much scrutiny, though it would be good if it were the case.


I think more likely, the mother was quite able to be affectionate and engaged with Bryce, and charming towards Whitney, for the few minutes a day she needed to spend dropping him off and picking him up at her house. I doubt she would have been otherwise. She was either leaving him for the whole day, or picking him up a couple of hours before his bed time. The babysitter was probably impressed by Lyn - she maybe projected her own love of Bryce, and babies in general, onto his mother.


Is it interesting that website is called 'The Hook'? IDK. I stil don't know if babies are hooked into car seats in that part of the world.

Anonymous said...

I don't get this story. If the low was 33 and the high 66, how is that going to create a deadly hot car? I have never gotten into my car when it is 66 degrees out and felt like I had just entered an oven. That normally would be a comfortable temperature.

Hey Jude said...

T - thanks for posting that. I have paused from reading it to point out that in this more coherent account, the mother again says that after she dropped off Jarrett she was headed to work - both times she has stated her intention was to go on to her place of work next - she does not say she was going next to drop off Bryce to the babysitter. According to her, she was heading to work, rather than to the babysitter, before she got the distracting call.

Trudy said...

YW Hey J, it looks like the "spare" car seat was in the house. I still don't understand why his regular seat was moved, though.

Here's an excerpt from yet another version. In this version 66 degrees is not "measly" and she claims she is the one who dressed Bryce, not her husband.

"That morning in Virginia, the weather was cool and cloudy. I dressed Bryce in a long-sleeved shirt, trousers and a little jacket. What I didn't know is that temperatures would reach 66 degrees, the warmest for that time of year in four years. The day before or after, he may have survived."

T said...

Link for above.

Anonymous said...

Why are you people buying this story? It's obvious the 2 parents conspired--the sensitivity around the car seat (changing car seats, Daddy dearest allegedly saying the fire dep should install it properly, the Dad not liking that Bryce kept waking up, the nope neither one if us remember who concealed the diaper bag. WTF!!! How does 66 degrees bake a baby? How hot coukd it have gotten in the car? Mid to high 70's. The story is a load of crap. And then of course their marriage stays in tact and they promptly have another baby. I would have jumped off a cliff.

T said...

Which is it?

"As Jarrett got Bryce ready for the day, he dressed him warmly as it was March and had been pretty cool in the mornings for Virginia"


"I dressed Bryce in a long - sleeved shirt, trousers and a little jacket."

Her day seems to have several "false memories".

ima.grandma said...

Thanks Juliet for the correction to the link. This is the only place I've seen this next little tidbit:

FYI Snip:
The series of events leading up to baby Bryce's death were interpreted by the prosecution as indicative of Balfour's "gross negligence" and by the defense as her "tragic flaw"— an inability to say no to people who needed her help.

The night before the tragedy in the parking lot, Erika Conely, a friend whose husband was serving overseas in the military, had a sick dog and needed someone to look after her baby. Raelyn Balfour, or "Lyn" as friends call her, was the fourth person Conely called, and she came over around 9pm.
During the two hours Balfour babysat for Conely, she consumed one or two beers, she told Conely, who testified that Balfour later asked her not to mention the beer to the police.

"The babysitting is to show Balfour's tendency to overextend herself," said Killeen, who also raised her eyebrows at the fact that Balfour drank beer while babysitting.

Balfour didn't get to sleep until 1am, and after being awakened by Bryce around 3am, she went back to bed. But essentially she began her day with just three hours of sleep. Killeen described the sleep deprivation as part of a "pattern."

Anonymous said...

Their marriage did *not* stay intact. Some articles indicate that she is no longer married to Bryce's father. At one time she was with one of the paramedics in this case. If some are going to call the parents murderers based on this one article, then you should do your homework, because other articles have different information on the events of that day. There are a lot of sloppy articles on this where it's obvious the reporter didn't do any checking. The court case went into a lot of these things in detail.

One thing you have to say about the mother in this story. She has put herself out there telling her story and taking the shame and judgment more than any other parent this has happened to - for about 13 years now. Most people are not able to do that. I agree she says a lot of inappropriate things and is troubled. (Like no one here ever has those problems?) But her being willing to tell her story is saving lives at the cost of her own reputation and at a high emotional and mental cost too. Most families move to other cities and stop talking about it because it's unbearable. I follow these cases and it's obvious that most parents go on for the sake of their other children; otherwise they would probably want to commit suicide. And they probably think about that a lot.

Taking one interview in any situation without looking closely into all the info that's out there ends up with loads of speculation on things that have already been established. Speculating about the temperature - the examination at the time he was found, his body temperature was 110 degrees. If you are interested in this case, do Google searches and read up instead of speculating.

Anonymous said...

Whatever. How many lives are being saved by the mother spreading warnings to people not to leave their kids in hot cars? Is that not common sense?

It is possibly believable that someone who is incredibly exhausted and not doing things according to routine (in other words the "perfect storm") could conceivably forget their baby in a car. However, if in fact that had happened, the minute the babysitter called, it would have clicked in her head, before the babysitter said anything at all, that holy shit she left her kid in the car.

You say the marriage is not in tact. WEll I stand corrected. I was going on the fact the mother said the husband forgave her and they right away conceived another baby. That doesn't scream guilty conscience to me. Now someone is saying that she is with a paramedic from the case. Oh OK. That has Munchausen by Proxy written all over it if you ask me. Even going around lecturing about not leaving babies in cars could be a form of medical attention seeking considering not leaving a kid in a car is common sense not requiring public awareness campaigns.

