Tuesday, March 12, 2013

"That's What She Said"

"Let's Go...Yankees?"
Sometimes I am asked for 'real life" uses of analysis.  Here's one from this afternoon that highlights a principle or two.  The account is true and has no deception in it.  It does show an attempt to deceive, even if in a humorous package.

I went into a convenience store and purchased three things:

1.  A can of "fix a flat" as Heather's car may have a slow leak in one of her tires;
2.  Gas
3.  Five (5) one-dollar scratch off tickets.

Now, in our family, scratch off tickets are purchased for special occasions only.  We put them in the Christmas stockings, under the plates at Thanksgiving and Christmas, and in birthday cards. Beyond that, we consider it a waste of money, and other than an occasional dollar, it isn't something we generally do outside of holidays.  At holiday time, it is, however, a lot of fun.

I was at the counter, waiting for the clerk, staring at them, thinking whether or not I paid a particular bill.  As I struggled to remember if I had, in deed, mailed out that bill or not, I asked for a scratch off ticket.  It must have been the "Win $2,000 Instantly!" that caught my eye, just as I was lightly fretting about bill paying.  (How's that for an imperfect storm?)  I asked for a scratch off ticket.

"How many do you want, sir?"

I wasn't expecting that.  I asked for "a" scratch off ticket, singular.

Without missing a beat, I said,
"Five, please.  Give me five losing scratch off tickets."  The clerk smiled.

I like to make clerks, waiters, waitresses and those who work in the Drive Thru windows smile a bit, when I can.  Life is tough enough without sour customers.  Plus, I don't want anyone spitting in my coffee.

When I got into the car, my son, eyeballing the scratch off tickets as if it was Thanksgiving,  said, "Dad?"

I smiled.

"What are you going to say about these?", he asked.

The phone rang.

It was my chance to have some fun.  The caller ID:  "Heather" calling on my cell.  I handed the phone to Sean:

"Say this, son:  say, 'Dad bought you a can of fix a flat for your car and filled your gas tank and he bought nothing more" and see what she says."

Sean smiled slightly; that knowing smile shared between a father and son when they are about to pull a fast one one mom that both of them know mom will not fall for.

Yet, still, he had to wonder:  Would she catch us in our little game of deception?

Would Heather recognize our attempt to deceive?

"Uh, hi.  Dad told me to tell you that he bought a can of fix a flat for your car, and got you gas, and nothing more."

Heather doesn't miss a thing.

"Sean, tell Dad I said 'thanks' for the fix a flat and the gas.  Dad knew I needed that.

"I will", said Sean, sounding a bit disappointed.

Heather than said, "Sean, what else did your father buy?"

Sean's smile on his face widened at this point.

"Uh, what do you mean?  He told me to tell you that he bought the can of fix a flat, and gas for your car, and that he bought nothing more."

Heather said, "Seanny, its not possible to buy 'nothing'.  What else did he buy?"

Sean said, "But that's what Dad said!"  Even while joking, Sean will not lie.  He even struggles at Christmas time when we are deliberately trying to deceive in fun, while buying presents one for another.

He held the phone away and said, "She got ya, Dad!"


Of the five scratch off tickets, we won $1.  We spent $5 just to lose $4.

However, Sean learned a good lesson:

Don't even try to deceive.  


John Mc Gowan said...

~Doffs Hat to heather~

Statement Analysis Blog said...

The lighter side of analysis?

dadgum said...

I have yet to buy a lottery ticket (or more than one, for that matter). Just a little to the right of miserly.

Congrats on the $1 Peter, and on a lesson well taught.

JerseyJane said...

Dad told me to tell you...

Okkkkkk, not happening, just turning the phone over, says enough!!!!! Hahaha in the mommy world!!!!!

Wes said...

I love Heather's statement:

"Seanny, its not possible to buy 'nothing'"

That was a fun way to demonstrate that what a person wants to hide from you will often dictate what they say.

Anonymous said...

Re: Heiholdt Murder Conviction of Ryan Ferguson

Peter - based on the transcripts from the first trial - there is indication that 2 videos of Ryan being interviewed about the murder happened while Ryan was in transit from KC to Columbia by Police. Also the transcript indicates he was read his rights while in custody in KC, was interviewed by Ryan states no video of that interrogation. Just an FYI regarding the transcripts of the interrogations. Also, here-say Erin Moriarty has much to gain for the 48 hours episode. She is supposidly related to the Ferguson family either by marriage or blood or friendship.

