Monday, December 30, 2013

Search for Melissa Sowders

Search for missing pregnant woman continues in north Harris County

Melissa Sowders was last seen by her boyfriend, Jason Sanford, who said that she had dropped him off for work at 6:15 a.m.
Sowders was in their white Honda Accord, which deputies found Friday night on Interstate 45 near Richey Road.
Texas Equusearch began assisting with the search for Sowders at 8:30 a.m. on Saturday with their staging area set up at the Daily Bread Church, 106 Bammel-Westfield Road. They spent most of the day searching the area around Cypress Creek.
Sowders boyfriend yearns for his girlfriend and their unborn child.
“She always wanted a kiss, so soft. I don’t know where Melissa is at. Where are you?” Sanford said Saturday.
Note that he references her in the past tense.  This is not from a parent of a missing child, but should be considered.  What causes him to use past tense?   Note also that he does not say that he does not know where she is, but where she is "at", which is often used in terms of emotional or intellectual positioning rather than geographical.  

Note that the past tense reference could be that he knows she is not alive, or that he suspects she is not because of the ex husband.  See quote below where he "fears the worst." 

His statement is concerning and the journalist should have followed up with him.  
Sanford said Sowders, who is pregnant with their child, was supposed to go meet her ex-husband, Matthew Sowders, and their youngest daughter at the McDonald’s on FM 1960 near Kuykendahl Road.
The father has custody of all their children.
She called me and said she was there and everything,” Sanford said.
Indicating more information.  She was "there", at the location, but what is "everything"?
No one is sure what happened after the visit at McDonald’s but Sowders hasn’t been seen since.

Why not a follow up with the children's father??  Very poor reporting. 
Jimmy Newsom, Melissa Sowder’s father, admits he is suspicious of her ex-husband.
“She’s afraid of him because of he was physically and mentally abusive,” Newsom said.
Note that "physical" comes before "mental" regarding abuse.  This is expected in domestic violence cases as more priority to the father is his daughter's physical safety since she is missing. 
Newsom also said not staying in touch was not his daughter’s style.
It’s not like her not to call us back or if we call her she always answers the phone or if not she’ll call us later on,” he said.
Now family members are re-reading a Christmas card she gave them.
Now that I’m with Jason, I’ll be around a lot more. I miss you guys,” read Newsom.
If they find her, she’s not going to be here anymore,” Sanford said. “I fear the worst. I love you baby. I miss you so much. I want you to come home.”
It is not known why the journalist would not ask for elaboration at this point.  
Deputies are asking for the public’s help to find Sowders. They believe foul play might be involved in her disappearance.
If you can help find, contact the Harris County Sheriff’s Office Homicide Unit at (713) 967-5810 or Crime Stoppers at (713) 222-TIPS.


Anonymous said...

"I FEAR the worst"The"worst"??? Worst for who?himself? If I was him I'd be "fearing"for HER.he's Guilty in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

Sanford said Sowders, who is pregnant with their child, was (supposed) to go meet her ex-husband, Matthew Sowders.

If the finger is being pointed at her ex-husband, i would expect him to say "She (went) to meet her ex-husband and not "she was (supposed) to meet her ex-husband".

"Supposed" suggest she never got there, and if this is true, how does he know that she never got there?

Anonymous said...

Melissa Sowders was last seen by her boyfriend, Jason Sanford, who said that she had dropped him off for work at 6:15 a.m.

Is this possible alibi building?

Anonymous said...

Michael Schumacher r.I.p. xxx

Anonymous said...

No it's not.

Nanna Frances said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nanna Frances said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stormyweather said...

She always wanted a kiss, so soft. I don’t know where Melissa is at. Where are you?” Sanford said Saturday.
This statement is odd to me, in my opinion it's unexpected to hear him talk about her soft kisses which she always wanted ( why not always wants)?

Anonymous said...

Did police contact the ex husband? He has the 4 year old daughter with him it seems.

Anonymous said...

Oh, not 4 year old child,they have 4 children. Latest reports say he met her with all 4 children.
"According to officials, she was at a McDonald's to meet her estranged husband and pick up her four children."
Are the children safe?

Anonymous said...

It seems Sanford himself has guilty knowledge.

Tricia said...

Melissa Rene Sowders, 26, was last seen at the McDonald's near FM 1960 and I-45 at around 11am. She was reported missing by a friend and foul play is suspected.

Tricia said...

Melissa may have been captured by the cameras at McDonalds.

Tricia said...

News article above dated yesterday, Sunday December 29th, 2013

Tricia said...

Update from roughly an hour ago:

Crews searching for Sowders Monday morning said they spotted something in the water where they had been searching. It's unclear what the sonar picked up, but a dive team will now enter the water.

Tricia (not Miss Marple) said...

OK anon. I won't think I'm Miss Marple.

tricia STILL thinks shes miss marple said...

Ok.thank you.*watches*(just in case).

Tricia (STILL not Miss Marple) said...

Your welcome.

tricia is Tricia not marple anymore said...

Thanks again.I can have my meal now,thank you xxxxxxxxx

Tricia (confirmed) said...

The news links do provide a good source of food. Enjoy. I'll post more as hear updates.

Links provide data written from multiple sources. (Not always from the mouth of the "subject" analyzed. )

Mommabrac said...

Nanna Frances posted a comment from the KHOU website from yesterday. That comment is mine and I want it removed from this blog immediately. That comment was removed from the KHOU website last night and it should not have been reposted here.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for all the updates Tricia!

Lemon said...