I have a very cynical view of human behavior along with a cynical view of the entire human race due to the fact that it reflects the reality of debased human nature which permeates this entire wretched planet. I call a spade a spade as I see it.

Anonymous said...

People really don't understand the dynamics of Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy and the ways in which it can manifest. MSBP "Moms" often do create what look like "accidents" which injure or kill their children in order to receive attention and to support their deeply pathological personality needs. This case, in my opinion, *may* fall into that category. I find the entire case odd, including the mother's long-lasting campaign to raise awareness about something that needs no awareness raised. Also what seems to be premeditation involved with the dynamics of "diaper bag" mysteriously placed in back where it can't be seen and where the baby would be uncomfortable. Noone "remembers" who put it there. Of course they remember. Or at least she does, since I'm sure she put it there. The comment which is designed to make her look like she is a Mom concerned about safety ie she was going to take the car to the fire department that very afternoon to have the car seat installed by the fire dep is very suspicious--it is image-building and reflects her preoccupation with making herself look like she is oh so concerned about safety when in reality, it does not seem like it. Someone can talk up a storm for 20 years about how much they love safety, but the fact that their baby baked in a car says differently.

T said...

Interesting. Here, the dad says he is the one who "always" took Bryce to daycare in his car.

Trudy said...

".....I drove right past the turn where I would turn to drop off Bryce."

"You see, I would later understand that in my mind, I had made a stop already and my normal reminders, Bryce in the rear passenger seat and the diaper bag all reminders or memory triggers that were normally there, were not."

This case should be reopened.

How could her "normal reminders" and "memory triggers" of dropping Bryce to daycare even exist if her husband always took Bryce to daycare?

Hey Jude said...

Trudy, yes - I meant the spare car seat was in the house, - it was spare to the car, but they were using it in the house. I think he was put in it to sleep rather than in his bed.. if the mother dressed him, it was before she slept in late, despite that she had to be up early to get ready for work. I reckon she dressed him for the day and put him to sleep in the spare car seat (in the house), then went back to bed to sleep bin a bit longer, because he was already dressed and the babysitter would give him his first bottle later. Well, if he hadn't died. All they had to do was pick up the spare seat on the way out of the house, with all ready to go baby in it.


How did a snuffly, stuffed up baby with a head cold sleep so silently behind her - he would have been snuffling, coughing, something, surely.

The autopsy would have shown if the baby had been shaken. I think he suffocated in the car seat during the night because he already was having trouble breathing, and either his clothing got caught up in the seat straps, or he sank into a position where he could not breathe and was stuck.

Trudy said...

I wonder what injuries LB's attempts at CPR caused....or masked.

Trudy said...

Hey Jude. Did she dress him that day, or her husband?

T said...

Listen to the interview linked at 1:46. At the very end the JB clearly says " I always took him to daycare". Lynne Balfour is lying.

Hey Jude said...

Anon @ 12.17 said:

'And, now some are trying to solve a crime that has already been solved. WTF?'

What crime?

Trudy said...

Hey J @ 2:18, Anon is probably talking about 2nd degree murder, child abuse, neglect and/ or manslaughter.

The jury found LB not guilty and so, - the crime has already been solved. Voila.

It's very hard to believe LB's defence of lacking the "normal reminders" and "memory triggers" of dropping Bryce at daycare are valid; when her husband asserts that HE is the one who ALWAYS took Bryce to daycare.

Trudy said...

There are two things LB wants you to believe:

1. The memory triggers and normal reminders (diaper bag, baby in field of view etc.) were not present on that morning. AND

2. LB had a false memory of actually dropping him off (diaper bag and all) and talking to the babysitter.

I submit that neither of those things is possible if her husband always took him to daycare.


Anonymous said...

I thought that too, but I'm confused by the autopsy. If something had happened and he had injuries that would have brought about lethargy or death, wouldn't it have shown in the autopsy?

Anonymous said...

I don't know where you live, but I live in the US and was a childcare provider for several years and have never heard anyone use the term child minder

Anonymous said...

We strap the baby in but hook or anchor the seat in.

Anonymous said...

Or God forbid it could have frickin been autocorrect. I'm sure it is always nice bit to litter your day with being a twatwaffle too but I see you failed in that regard. Anon: none of us are perfect and those of us with a brain and common sense knew what you meant. Others of us think too highly of themselves to be of use. Disregard Ally. She has no common sense or common courtesy.

LC said...

Two things stand out to me:
She usually had her purse And diaper bag in the front passenger seat. Since husband is occupying that seat on this day, someone moved "THEM" to the back, on the floor behind the driver's seat, where the baby was later found strapped in his car seat. SHE HAD HER PURSE WITH HER INSIDE HER WORKPLACE.
Husband SHOOK her for a "second time" to let her know it was time to get up (introducing 'shaking' into her scenario).

Anonymous said...

Is Trump gonna ruin his recent victories by his tweeting? Todays tweet an indication of going too far?

Anonymous said...

He took the low road for sure this time.

Anonymous said...

Maybe just a bit. He just responded to more insults, but in a harsh manner. He is the target of daily abuse and much of it far beyond any unpleasant comments he's tweeted. How long will MSM keep it going?

Anonymous said...

"The interesting thing was the lead investigator on the case walked in to the hospital that same day and told the first responders on the case, "OK, you guys go ahead and write your statements because we're going to charge her for everything you can."
He had not spoken to me and he had not spoken to my husband when he made that statement. So he already had his pre-formed opinion that I was guilty and they were going to go after me, and he was the one who set the tone for the case...."

The lead investigator was not working on your behalf. You were not the victim. Your dead son was the victim and it was the job of law enforcement/ courts to attain justice for the victim. It's not about you.

Balfour also suggests that it would be useless to send her to jail because she has been through much worse in her life and sitting in jail for her would not be "hell". Again, Balfour continues to make it about herself. It's about justice for the dead child.
It doesn't matter how she would or would not view jail.
Balfour then says that jail would not do her any good because jail is supposed to be a deterrent. That is a nice manipulation on her part. Jail is obviously not a deterrent and no one in the justice system sees it that way. Jail/prison is a way to pay a debt to this case, a life which was lost due to her negligence.
If Balfour was charged with a crime which had "intent" as a component then the prosecutor overcharged her and she received a very lucky break. From what I have read, she did not intend to kill her son but she was certainly negligent.

One of the common mantras which is often repeated in cases like this is that there is no way to punish someone as much as they are already punishing themselves with their own guilt. Balfour doesn't even allow this possibility because she says she has not guilt. She comes across as very cold, narcissistic and manipulative. It's just my opinion but it would be hard to believe anything she says.


happyuk said...


“Good morning to you all.

I want to say one or two brief words about my situation. These matters have been under investigation now for two years. There have been leaks to the media, there has been a relentless assassination attack, and for more than a month claims that a decision on laying charges was imminent.

I’m looking forward to finally having my day in court. I’m innocent of these charges; they are false. The whole idea of sexual abuse is abhorrent to me.

I’ve kept Pope Francis, the Holy Father, regularly informed during these long months, and I have spoken to him on a number of occasions in the last week, most recently I think a day or so ago. We talked about my need to take leave to clear my name. So I am very grateful to the Holy Father for giving me this leave to return to Australia.

I’ve spoken to my lawyers about when this will be necessary, and I’ve spoken to my doctors for the best way to achieve this.

All along I’ve been completely consistent and clear in my total rejection of these allegations. News of these charges strengthens my resolve and court proceedings now offer me the opportunity to clear my name and then return here, back to Rome, to work.”

Anonymous said...

Well, he, United States President Donald J Trump just posted an amazing new Twitter video. So, now, how can anyone with good sense resist basic government duties?

Anonymous said...

But.......Dont it seems odd he has a fake Time magnazine cover with his own self pic on covers?

General P. Malaise said...

why do Trump's tweets bother so many people?

why are the same people who didn't want him elected saying he shouldn't be tweeting?

Trump's is a smart operator. he has bypassed the media who are basically a treasonous bunch of losers. I would like to see him tweet more and go after the previous administrations true crimes like fast and furious and the pigford fraud as well as some of the horrible crimes against western ranchers.

Anonymous said...

I glad he tweeting too and maybes he can do it better tho. Hes a ruffian and not pollished but hes not a phonie like the pro carreer policktitions is. They maybe is jellis of him.

ima.grandma said...
Time Discrepancy?:
"Around 3:10 that afternoon when things finally started to slow down I needed to get a phone number out of my personal cell phone, so I took it out of my purse and I saw a missed call," said Raelyn.
That call came from Raelyn's babysitter to check in.
End snip...

Original article snips:
I wasn't in the office when she called, but around 2 p.m., I pulled my cellphone personal cellphone out of my purse and I saw a missed call from her.

At 2:30, I saw the missed call, I called her back, and I left her a message. She'd taken her other daycare kids to McDonald's as a treat, and around 2:30 she was still out ... So, I called and left a message ... she called me back when she saw a missed call from me at about 10 to 4

John Mc Gowan said...

"Around 3:10 that afternoon when things finally started to slow down I needed to get a phone number out of my personal cell phone, so I took it out of my purse and I saw a missed call," said Raelyn.

I pulled my cellphone personal cellphone out of my purse and I saw a missed call from her.

Does she use others "cellphones"?
Does she a have a work "cellphone"?
Why the emphasis on "personal"?
Does she have another "cellphone" that only a select few are aware of.?
If so, what does she use it for?
The repetition of "my" and "personal" in conjunction with "cellphone" is very sensitive to her.

Anonymous said...

They be spinning his tweet to claim he sexits. But he tweeted at Mika AND Joe not just Mika. That looks like spin to me.

ima.grandma said...

John, the word "personal" is intentionally placed throughout her stories and jumped out at me from the start.

She was talking to her nephew for 29 minutes before receiving the work emergency call. I assume she took the personal call on her personal cellphone, as I assume the work call came in on her work cellphone. Either way, she would have had to retrieve her purse from the back seat. She states in one of the articles that she completed both phone calls before arriving at work @8:30 am.

"I answered calls on my work phone and work cell phone as I normally left my personal cell phone in my purse.  People close to me knew to call the work phones if they really needed to get in contact with me.  Around 2, I picked up my personal cell phone to get a number out of it and saw I had a missed call.  It was Whitney, the sitters’ new number..."

Change of language noted:

She PULLS her cellphone out of her purse, (personal cellphone, clarifying personal as if it was an afterthought) @2pm

She TAKES her personal cellphone out of her purse@3:10pm

She PICKS UP her personal cellphone (as if the phone was laying on her desk) @2pm

ima.grandma said...

Babysitter Whitney Huff called Balfour AT WORK at 9:42am to ask where Bryce was.

ima.grandma said...

According to the defense, Balfour didn't DISCOVER she had a MESSAGE on her personal cell phone until around 3pm when she saw that Huff had called. Testimony indicated that Balfour then left a message for Huff, but the two didn't speak directly until 3:58pm.