Miss Jaeger-
Thank you for taking possession of the comment, dear. Did you know its bad form to get all stompy foot and demanding, especially to our own Nanna Frances?

Tricia (confirmed) said...

Anonymous said...
Sanford said Sowders, who is pregnant with their child, was (supposed) to go meet her ex-husband, Matthew Sowders.

If the finger is being pointed at her ex-husband, i would expect him to say "She (went) to meet her ex-husband and not "she was (supposed) to meet her ex-husband".

"Supposed" suggest she never got there, and if this is true, how does he know that she never got there?

Anon....that ^^^^^^ statement about "supposedly going to meet" was made by the news anchor. Not the boyfriend. They then played a clip of the boyfriend stating:

JASON SANFORD actual video clip
"she met up with him, she called me told me she was there and everything." <----From boyfriends mouth via interview.

“She called me and said she was there and everything,” Sanford said.
Peter asks...Indicating more information. She was "there", at the location, but what is "everything"?

Jason used the word "told" where the news instead wrote "said" in error.

Mouth verses human error

Julie B said...

Personally I think Mrs. Jaeger was not stompy foot and demanding. She didn't waste words on the statement she wanted to make and "owned" it. Precise, to the point reliable and nice to read for a change.

Nanna Frances said...


Thank you.

That comment was still on the website today. Why post it if you don't want everyone to read it?

I fear the worst for Melissa Sowders. She and her ex-husband had 4 daughters.

Trolls are busy today.

Anonymous said...

I assumed Debra Jaeger was addressing the blog owner here, asking them to remove the post. She needed to list Nanna Francis's name to further identify which comment she desired removed.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
"I FEAR the worst"The"worst"??? Worst for who?himself? If I was him I'd be "fearing"for HER.he's Guilty in my opinion.


Really? Just like that? You must be a genius!! (P.S. More and more signs are pointing to the stranged husband and not the boyfriend, but by all means.... if STATEMENT ANALYSIS tells you the boyfriend is guilty, bhy golly we should lock his ass up NOW!!!

Tricia (confirmed) said...

“If they find her, she’s not going to be ALIVE anymore, um “I FEEL the worst. I love you baby. I miss you so much." Long pause.......
REPORTER: want you to come home?"
JASON parrots: "I want you to come home.”

“If they find her, she’s not going to be here anymore,” Sanford said. “I fear the worst. I love you baby. I miss you so much. I want you to come home.”

Jason's voice sound like FEEL instead of FEAR. I'm only 98% sure though.

Maggie said...

When her boyfriend says "she always wanted a kiss, so soft" this sounds like he is following some type of script.
Acting out some kind of drama.
It almost sounds like Shakespeare and actually I feel it may be a line from one of his plays.
I am suspecting the boyfriend.

Maggie said...

It has been 20 yrs since I read Shakespeare's plays, but my mind is thinking of Othello--was that a line from "Othello"?

Tricia (confirmed) said...

Jason clearly said - she’s not going to be ALIVE
vs written article - she’s not going to be HERE

Tricia (confirmed) said...

The police officers most likely know who is tesponsible They have not shared everything with us. Its also possible the news station slightly changed the wording of the content so the suspects don't become flighty. MOO.

Maggie said...

I agree--the boyfriend saying "If they find her she's not going to be here anymore." in my opinion he is "leaking" out the info that she is dead ("not here anymore").
I think boyfriend did it.

Mommabrac said...

The comment I made WAS deleted along with a extremely inflammatory and slanderous comment made by a "best friend" of Melissa's. I had responded to her comment so I assume that's why my comment was removed as well. I had alerted the Sowders family of the comments being made so I assume this had something to do with them being removed. The reason I wanted it deleted here as well is because if the family felt all the other comments needed to be removed from that website, it shouldn't be re-posted on ANY website.

I want to point out one thing: If she did meet up with her estranged husband at the McDonald's AFTER she dropped her boyfriend off at work that morning, why are the police saying the boyfriend was the last to see her alive? Food for thought.

Mommabrac said...

I apologize....the comment was deleted from KTRK but not from KHOU.

Anonymous said...

Deborah said "I want to point out one thing: If she did meet up with her estranged husband at the McDonald's AFTER she dropped her boyfriend off at work that morning, why are the police saying the boyfriend was the last to see her alive? Food for thought."

Exactly my thought.

Maggie said...

Deborah, I am just this afternoon seeing this case here, so I didnt see the comments you're referring to, and I'm not sure if you know the family or not, but I will say the boyfriend's comments are concerning as well as unusual. I am getting the impression from his words that he was a "dramatic" type of personality. One thing I also notice is that his statement "she always wanted a kiss, so soft" is kind of poetic, "soft" language followed immediately by the statement "I don't know where Melissa is at" which is kind of a curt, uneducated-sounding statement (the way it is worded). What concerns me is that the statement about the soft kiss seems non-genuine to me. Why only "a soft kiss" (one kiss). Could he be revealing that he himself is/was mentally or even physically abusive, never gave her a "soft kiss", that he treated her roughly??

Nanna Frances said...

Deborah Jaeger,

I did not see the other comment on KHOU website. I found your comment interesting because you knew the family and considered him a good guy.

I hope Melissa Sowders will be found alive and well. Too many cases do not have good endings.

I also hope you continue to read this blog and join us in commenting.

Nanna Frances said...

The Houston Chronicle reported:

Melissa Rene Sowders was reported missing after she was last seen about 11 a.m. the day after Christmas at a McDonald's restaurant at 339 FM 1960 near Interstate 45, according to the Harris County Sheriff's Office.