Anonymous said...

Certainly it is SPIN. Deliberately misinterpreting and disseminating.

Hey Jude said...

I know it is possible to forget your baby is in the car, even if you know you left him in the car, you can forget within a minute or two that he is there. I know because, amongst my extensive catalogue of parental failures, is the fact that I twice forgot I had left my sleeping toddler son in the car. We had returned from shopping, and I was distracted upon taking my younger baby up into the house first - I intended to bring my son up within a minute or two, but I was distracted, and began putting away the groceries, which my husband had brought in. I don't remember why I went into the kitchen - it's likely Mr Jude spoke to me and I went to see what he said. Between one room and the other I forgot about my son. Thankfully I remembered he was still in the car at the next thought of him, which was probably to wonder why I had not seen or heard him since we had got back to the house.

I don't know if I was aware of the danger of overheating the first time I forgot him, I do know I panicked when I remembered he was in the car, but I think that was due to the possibility he may have woken and found himself alone in the car. He was still asleep, but clammy and hot, and his hair was damp, as though he had been outside running and playing on a hot day. Thankfully, he soon cooled down, and was fine. I was still unpacking the groceries when I remembered he was in the car - even so, the car had heated up considerably during that time.

When I hear of a baby who has died in a hot car, I think, there but for the grace of God go I, or any of us... it is possible to forget your baby is in the car. No-one thinks they could forget their baby.

The second time I forgot he was in the car, the car was parked in the garage - it was cool in the garage, and in the car. That time more time passed before I remembered he was still in the car. I had been distracted and unpacking shopping then, too, but I must have been further distracted before I remembered, as it didn't take twenty minutes to unpack the shopping.

I left him in a shop, too, when he was a younger baby. I had walked thirty or forty yards before I had the sense something was different, something was missing - then I realised I was not pushing the pram, or pushchair, I forget which, and ran back for him. In those days, mothers left their babies in their prams and pushchairs, inside, to the side of the shop door, on the way in - people were more trusting back then, When you went out through the other door, you could forget you had the baby with you - well, I did. I'm sure others have forgotten their baby for a short time, and are loath to admit it. Actually, I am not sure, but I do think anyone can have a similar slip of the mind.

I share all that because what puzzles me is how, at the next thought of her baby, Bryce’s mother did not remember that she had not taken him out of the car, and therefore had also not taken him to the babysitter. When I forgot my son, it was the next thought of him which caused me to remember he was still in the car.

I wonder if anyone else here ever similarly forgot their baby, and if so, what caused them to remember, and after how much time?

Anonymous said...

Ann Coulter just Tweeted this:
Trump's tweets are beneath the dignity of the White House, where presidents diddle interns with cigars and run guns to Mexico.
38 minutes ago · Twitter

Now thats a great reply to all those claiming outrage.

Hey Jude said...

John and Ima Grandma - If she had to go in the back seat to ger her purse on the way in to work, she couldn't have not seen Bryce was still in the car, could she? How could she not notice him.

Hey Jude said...

Continuing on her not remembering:

I can see that as she was in work, she would not miss his presence in that environment, as he was never there.

Still, I think if she had not thought of him before the missed call, she would have thought about him and remembered she had not taken him out of the car, or to the babysitter, when she saw the missed call.

I find it difficult to believe she had no prompting thought of him during the day, or by missed calls.

I find it even more difficult to believe that she had no prompting memory of herself NOT taking him out of the car, while actually she was thinking of him. She said that she had been thinking about him, and herself with him. ‘In her mind’ she had taken him to the babysitter, and also had a conversation with the babysitter.

I think it worth considering where, ‘in her mind’, that morning’s conversation would most likely have led - she didn’t say she had a memory of just dropping him off, but also, she had a memory of a conversation. As conversations have words. I believe she had rehearsed the conversation that she would have had to have had, if she had tried to leave Bryce with the babysitter that day. She acknowledges a real conversation did not take place - yet ‘in her mind’, there is memory of a conversation. So, how did the conversation she had 'in her mind' go, based on what she had said about how Bryce was that night? Did it turn out she could leave the ‘just very lethargic baby’ with the babysitter?

Anonymous said...

Who can say for sure Tania. Who knows.

Hey Jude said...

In imagining the following I am trying to let her words (about how Bryce was) guide my thoughts on how the conversation, which she says she had ‘in her mind’ was likely to have gone:

Hi, Whitney. Here are his things, I hope you all have a good day.
How is his head cold now - how was he overnight?
Well, he had a bad night, he went ballistic actually, but he’s crashed out now, so he’ll probably sleep for hours.
Do you think you should leave him today, Lyn?
Well, I’d rather stay home with him, of course, but I have a lot on at work. I’m sure he’ll sleep - he’s just very lethargic now, you probably won’t hear a sound out of him.
I’m really not sure you should leave him today, Lyn?
I think he’s fine, really, it’s just a cold, he’s all stuffed up.
Do you think you should maybe take him to the doctor, Lyn, as you say he is lethargic? It doesn’t sound good that he is ‘very’ lethargic. He doesn’t look well. He might be sickening for something worse. You know I can’t tend all the children properly if one of them is sick. I promised to take them to McDonald’s today.
I’m sure he’ll be fine - you can always call me if he wakes up and doesn’t settle.
Lyn, I really don’t think I can look after him today…

Realistically, the conversation she remembered having, yet which did not place, could only have gone similarly to that. She must have been thinking how the babysitter would have been concerned, expressed reluctance, and probably plain refused to take the baby that day. The conversation was un-haveable, in my opinion, because only a crazy person would think it was okay to take a ‘just very lethargic’ baby to their babysitter, and expect her to look after him as though he just had the snuffles, rather than take him to a doctor.

And so, I think, on account of her having had the conversation 'in her mind' with the babysitter, it is very possible that she has lied about not knowing her baby was in the car, rather than with the babysitter. I think it quite possible she left him in the car because she was unable to take her ‘just very lethargic baby’, or possibly already dead baby, to the babysitter, so she left him in the car in the hope the circumstances would lead to it the conclusion he died of suffocation in the car, when he had already suffocated due to his clothes becoming entangled in the car seat straps, in the house, during the night/early morning.

It was tragic, and I don’t doubt Bryce died accidentally - I doubt her claim that she forgot him in the car, and that he died in the car.

ima.grandma said...

My point exactly Juliet @4;53. Her STORIES and timelines are bursting with deception. It's possible the deceptive details included in her explanation were strategically placed to ease her shocking guilt and to limit public condemnation. Her career history and positions within the power ranks lead me to believe she was intelligent and more than able to think and perform under pressure. Strategies can backfire but she had to stick with her original words. Perhaps in making the choice between being forever labeled as a negligent suffering mother or a conniving liar, she chose the latter.

That said, I do not associate this tragedy in the same category as the Ross Harris case. I believe she lied from day one but don't believe she intentionally caused Bryce's death or allowed him to continue to rot in that backseat for one minute just to cover herself iif she did discover her unforgiveable mistake at an earlier time than admitted.

I believe she ignored the babysitter's calls and message.

Anonymous said...

Progressive leader Michael Moore donates $10,000 to 'Shakespeare in the Park'after corporate sponsors withdraw. Sad. Very sad. Very very sad. All in the name of free speech.

Pak31 said...

For those thinking 66 degrees won't bake a child, you are incorrect. According to many internet articles, 72 or 74 degrees and above can turn deadly but children have died in cars where the high temp were in the low 60's. The main reason is because babies don't have the same ability to produce sweat as older people do, in order to cool their bodies off. Not saying he died from the heat for sure just that it's possible for babies at those low temps.

Hey Jude said...

I think she knew he was in the car from at least the time she ignored the first call, and she continued to ignore calls throughout the day because she knew he was in the car. It sounds, from the times she gives in a comment left above, as if there were quite a few calls besides those in the analysis interview. As the baby 'was very lethargic' when she falsely remembered leaving him with the babysitter, she surely would have checked, and answered the calls if really she thought he was sick, at the babysitter's.

If she took her purse which contained the phones from the back footwell on leaving the car for work, 'like normal' - she surely would have seen the baby was still in the car.
I agree she did not intentionally cause his death - I think he was already dead when he was put into the car, perhaps both parents pretended not to know, thus the 'just very lethargic', and 'we' didn't hear him cooing in the car, not a sound, on the way to work. She was always on the way to work rather than to the daycare, *before* the calls which distracted her. So she was not on the way to daycare before she was distracted. That's what she said in the two accounts - she dropped off her husband and she she was going to work.


I will think about reasons why I could be wrong. I accept I could be misinterpreting her words and actions - also that we are not meant to meant to interpret.

Anonymous said...

MSM making the tweet all about Mika B saying only that Trump attacked a female journalist and ignoring that he mentioned Joe S also.

Hey Jude said...

I know I said at the time when I changed my user name that I didn't mind if anyone wanted to continue to call me Juliet, but I'd rather be Hey Jude, Jude, or HJ, now, Ima Grandma. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Well, and so thats why the haven't any credibility.

Anonymous said...

As president he still requires congress/senate cooperation and should be more cautious to not cause them to react and refuse to cooperate.

Anonymous said...

Paul J Watson sharply replied to Jeb Bushes criticism of Prez Trump by saying killing thousands of US service personel and one million Iraqis was much worse than a tweet.

Pak31 said...

This mother makes everything about her, has a million excuses, blames everything and everyone else for making her forgot her child. Does anyone know if there was a statement given by Jarrett? I'd like to hear his acccount. How could you have a sick child and not think about him once the whole day? Then when she was told by doctors that he might not make it, her reaction was to pray the God takes her. Really? Why wouldn't you pray to God to help Bryce survive? Then she feels the need to educate people about how not to forget your child? Why do people need to be told that? Why was she shocked about how hot a car heats up? Haven't most people been in a car in warm weather? It gets hot. I'm mostly amazed that these two parents spent the better part of the week taking care of a sick baby and mom drops dad off for work, he kisses her but doesn't acknowledge his son and she forgets him altogether.

Hey Jude said...

I like that Donald tweets - I like that he is president - I like his sense of humour. I think many people don't get him, and that he is underrated. Here people think you are stupid, immoral, or insane if you admit to liking him, such has been the success of the media campaign against him.

Anonymous said...

I dont want trump to get obstructed because GOP dont like him. So he got to stop being impulsive & givin the dems & reps ammo against him. Make sense?

Hey Jude said...

I thought the drama at the hospital was unlikely, or acting, in view of everything which went before it. She was actively sympathy seeking.

Anonymous said...

He aint one of them and its good. I'm glad but they cannot accept it. Too bad. He clearly states his priority is security of our country. Why do they fight against that? Its crazy.

Hey Jude said...