The article does not say if she met her estranged husband there.

Shelley said...

I wish there were more statements by the boyfriend and I agree, this reporting is horrible.

They really need to be trained better when doing interviews.

I will be hoping for more details and for boyfriend and ex husband to both speak. Which appears has not happened.

And anyone that is interested, Chelsea Hoffman (profiler) has put in a petition to demand more information on the Hannah Anderson case. Specifically asking for information on any fingerprints on the crowbar, DNA testing done on the used condoms (I personally think Hanna was involved with Jim) etc.

Teenagers act alone in vicious murders every day so I don’t think it’s fair to just say she was innocent which seems to be the case here.

She lied when she said that the 13 texts were needed as Jim did not know the address to her school or where she was. When he had been to her school for most of her practices and not only frequently took her to school, but picked her up.

She then posted that odd photo on facebook that said “#goodbye Hollywood #hello #river” which considering their next trip was too the river, that is alarming.

She said she was passed out the entire trip to the River yet I have read that the footage of them crossing the border showed Hannah was awake.

She said that they were trying to start a fire as Jim wanted to signal for help. Yet the reporter never asked about this? I mean, you just said you didn’t signal the horseback riders for help because Jim threatened your life. So why shortly after was he himself trying to signal for help?

Shelley said...

Also watched a very interesting case this weekend on Irene Garza who appeared to have been murdered by a priest (in 1960 in Texas (seems to be common to get away with murder there).

She had gone to see him for confession and never returned home. One of his personal belongings was found right next to her body in the lake. He failed the lie detector and 24 days prior to this, had been arrested for attacking another woman. (only fined) Yet despite all this, nothing was ever done and the church just moved him to a monastery far away.

Years later, a priest that was with him at that church came forward and later a monk at the monestary. Both said he confessed to them. But being that in that world they were for years told to obey and not go against the church, they both kept quiet. But the guilt got to them by 2002.

So the DA now knew this and refused to take to the Grand Jury.

The family pushed and the Grand Jury heard the case in 2004 but they did not have the witnesses stating Feit confessed and Feit himself was not there to testify. So they had basically nothing to go on.

So they voted not to indict.

And Feit (a grandfather) now lives in Arizona. CNN tried to talk to him. This is the transcript from that brief conversation.

(on camera): Mr. Feit, I'm Gary Tuchman with CNN. I want to talk to you about Irene Garza.

FEIT: Good for you.

TUCHMAN (voice-over): We wanted to hear John Feit's version of what happened. We wanted his response to those that say he's guilty of rape and murder.

(on camera): Back in 1960, this Texas Ranger memorandum says you expressed guilt to the Texas Rangers about killing Irene Garza. Is this true?

Do you ever have trouble sleeping at night?
Can you just answer that question?
The McAllen police and Texas Rangers believe you killed Irene Garza. Are you worried about that, sir? Are you concerned?

(voice-over): Feit would not answer our questions. But when we interviewed him five years ago, Feit had more to say.

(on camera): Did you commit the murder of Irene Garza?

FEIT: Interesting question. The answer is no.

TUCHMAN: He also told us what he thought of Dale Tacheny, the former monk who says Feit admitted murdering Irene.

(on camera): He says you told him you committed the murder.

FEIT: I think he's demented.

TUCHMAN: What about the priest, Father O'Brien? He says you committed the murder too. He knew you very well, sir.


TUCHMAN: What does that mean, sir?

FEIT: Look it up.

TUCHMAN (voice-over): He was speaking Latin, with the reference to the late Father O'Brien. It means "do not speak ill of the dead."

Also, the Arizona republic had tried to interview Feit at one point. When asked by the reporter whether he was a danger to the community he said “Look at my record for the past 45 years.”Robert Nelson, “Altar Ego,” Phoenix New Times, July 7, 2005.

Interesting comment since it had been 45 years since Irene Garza’s murder.

Maggie said...

"She called me and said she was there AND EVERYTHING."

--"and everything"---linguistically this is on par with "you know": an effort to convince that she called him
OR an indication that he is not being honest about what she said to him on the phone
Any chance he called her, she said she was meeting ex-husband, he got jealous, went in pursuit, ambushed her while she was leaving or followed her in his car, forced her car off the road?

Mommabrac said...

I do know the family of the estranged husband and have extended my prayers while asking no personal questions. It's just not my business. I did see some comments on another site that people were discussing the content of Matt's Facebook page so I sent a short message that it might be best to set their pages to extreme privacy. This is a very unsettling matter for all involved and could get messy depending on who's camp you're in. I pray this girl is found alive and that it's all been a huge misunderstanding. These 4 little girls don't deserve to lose their mother at such young ages.

I still am concerned that the boyfriend was the last to see her and that he claims she called him when she got to McDonalds. It's kind of all his word that she got to the meeting with her estranged husband. One news report I saw said that her cell phone was deactivated. Why would it be deactivated if they are trying to locate her and using the cell phone pings off of cell towers is usually one way they try to locate someone? Very strange.

No, I will not ask the family to feed me info. I am speculating as everyone else is.

Maggie said...

I just watched an interview with the boyfriend. He appears to be high as a kite on meth.

Mommabrac said...

He seems to be tweaking a lot.

Maggie said...

Deborah, No question about it, he looks to be on meth.
I'm wondering now about what he does for a living, sources of income, how is he paying for the habit?
I am wondering if the foul play to Melissa could have involved robbery. Did he hurt her to get drug money?
Of course, I'm just wondering out loud.