Some people are always providing the opposition with ammunition to use against them - it's crazy; they must be natural giverrs. :)!

ima.grandma said...

Pak, this transcript will assist. It's long but very interesting and worth the time if you are invested in this case.

Pak31 said...

Did I just read that they had four more children after Bryce, the last being born in June of 2012? I found I odd that she became pregnant shortly after his death but then she kept having babies. Wow.

ima.grandma said...

"Lyn doesn't sleep well," said Mr. Balfour. She did not get to sleep until 1am March 30, and was up again at 3:30am for at least 30 minutes when Bryce woke up and couldn't find his pacifier, Mr. Balfour said.

For most of Bryce's young life, his father drove him to the babysitter, who had lived north of their Greene County residence. The sitter recently had moved to Forest Lakes South, and the parents split "50-50" the task of delivering him in the morning, depending on their work schedules.

He said his wife's stress level was not unusual. "I don't think Bryce created any additional stress on either of us," he said. "It was just tiring."

Anonymous said...

Just hold on a minute, was trumps remarks about mika true? Was she bleeding badly from surgery? Did he lie? No one saying if what he said was made up. Sure seems like a strange thing to say even if its true. They mock and attack him daily and are shocked and exaggerate when he replies? But still is what he said true? Wacko. Low IQ or Crazy isnt really a big deal. But the bleeding and being denied entrance sure is strange and its inappropriate for tbe whole world to read.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Sorry new phone was giving me trouble with SA posting so hard to figure outtt

Anonymous said...

I miss all the colors

Anonymous said...

Having no news is maybe better than having the fakes news is. TV is just for the lazys anyhow isnt it?

Hey Jude said...

Is it right that the babysitter was in fear of the accusation that she had gone to the workplace and deposited Bryce in his mother's car at lunchtime, and that the mother gave her $1,500 so that she could hire herself a lawyer? Or did I read that wrong? It's so outrageous, and contemptible, I am sure I must have read it wrong - is there a way to read it differently? It is in the closing arguments, in the link which Ima Grandma posted.

Disappointingly, the trial seemed largely to have concentrated on the telephone calls rather than the events of the night and early morning.

It did include that the mother had babysat the previous night, until 11pm, for a friend who needed to take her dog to the vet as an emergency. She drank two beers while she babysat. Maybe she had been virtually assured the baby/child was unlikely to wake up - even so, it could not have been the best idea when she knew she had to go home to care for her own baby, who she knew was likely to wake, which he did, at one.

It's so sad that she let so many other things take priority over her own baby - she seems to have had difficulty in saying 'no'.


I see there are reasons why changes to the routine, the placement of the car seats, the quietness of the baby, might have distracted her. Even so, I still think her intention was to bypass daycare and go to work before she was distracted by the phone calls because that is what she said - she dropped off Jarret and was going on to her work place.

It also spiked my interest to read that when she took Bryce from the car, she carried him from the driver side where he had been, and laid him on the ground on the passenger side. I think that says she had the thought to lay him on the opposite side so that first responders would think he had been in the car seat on the passenger side, within the mother's field of view. Why would she do that? I propose it was to give the impression that he had not been deliberately placed in the seat which was out of the driver's field of view (in the analysis transcript she said that the seat was placed 'out of the field of view of the driver - it sounded, to me, as though that was intended) - which I think says guilt - she did not want them to think, as there were two seats, that he had been placed in the one which was out of view, despite that was the intended excuse for why she forgot about him. Guilt overrode, even though it might have created the complication that she should have seen him if he had, in fact, been on the passenger side, which the investigators might have assumed from where she laid him.

Was there any questioning as to why she took the time, and had the thought, to carry him round to the passenger side before placing him on the ground? If he had been placed in the seat behind the driver in all innocence, I don't think she would have had the thought to place him on the ground on the other side of the car? Well, unless there was some practical reason, like there was no space on the driver's side. Why would it even be mentioned, if it was not a point of interest, or considered somehow relevant to the case? Obviously she went on to say, and says now, he was in the seat behind the driver, but I think in the initial panic, she wanted it assumed he had been in the other seat. Well, there were two seats, it would be questionable by anyone why he had been placed in the seat out the driver's view.

Her explanation may be completely true - the sensitivity could have been that she feared investigators, or anyone, would suspect he had been placed out of view deliberately, because there were two seats, and he was put in the old seat out of view rather than the newer one which was in view. That could be why she goes on about the seats, and the spare seat not fitting, and taking it to the fire department at lunchtime, which she did not do, because she was too busy.

Maggie said...

Huh????hey?!!!!??!!! What colors/colours where the car doors??!!??!!?! Huh?!!!hey??!!!???black?!!!

Anonymous said...

Do anyone nose what time is it in london?

Hey Jude said...

4.09 am or 4.10 depending on whether I look at my clock or my fridge.

Hey Jude said...

Upon neither of which tha actual time is dependent.

I know, don't feed the troll.- sorry.

Maggie said...

Hey Jude what colour/color is your fridge door??!!?!!huh!??!??hey!?!!??!huh!??!!

Christopher Gaylord said...


Donald Tweet said...


Anonymous said...

The time isnt depenent upon what exactly? Time isnt dependent on anything. Its caused by movement, rotation actually, that is measureable. Without the rotation there would be no time, so maybe it can be theorized to be dependent. Is this what you mean?

John McGowan said...

I love analysing bits,I especially love analysing the"handwriting".

Hey Jude said...

Yes,my fridge has "hobnobs"in it.

Anonymous said...

HWA is unreliable & evryboddy nose it?

John McGowan said...

KnOw!! it's nice,I like it.

Anonymous said...

But at 10:30pm, i means at 4:30am i donts care what colour frige is. Due you?

Christopher Gaylord said...


Maggie said...

Huh!?!!!!;;hey!?!!?!! Huh!??!!?!!

Anonymous said...

But no one handwrights no more. Why should we? Huh? We gots textan. Is it true in UK skools kids learn textan instead of the Olde hynd wrytn?

Anonymous said...

I think Trump is just sick of phonies. i know someone who got a facelift in her mid 30's and then mentally derailed, withdrew from anyone she knew pre-facelift, all former froends were discarded, left social media. I get what he is saying. People who get facelifts have no right to be throwing stones at him bc they have serious personal problems. Literally to the point where the indovidual's "identity" will become unrecognizable post-facelift. Oftentimes they do gravitate directly towsrds high society post facelift too for whatever reason prob something to do with why they got the facelift in the first place.

Hey Jude said...

No, time is an illusion and I was just being polite by joining in with the idea of it.

Stop trolling.

Have a YouTube with black car doors.

Good night/morning/whatever. :)

Hey Jude said...

I taike ahs add songun maike it Betta.

Maggie said...


Anonymous said...

Now doggonit, trump said Nika was badly bleeding. Dont excuse what he said. Is statement true or untrue. I thought you are an expert analyzing spoken words.

Anonymous said...

An illusion? 6 billions of people are bound by time. Thats just those alive now. Pretty strong illusion.

Anonymous said...

Hmmm...I believe his words that she was badly bleeding as the incisions are long and also within the scalp area which bleeds very badly even after stitches bc of all the blood vessels.

Anonymous said...

Are you saying her wounds were not properly dressed? And she went out anyway? Are you implying just after surgery Nikka was like, uh, hey lets go visit Don Trump and play golf. Come on now. I dont believe the tweet.

Anonymous said...

Jump on the Crazy Train at statement analysis!

Anonymous said...

Nikka has likely been around high level people her entire life because who her father is. No facelift required for admittance.

Anonymous said...

Can any SA-er here answer my serious question? Did Trump tell truth or lie? Or did he just exaggerate.

John McGowan said...

His "handwriting"has/had"squiggly bits",so he told mediumush factulations.

Anonymous said...

So so sad. So very sad. So very very sad. Not one trained statement analyst here to determine if Trumps Mika tweet is truth telling or lying?

Anonymous said...

The inner nets saying that Joe & Mika is mad & they gonna show on tv in justa few hours.

Anonymous said...

The midnite shift at SA cant do job. Not trained and kwalified to answer. Please call back in morning or leave a message and someone can get in touch with you.

Anonymous said...

Thats what we been saying all along.

John McGowan said...

I'm quaffifyed,I see squiggly portions galore,p.s ASK TRUMPALD TWEET HIMSELF,she's on Twitter.

Anonymous said...

Them trained analysts might be stumped if trump claims he was joeking. How can they know the difference?

Anonymous said...

Silence. Not even one can answer.

Anonymous said...

At 11:57.

Anonymous said...

Take a valium dude. Trump is telling the truth. They dont always "dress" head incisions, they just put antibiotics on and yes they do continue to bleed for days. I have had both a head injury (cut--a small one) and head surgery (again--very small incision) but yes after stitches they will continue to bleed for days. A forehead lift incision alone goes along the entire top of the head just below the hairline! Yes it bleeds for days even with stitches. However bc there are so many blood vessels in the scalp the incisions do heal well leaving only a faint scar after momths of healing. Yes he is telling the truth & when someone is bleeding from the head it does seem they are bleeding badly! It is not a pretty sight!

Anonymous said...

I kinda cant believe Trump wrote that, but keep in mind he is under attack by the media constantly. The press bullies him, like if he walks down the street the press will be like "Trump walked down the street and gave a bird flying by a dirty look". They make it very hard for him to do his job as president!

Anonymous said...

Its so weird to have a phone that works! My other phone was 8 or 9 yrs old--had to replace it cause the shut off button broke & battery would only last for like 2 hrs--totally crazy!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Standing ovation

Anonymous said...

AnonymousJune 27, 2017 at 5:46 PM
Good grief, overthink, hyperanalyze and overspeculate much? I think the woman is batcrao crazy but wth? I would say spare seat if my daughter was in a seat not generally used. I want to like this site bit the over the top freaking speculation makes it ridiculous


This site has become laughable to me. Initially, the concept piqued my interest, but, while SA is, in theory, about words, all the analysis contains bias, along with moral and right-leaning political judgment.

Keep in mind, there is no scientific model for SA, so when the "analyst" says, "in SA, we know that this means this," how do they know this?


Hogs said...

If they can't say it for them,we shan't do it to them.

Anonymous said...

From Daisy (Part 1)

I snagged this from the Internet. I am not good at Statement Analysis but it sounded to me like a genuinely grieving mother.