Unknown said...

The Person giveinf the Interveiw ..Boyfreind...Has Killed her and his unborn child.
He has allowed the visitation with the EX to Happen.

An then killed her on her return.

Its obvious he knows she an his unwanted baby are no longer alive.

I suspect he likes rough sex an lots of it .
When she became pregnant she curtaioled his fondness for rough sex constantly mentioning the health of the unborn fetus.

Reminding him only gentle kisses an cuddles would be the norm from now on .

Some mens sexuall gratification instincs are animalistic.

An they will kill if there pleasure is curtailed or stopped.

Gauranteed the emphasis he places on her meeting her ex for visitation an that he talked to her on the phone an every thing is a way to avoid talking about the time after the visit with the ex.

When he killed /murderered her amn his unborn an cant say every thing but must remain silent an say the opposite of everything nothing.

Before I killed her I talked to her on the phone an everything.
That because she was alive an everything was a ok oakie doakie.

After he murdered her NOTHING..

Any lakes or ocean near this location.?

Maggie said...

ecossie--I picked up on that too. It was just such an odd thing to say, about "she always wanted a kiss, so soft"--it made me wonder if the boyfriend was into some sick S&M type thing.
The boyfriend is definitely high on meth in the one interview I saw.
It is very sad. It sounds like for some reason she thought this guy was better than the previous, but it does sound good to me.

Maggie said...

sorry, it should say "it does not sound good" in post above. Very tired while writing.

Maggie said...

One last observation: from watching news report on this case, why did the white car that belonged to the two of them (Melissa and her boyfriend) have one black door (the driver's door)?
I am wondering who owned the car--her or the boyfriend? What was the point of having the one black door? Seeing as the boyfriend is high on meth in the interview, I am wondering is the one black door thing related to drug dealing in some way?

Anonymous said...

Couple of thoughts:

1. I'm originally from that part of the country, and the suffix "and everything" is quite common to mean nothing really at all. So I don't take that too seriously.

2. Watching the video of the boyfriend, he's sobbing but no tears are coming out. Bad sign.

3. I know, I'm a turd. LOL

Kellie Sue said...

I think the boyfriend is setting up the ex-husband. The boyfriend is shaking his head no through most of what he's saying, his crying is forced and dry. He's already speaking of her in the past tense and his talk of kissing is unexpected. He says he knows she won't be alive. It's just all a little too forced.

Mommabrac said...

I have read many blogs which state that the reason they are searching this particular creek is because her car was found close by. That cannot be true. The news reports state that the car was found at a transport company on the feeder road just north of Richey Rd. and the creek is just a short walk from that location. This is not true. I lived in that area for many years and the area they are searching is several MILES from the location of the car. The news stated last night that the area and creek they are searching is the place that the ex husband likes to fish. Why aren't they searching the area that the car was found in?

Other comments that her family keeps making is that the ex husband was very abusive and that she was terrified of him. If he was so abusive and she was so terrified of him, why in the world would she leave him for another man and leave her children behind? Men who abuse their wives normally come from abusive families and let me tell you, this ex came from a very loving and normal family with no abuse whatsoever.

The father keeps bringing up the Xmas card stating that now that she's with the new boyfriend, she will be around more. Could it be that the reason she wasn't around more before is because she used the ex husbands family as an excuse to not be around? Maybe she used the abuse situation to justify why she left one man (with the children) and ran off with another man only to get pregnant immediately by him so she would look better to her family.

Just some thoughts.....

Maggie said...

Deborah, just ignore the troll. We've all been subjected to this from him. He loves to attack me too. We care about what you are saying. Just ignore him--he's a complete idiot.

Mommabrac said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Maggie said...

Deborah, I am wondering what Jason does for work. I am assuming cops have verified he was dropped off at 6:15 am (and stayed there) at work. However, seeing as how he is a meth user, I am wondering how he would maintain employment he has to be at for 6:15 am?

Mommabrac said...

One of his 3 Facebook profiles state that he worked at a recycling center in Tomball. I have to wonder if he works somewhere in the vicinity of Richey Rd and I-45 where her vehicle was found. Somewhere where he could've dropped it off at such an early hour and walked to work claiming she dropped him off nearby.

TrishapatK said...

I noticed a few posters mentioning a video of the boyfriend, Jason Sanford, and finally found it online. My oh my ... what strange comments he makes. He certainly references her in the past tense and also implies that he knows she was hurt and says that she was perfect and can't see how anyone could hurt her. His facial expressions were odd, certainly didn't seem natural and didn't seem appropriate for the situation. I thought that he appeared to be "acting" in a way that he thought he should act. His acting was poor and just made me suspect him.
I used to paint facial expressions for bookcovers so I've had to pay attention to what naturally happens to faces when the muscles pull them when a person is feeling certain things.It's very much in keeping with Paul Ekmans studies. His facial expressions are not in keeping with what a distressed, concerned, scared man would be exhibiting. His words are odd too, Karen Gough would probably be able to see plenty of marbles slipping out. Besides referencing her in the past tense he started out saying that she dropped him off at work and that was the last time he saw her. It seems like the type of alibi building and "that's the end of conversation" stuff that Peter points out to us.
I strongly suspect that the boyfriend is responsible for her demise, not her estranged husband.

Unknown said...

Hi TrishapatK,

Would you mind posting a link to the video? I'd like to see the actual video of him speaking too.

Maggie said...