Original URL:

please please please god vaccinate your kids
I'm sitting alone drinking to much again and just need to get this off my chest. Three years ago I had a baby girl, her name was Emily and I loved her more than anything in this entire fucked up world. She was a mistake and I'd only been getting my shit together when I found out I was going to have her. I spent a long time thinking over whether or not I should have her or just abort her because I wasn't bringing her into a good place, but in the end I planned things out and did everything to make sure I could afford her and we wouldn't be living in poverty. I did everything I could for my baby with doctors visits and medicine and working a shit retail job at 8 months pregnant all by myself just so I could bring some happiness into my life. she was born in October and was so so beautiful. I'd messed up a few things in my life but I wasn't going to mess up with her if I could help it.
Then when she was 8 months old, too young yet for an mmr shot? she got sick. She was sick for a while and I'd never seen anything like it. I took her to the doctor. She was in the hospital and she looked so bad, she was crying and coughing and there was nothing I could do. I felt like the worst mother in the world. After I got her to the hospital she got worse, got something called measles encephalitis, where her brain was inflamed. I hadn't believed in god in years but you better believe I was praying for her every day.
She died in the hospital a week or so later. I held her little tiny body and wanted to jump off a bridge and broke down in the hospital. The nurses were sympathetic and I was, well I made a scene I'm pretty sure.

Anonymous said...

Daisy (part 2)

I found out later via facebook of fucking course that the neighbor I'd had watch my baby was an anti-vaxxer and had posted photos of her kid sick and other bullshit about how he was fine.

He was fine? He was FINE? My kid was DEAD because she made that choice. I went over and talked to her and she admitted he'd been sick when she'd had my kid last but didn't think much of it. I screamed at her. I screamed and yelled and told her the devil was going to torture her soul for eternity you god loving cunt because she took my baby from me. I'm sure I looked crazy, at the time maybe I was. I'm crying writing this now, and in my darkest moments I'd wished her kid was dead and it makes me feel worse.

I'd like to say I'm doing better but I'm really not. I'm alive, going day to day, trying to be the person I wanted to be for my kid even if my little Emily isn't here anymore. That's the only thing keeping me going anymore. I don't have anything else left.

Please vaccinate your kids, so other moms like me don't have to watch their baby die. It's not just your choice only affecting your kid, you are putting every child who for some reason hasn't gotten vaccinated in SO much danger. Please please please for the love of god please vaccinate.

EDIT: I spent a long time thinking about if I should edit this, after being horrified that I posted this in the first place and puking and crying. I still can't deal with any of this when not drunk. Thank you to everyone for the support, saying that doesn't really cover how I feel, I'm just glad there are good people out there, and I'm sorry to all of you who have suffered a loss. To everyone who told me I was a murderer, that it was my fault, that I was an awful mother, that my child spending time with a boy who had measles was NOT the reason my baby got measles, that I never should have had a kid because I was poor, and that I should kill myself, I have only one thing to say to you, because anything else isn't worth it: I hope you are happy. I hope you live a long and happy life with people in it who love you and care for you and that you do not suffer like I did. I hope you are loved.

John Mc Gowan said...

OT Update:


IDAHO FALLS — The grandmother of missing toddler DeOrr Kunz Jr. says she will keep returning to the Timber Creek Campground in Lemhi County until her grandson is found or until the day she dies.

Trina Bates Clegg spoke with East Idaho Newsmakers about the case in a 38-minute interview that will be posted Sunday on

DeOrr was 2 years old when he vanished while on a camping trip with his parents, great-grandfather and a friend of his great-grandfather on July 10, 2015. There has been no sign of the toddler since that day, and nobody has been charged in connection to his disappearance.

Clegg said even though it’s been nearly two years since DeOrr disappeared, she plans to return to Timber Creek Campground next weekend to search for the boy. She’s inviting the public to help and hopes to get answers.

“Until I know in my heart that I’ve covered every inch of that area, which may never happen in my lifetime, but until I feel confident that I’ve covered more areas and I’ve seen more ground, I’ll go back there until the day I die. I don’t care if I’m 90 years old,” Clegg said.

The emotional twists and turns of the last two years have taken a toll on Clegg and her family. She believes errors have been made in the investigation, including when former Lemhi County Sheriff Lynn Bowerman named Vernal Kunz and Jessica Mitchell, DeOrr’s parents, as suspects in the disappearance. Mitchell is Clegg’s daughter.

“I think if that’s what their suspicions were, they should have kept their mouths shut and pursued that,” Clegg said. “If you stole something from me and all of a sudden everyone keeps pointing fingers at you, what are you going to do with what you had stolen from me? Hide it, get rid of it, try to make it less suspicious. If (investigators) had just kept things quiet, maybe something would have come up.”


John Mc Gowan said...

During her East Idaho Newsmakers interview, Clegg discussed a variety of aspects in the case, including private investigator Philip Klein, an age progressed photo of DeOrr recently released by the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and her relationship with her daughter, Jessica.

“Everyone always asks me, ‘Why can’t you get (Jessica) to talk?’ I have sat in interrogation rooms and I’ve begged her. I threw pictures of baby Deorr in front of her and said, ‘All it takes is you to talk to them,'” Clegg said. “There was a time she was offered immunity. (They said) ‘Sign that piece of paper and tell us what happened. You can walk right out that door.’ Why wouldn’t she sign immunity if that’s the case?

Clegg continued, “I may get proved wrong. I can’t say that it may not happen, but as of right now, I have to believe in my heart the things that I’ve been told.”

‘Search For Answers For Baby DeOrr’ will be held July 8 to 9 at Timber Creek Campground in Lemhi County. Volunteer searchers are asked to wear appropriate shoes and bring food and water. Click here for more information.

A community vigil for DeOrr will be held at 7 p.m. July 10 at Freeman Park in Idaho Falls. Attendees are asking to bring a blue balloon and a candle. Click here for more information.

Anonymous said...

Haha I saw in the paper who Trump was tweeting about! Those 2 TV hosts are so obnoxious and full
of themselves! #Teamtrump #MAGA

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