Deborah, I too have read discrepancies of where the actual vehicle was parked.
That is interesting that he claims to work at a recycling center.
I wonder if this is the actual place of his employment.
I agree I wonder if he works nearby and could have even returned to McDonald's on foot after he was dropped off or have been walking along the road and she picked him back up.

Maggie said...

Trisha, that is interesting about the facial expressions in the video.
I feel one "marble" that leaked out is when he says "I don't know why anyone or ANYTHING would want to hurt her." I wonder if this is him leaking that he hurt her with a weapon (a thing) and is distancing himself from it by phrasing it as "(a thing) would want to hurt her.

Maggie said...

Jen, above is the link for the interview with the boyfriend.

Anonymous said...

Peter, you said: "...This is not from a parent of a missing child..."

But he is a parent of a missing child, an unborn baby...

Mommabrac said...

We will have to see if the boyfriend is indeed the father of the unborn child.

Unknown said...

Thank you!

Unknown said...

I'm surprised that she hasn't been found yet. It doesn't look good. Tim Miller from Equisearch was quoted saying that it was now a recovery effort, rather than rescue.

The video of the boyfriend is a doozy. In his frazzled, cigarette waving chatter, his first sentence is his alibi, the next he speaks of her in past tense, and about something or someone 'hurting her'. (Passive and distant language)

But I also find it strange that the 'ex-husband' hasn't spoken out at all, even if just on behalf of his children. The video link above reports Sowder's father said that 'her ex seemed more concerned about police questioning, than her disappearance'.

Seems like they should have.more information to go on by now? Did she ever make it to McDonald's? Id there video footage of her there? Did bf clock in at work when he said? Did he stay there? Did Melissa really call him when he says she did to report that she was at McDonalds? Etc.

Maggie said...

Jen, I also don't understand why the ex-husband hasn't spoken out. Also, depending on how old the youngest daughter was that she was supposed to meet at McDonald's, wouldnt the police have been able to talk to her and ask what happened. They could at least figure out if the Dad and her left with the Mom. I really doubt the Dad left on his own for any length of time with the Mom bc someone would have noticed the young child left unattended. Or was the child even there?
Ridiculous that they are not even saying what the father and child report to have occurred during and post mcdonalds meeting!

Maggie said...

Well, just read that the youngest daughter was 18 mos, so obviously the police cant ask her questions.

elf said...

I don't think men really think about a baby being their baby until its born. They don't have the bond a mother does.

BostonLady said...

With no statement from the ex husband it is difficult to know if he was involved. But, the video interview of her current boyfriend is bizarre. He doesn't seem all there. Something is off. Now that could be his normal demeanor or how he reacts to stress but he is unable to stand still while answering questions. His voice goes up 10 octaves when he first starts speaking and doesn't sound natural.

I hope she is found soon.

Anonymous said...

The family admits they think she is dead.

Unknown said...

Quote from Sowards boyfriend:

"She's pregnant," said Jason Sanford, her boyfriend. "We're supposed to be having a baby. She wanted to spend the rest of her life with me."

-He starts with the strong declaration, "She's pregnant" (present tense), but then weakens it by stating "We're SUPPOSED to be having a baby". So he now sees them having a baby as something that may or may not happen, (which considering the circumstances is a sad reality, although it's a bit soon to have surrendered hope).

He uses 'we're' showing unity when speaking about the baby, but in his next sentence he reports what SHE wanted (to spend the rest of her life with him), rather than stating WE wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, or something similar showing unity and co-operation regarding their future.

The boyfriend's demeanor is concerning, but I'm most interested in reading a statement from the estranged husband, and more info from LE. What does he have to say about the allegations of abuse, and the idea that she was 'terrified' of him? LE hasn't even confirmed whether he actually met her at McDonald's that day, or what he claims happened!

Anonymous said...

The ex husband is no longer cooperating with LE.

sha said...

“If they find her, she’s not going to be here anymore,” Sanford said. “I fear the worst. I love you baby. I miss you so much. I want you to come home.”


That sounds like someone thinking that as long as nobody ever recovers the BODY they can all go along believing she's still alive, still 'here' with us.

sha said...

The assertion that SHE wanted to spend the rest of HER LIFE with him doesn't bode well in my opinion either.
Is he the sole reason that she would not take off and leave on her own? Is he holding himself up that way, like...she'da never left me.
What about him? Why didn't he say he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her, or WE wanted to spend the rest of OUR LIVES TOGETHER.

Lemon said...

Link re: Anon's post above:

"Detectives say Matthew Sowders is not in custody. Investigators say while he was initially cooperative, he is no longer talking to them."

Maggie said...

I believe her claims that the ex was abusive and that she was terrified of him.
However, unfortunately, in this situation, you have to also factor in the meth addict boyfriend
and what his behavior could have been like.
I also wonder, and this is not in any way to disparage her, but I am wondering about the unfortunate possibility the boyfriend may have gotten Melissa involved in using meth.
I'll come right out and be honest. Meth addicts will do anything to get money. Could they have gone to the truck stop to get drugs/sell drugs/could the boyfriend have killed her when she refused to hand over something to him ie. cash or something worth money???

Maggie said...

Is there any possibility she could have overdosed and this might explain why Jason said he doesn't know why "something" would want to hurt her?

Anon "I" said...

We don't know what the ex said to the police in the first place. He may have said "I didn't do it." The police would naturally keep asking him about details he might not know anything about.... We need more language to be able to analyze. It seems logical that he would lawyer-up if he was being accused and the first thing a lawyer will tell him is to stop talking. The police would equate not talking with not cooperating. I'm not saying he's innocent, but the comments made by the boyfriend sure are hinky.

Anon "I"

Anonymous said...

I said it before but I will repeat it. The notion of having a black car door has anything to do with drug dealing is absurd. It gas been noted all over the family is poor. When you are poor and need to do auto repairs it saves so much $ going to a junk yard and getting a misc. part yourself than paying a dealer/mechanic. Yes this leads to sometimes a different color hood/door but it can also save a poor family of 4 over $1000. Not like thet are out driving a nice BMW with 1 different door. Come on now.

Anonymous said...

Maggie, with all due respect, I think you are making too much out of the black door on the car. Haven't you ever seen a replacement door (hood, trunk lid, door or whatever) where the replacement part was a different color than the body of the car?

What this means is that for whatever reason (obviously a damaged door in this case), that the owner of the car had to purchase a replacement door from a junkyard or some other source who was partsing out pieces from a car that was no longer in use. This is very common.

The entire car would need to be repainted so that the replacement door matched the body of the car, which had not yet been done in this case. Seriously, I can't see where an old unrepainted replacement car door would have any bearing on Ms Sowders' sad fate.

Anonymous said...

BTW, it isn't just poor people who purchase replacement auto parts from junkyards, off craigslist or wherever. It is not uncommon for others to purchase cheaper auto replacement parts as well, particularly in low liability insurance settlements and on older cars where replacement parts are difficult to find and new replacement parts have been terribly inflated.

Sometimes people can afford to have their auto repainted and sometimes they can't and have to leave the odd unmatched color as it is. My guess is that this couple could not afford to have the car repainted and had to drive it as is.

Let's face it, if true; the dude only worked at a trash recycling facility for low wages and I don't think she worked at all, did she?

Anonymous said...

There's so much about this couple and the ex that we don't know. We know that Melissa was only 26 yrs old, had four children by her ex husband (or were all four his children?); that she left with him, or did he take them away from her? Was she divorced from her husband and did he gain custody of the children?

We know that the youngest child was only 18 mos old and she was pregnant again by her new boyfriend with whom she was living. Did they plan to marry and make a home for their child or just live together?

How did they plan to survive with the new boyfriend earning such low wages, having no career path and Melissa not working? Or was she working? It sounds like she jumped out of the frying pan into the fire, financially speaking; also in the loss of her children. That is, unless she was being abused by her husband and felt she had nowhere else to turn.

I can't see where the loser boyfriend could have been dabbling in much dope unless he was selling dope. Not saying he wasn't on dope but he certainly couldn't afford much dope unless he was cooking/selling meth or had some other avenue for drug running, etc.

If this is true, surely Melissa would have known about this when she hooked up with him, or in very short order. Was Melissa on drugs too? Is this a bad drug deal gone wrong?

Anonymous said...

To Deborah Jaeger; I was wondering if you might be able to shed some light on some of the above questions since you seem to know the Sowder family? T/Y!

Mommabrac said...

All 4 children were by the estranged husband. She left him and the 4 little girls for the new boyfriend. The estranged husband filed for divorce as anyone would when the wife leaves for another man. My assumption is that when the divorce was filed with children involved, the court would naturally assign a temp order for the children based on the circumstances at that time. Since she left him and the children, I would think that the courts would temporarily give him the children until everything was sorted out and then make a decision on future custody. They are still in the midst of a divorce. I do not know Melissa so I cannot speculate on anything about her.

I did speak to a cop friend about this and he said that they could be searching the estranged husbands truck to eliminate him as a suspect. He also said that search warrants aren't as easy to get as it shows on TV. You have to have probable cause to get one.

Searching and questioning is routine to narrow down suspects and eliminate suspects so this could anywhere.

I am basing my views on the fact that I know the family's story, history and character as I believe most people who know them will do. There's a saying I recently came across which is:

Those who know me, don't doubt me and those who doubt me never knew me.

My husband and I went thru a criminal court case for 2 years in another country where my husband was railroaded on a bogus, trumped up charge. He was found not guilty in the end but we ended up finding out who our real friends were during the process. I would like to think that if something similar to this situation ever happened to us, people who knew us would know what type of character we had and whether we were capable of something like this.

Maggie said...

To anon: Thank you. Yes I know about getting replacement parts from a junk yard. The black door looks odd though, like it was spray-painted black or something. It doesnt look like a natural paint job.
Why am I making such a big deal out of it? Well, this isnt just a random car driving down the street. It's the car of a missing person that was left at a truck stop, so I feel this detail is important. Especially right now, as they have not yet named a suspect.

Maggie said...

Also, look at a picture of the car. You can see the door has been altered to turn it black. The side mirror attached to the black door is white, and at the top you can see it is rough, it looks there is black tape of something on it over the driver car door window.

Anonymous said...

“If they find her, she’s not going to be HERE anymore,” Sanford said. “I fear the worst. I love you baby. I miss you so much. I want you to come home.”

IMO he is saying if they find her THERE, that confirms her death. If she is found dead, she will not be HERE anymore.(Here: in this world).

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
“If they find her, she’s not going to be HERE anymore,” Sanford said. “I fear the worst. I love you baby. I miss you so much. I want you to come home.”

IMO he is saying if they find her THERE, that confirms her death. If she is found dead, she will not be HERE anymore.(Here: in this world).
anon, listen to the video. sandford didn't say 'here anymore'',,,,,.....,,,,,, he said 'alive anymore'

Logical said...

I'm betting Melissa's father knew the ex-husband's behavior very well and confidently doubts him. Ex husband may have a good upstanding family, but he is responsible for his own reputation, behavior and character.

I think the boyfriend is high, strung out, insecure, needy, paranoid and unconfident in himself as a functioning citizen. His conversations with reporters may be rambling statements reflecting of all above.......and lack of social skills while in the presence of cameras and reporters.

Then again.....Who knows? Stay tuned to upcoming news updates.

Anonymous said...

i thought i read in news that she was a manager at the mcdonalds, maybe that is what was meant by "she was there and everything", perhaps she planned on catching up on some paperwork while there.

another miss quote of the reporter that really makes a big difference to us, the father did not list physical abuse first, mental abuse was said first.
this was the worst transcription i have ever seen.

Anonymous said...

replacement body parts come primed black. they can match a cars paint with a computer scanning thingy so they only have to paint the new part and it will match really close to the rest of the car.
of course the handle, window, mirror and rubber seal around the edge would have to be switched over. that rubber seal can cost up to $200 alone, and until the door is painted, you wouldnt want to put it on, perhaps that is the reason for what appears to be tape around the edge.
if the car had been totaled by the insurance company, then repairing it yourself will leave a couple thousand dollars in your pocket, sometimes even coming out getting the car for free.
imo, not being able to manage your car is a sign how worthless one is in other areas of their life. but also in this case, it reflects how she was building a new life all over again from scrap.
in my town, our recycling center is manned by people working off community service...

Anonymous said...

Anonymous @ 1:09, it is not true that replacement auto body parts come primed in black (or any other color). It all depends on the junkyard dealer/supplier or other individual where the parts are purchased and if you (the customer) are willing to pay for the part to be primed and what color you request.

In fact, most replacement parts are more often NOT primed as the savings is in the customer removing the replacement parts from the junked automobile themselves; and when they are pre-primed it is usually a primer shade of grey, not black.

Wow, how judgmental! I disagree on your comment that not being able to manage your car (on a moments notice?) is a sign how worthless one is in other areas of their life. You've got a lot to learn about life!

There can be many occasions in ones' life when not everything falls into place on the minute and this does not make one worthless in other areas of their life.

HoustonTX said...

Deborah Jaeger said...
I am basing my views on the fact that I know the family's story, history and character as I believe most people who know them will do.

~ Sowders Cousin Says~
"Pretty much from the first day that we knew she was missing, and the circumstances of how she went missing. We knew. We knew," Michelle Bierman, Sowders' cousin, told reporters Monday afternoon.
Bierman described Sowders as "terrified" of her ex. Other family told KHOU that he was abusive and angry that she had a new boyfriend and was pregnant with his child.

HoustonTX said...

Deborah Jaeger said...
I do know the family of the estranged husband and have extended my prayers while asking no personal questions. It's just not my business. I did see some comments on another site that people were discussing the content of Matt's Facebook page so I sent a short message that it might be best to set their pages to extreme privacy.

What was the nature of the content? Why do you feel Matt needs to be protected? Thank you in advance.

Anonymous said...

The comments under the first two photos leave one thinking he is on the run with the kids.

Mommabrac said...

Other bloggers and commenters have taken a certain piece of content from his page about moving to Oklahoma and have run with it. Claiming he ran off with the kids and all kinds of speculation. When you're searching the Internet trying to info on a case, social media is the first place you go. Then those who found info will misinterpret it and others take it as gospel. That's my reasoning behind it as there's nothing incriminating on the Facebook.

Melissa's family is extremely angry that their loved one is missing and presumed dead. When anger takes control of emotions, anything is said and they usually need someone to blame as it makes them feel better. It's human nature. The boyfriends estranged wife has said that HE was abusive on her Facebook but no one is acknowledging this. Someone claims the boyfriend was abusive, Melissa's family claim the estranged husband was abusive. Either Melissa picks men who are abusive or the media is dealing with a bunch of uneducated people who will say anything to vent their anger on TV.

I prefer to look at the facts which are: they have never stated in the media whether she actually met her estranged husband at McDonalds but have said that's the last place she was seen. They also claim that the boyfriend was the last person to see her. The estranged husband supposedly only took the 18 month child with him so what are the chances he did something bad to her with a small child in tow. The car was found miles away from the McDonalds and they are searching 4 miles away from where the car was found. She left her estranged husband AND their 4 children for another man and the estranged husband filed for divorce. Who would leave their 4 children with a supposed abuser and what abuser files for divorce? If she was "terrified" of him, why meet him alone? Why not take her cousin who seems to be so close to her and knows everything about her life with him? Why wouldn't her beloved boyfriend ask her to wait until a family member could go with her to meet her estranged husband?

Lawyering up seems like a smart move on the estranged husbands part. The boyfriend was all over the media saying crazy things that have made the majority of the public nervous and suspicious of him. Are we all misinterpreting him because of what we see of him on TV? So, imagine that the estranged husband saw this and said to himself, I shouldn't talk to anyone but my lawyer and the police because people will only misinterpret things I say as well.

If you'll notice all current media video and reports don't include the boyfriend anymore. They have completely stopped talking to him at all. The mother and father are no where to be found anymore after saying that they know she's gone. The only person talking to the media is the cousin and if you'll notice in the latest media video, she seems to have gotten a complete hair and makeup makeover.

Melissa had left her estranged husband a little over 2 months ago and is 2 months pregnant.

When you analyze all these things, you come up with a very distorted picture and it seems that the police are keeping everything they know close to their vest. It'll come out in the end, whenever that may be.

Mommabrac said...

99% of what Matt normally (before all this happened) posted are of his kids.

HoustonTX said...

Thank you Deborah, I see the points you are making in your answer.

HoustonTX said...

Deborah Jaeger said...
99% of what Matt normally (before all this happened) posted are of his kids.

The children appear to be happy in those photos as well. Natural unforced beautiful smiles.

Anonymous said...

a complete hair and makeup makeover. .... lots of donations coming in.... gotta look good for the cameras for her 15 minutes of fame.
abused women attracted to abusive men, yes, it is familiar to them which is comforting, plus they see it as a sign that they must care about them or they wouldn't get mad/jealous/or w/e and hit them or w/e.
many women do leave their kids behind, at that point it is their only sight to get away and save themselves. but she had somewhere to go, and she was getting visits.... im thinking the abuse allegations were custody/divorce stunts women pull.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
a complete hair and makeup makeover. gotta look good for the cameras
Anon....would you shave for the cameras? Fix your hair to look presentable? It takes more steps for us women to look presentable to the public. Thanks to the skewed vision of the world today. Lol :)

Is there really a donation fund set up for the cousin? Wow.

Anonymous said...

i believe the boyfriend was at work, i believe she did meet with the Ex. i wonder if during that meeting things were discussed that upset her? because her car was such a distance from mcdonalds.... perhaps after driving down the road she decided eeefff it all, got out and stomped down the road ranting to herself trying to sort her issues. perhaps the first car that stopped and offered her a ride, she accepted just to get away from it all.
i think the distant searches are just random places just to be searching to be searching although there is no indication or reason to believe she was ever there.

Anonymous said...

I think the car was left in a different location so that it wouldn't be close to wherever the location Melissa was left at

Anonymous said...

Lazy efforts though and guilty party wanted to be finished with the deed quickly.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps they were following each other, ex pulled over, Melissa pulls over, then tricked into riding with ex to see the other kids, then he murders her and hides her

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 2:28, at no time were we ever talking about new factory replacement parts. We were always talking about purchasing automotive replacement parts from a junkyard or other private source.

Anonymous said...

When this story first developed, the ex-husbands name was not released. Now, according to some posts, the ex-husbands name is known. So, first thought may be that the ex-husband had something to do with her disappearance. As the story develops, it seems as though the current boyfriend is the guilty one and that the ex-husband is not. Did Matthew Sowder see Melissa that day she went missing? Have cameras at Jasom Sanford's place of employment been checked to confirm his story that he was dropped off at work by Melissa? It seems odd that this kind of information is not available...what are investigators waiting for---the publicity that this story has gotten should be a good enough reason to provide information (within reason, of course) to the public so that we won't worry as much.

Anonymous said...

Not meaning to sound disparaging of the victim; but how frightened of her abusive ex could Melissa have been if she was cheating on him right under his nose?

My guess is that she was cheating on him if she only left him two months ago and is now already two months pregnant.

My thinking is if you are scared to death of your husband you aren't out running around on him for fear he would beat the living daylights outa you. Wouldn't ya think?

MM said...

I haven't seen all the news on this story, is it possible that Mellissa phone last pinged near the area that is being searched?

Anonymous said...

Been watching the news videos and the girls parents aren't there anymore. It looks like the searchers and the police are the only ones that care if she will be found. What's up with the cousin because she looks like she's a movie star now.

Anonymous said...

"Sowders planned to meet her ex-husband and their youngest daughter at a McDonald’s on FM 1960 near Kuykendahl Road, but didn’t show."

Anonymous said...

As a follow up to my post made at 3:57 yesterday; I'd like to say that I would probably have been cheating too, or trying to get outta there anyway I could, if I had an abusive husband and frantically needed to find a quick way out of his trap of abuse. When you think about it logically, just keeping a woman pregnant all the time is abusive within itself.

Only thing, I think I could have found someone who wasn't such a loser, an obvious illiterate, and possibly another woman abuser as well. Poor woman. She had no chance for any kind of decent survival.

I feel sorry for the circumstances she got herself in, having one baby after another and being trapped. Now this. Missing. Dead. Her babies having lost their mother; all such painful tragedy. I pray she is at final rest and peace now as she apparently didn't have any on this earth.

Nanna Frances said...

Body Found:

Anonymous said...

so maybe TES had some cell phone ping info to go on?
if boy friend says she was at mcdonalds, but news reports say she never made it there.......
and wouldnt LE know if the call was made saying she was there?
i wish the news reporters could word it correctly/factually.
because LE asked about tattoos, meaning LE is still talking to boy friend, does that mean he is not suspect?

Anonymous said...

@ anon, January 1, 2014 at 2:20 PM
Wow, how judgmental! I disagree on your comment that not being able to manage your car (on a moments notice?) is a sign how worthless one is in other areas of their life. You've got a lot to learn about life!

why should we believe "light drugs" will lead to hard drugs, or addiction will lead to theft, or that a pedophile will offend again at a greater level?
if you make poor choices, you make poor choices, period. if you don't have it together, you don't have it together.

the opposite:
it is proven, if you clean your work place, clear your desk, keep up with maintenance, you will be more productive in other things you do. successful in one thing keeps you on top in other things. that is why some people are always winners.

Anonymous said...

After looking through the Facebook of the boyfriend and his estranged wife, as well as reading all the different articles; I am leaning more towards the boyfriend!!! I think he is still in love with his estranged wife! A baby by another woman would hinder that reconciliation indefinitely!

Kellie Sue said...

Nanna Frances said...

The estranged husband has been arrested.