Statement Analysis Blog said...

I have requested the transcripts but did not receive them.

I would have been glad to write up a full SCAN report.


Tania Cadogan said...

Busted !

PS i am glad you endeavor to make those who work with the public smile.

My new year resolution and one i have kept for many years is... to make at least one person smile each day.

I happily chat away to taxi and bus drivers, staff in supermarkets especially the checkout person since all too often i have seen customers completely ignore them, not even a please or thank you, they treat them as part of the fixtures.

I will ask how they are or what they have been up to if i haven't seen them for a while, i will reccommend an item if i have tried it before and it's new. for a few minutes they are the centre of my world., I hope i make them smile, i hope i leave them feeling appreciated and good about themselves, I hug everybody to make them feel good about themselves, to make them feel special and because i want to.
I chat away on buses to passengers, on benches to anyone i feel needs a few kind words, i compliment strangers on their clothes, their hair, their scent, it make them feel good, they too get hugged (i will always ask if i can hug them, no one has ever said no) I remember in a restaurant in houston an elderly coupl were chatting away after th end of their meal, the old lady had a lovely hot pink sequined cap and no hair or eyebrows. I complimented her on her hat and hugged her. It made my day when out in the parking lot she turned and gave her hubby a big hug, hugs spread like ripples in a pond.

I also find that if i am polite and nice and cheerful to others, i get better service, they remember the nice one rather than the rude ones and, i hope they do the same to others, maybe one day everyone will be happy, polite and considerate to others because someone somewhere was the same to them.

Anonymous said...

Hold the phone … those were spoken words, not text messages, correct?

Humor aside, kudos for teaching your child a valuable lesson.
Those are keepers, and passed on thru generations.

John Mc Gowan said...


Kim Jong-Un Threatens To 'Wipe Out' Island
The unpredictable North Korea leader briefs his troops as he threatens to destroy an island belonging to his neighbour.4:39pm UK, Tuesday 12 March 2013
Kim Jong-Un holds a guitar during his visit to military chiefs

North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un has threatened to "wipe out" a South Korean island as diplomatic tensions between the neighbouring countries escalate.

The communist state has been making noises about nuclear war in response to UN sanctions imposed after its third atomic test last month.

It has also announced its unilateral shredding of the 60-year-old Korean War armistice and non-aggression pacts with Seoul in protest at an ongoing South Korean-US military exercise.

While most of these statements have been dismissed as rhetorical bluster, the latest threat to the border island of Baengnyeong, which has around 5,000 civilian residents, appears credible and carries the weight of precedent.

In 2010, the South Korean naval vessel Cheonan was sunk in the area of Baengnyeong with the loss of 46 lives, and later that year North Korea shelled the nearby island of Yeonpyeong, killing four people.

On a visit to frontline artillery units, Kim Jong-Un briefed officers on their mission "to strike and wipe out the enemies" on Baengnyeong and turn the island into a "sea of fire".

Kim waves to troops as he leaves flashpoint Baengnyeong island
"Once an order is issued, you should break the waists of the crazy enemies, totally cut their windpipes and thus clearly show them what a real war is like," Kim was quoted as saying by the Korean Central News Agency.

The leader toured military facilities with officers and was photographed holding a guitar during talks, before departing the Wolnae Islet defence unit in a wooden boat.

An administrative official on Baengnyeong, Kim Young-Gu, said civilian emergency shelters on the island had been fully stocked and all village councils put on high alert.

"It's not like there's a mass exodus of panicked islanders to the mainland. But to be honest with you, we're a bit scared," he told AFP.

The disputed sea border off the west coast was the scene of deadly naval clashes in 1999, 2002 and 2009.

Residents on a number of frontline islands have reportedly taken to sleeping in their clothes in preparation for a night-time alert.

South Korea's President faces a tricky diplomatic task
The crisis represents an early test for South Korea's new President Park Geun-Hye, who was sworn in only two weeks ago, with concerns about just how far the inexperienced Kim Jong-Un is willing to go.

Defence Ministry spokesman Kim Min-Seok said: "If the North provokes us, we will respond in ways that will cause them more harm."

The United States has risked further provoking Kim by slapping sanctions on North Korea's primary foreign exchange bank and four senior officials.

Past sanctions have failed to persuade Pyongyang to abandon its nuclear programme, but the international community hopes measures targeting financial lifelines can slow down the process and curb proliferation.http://news.sky.com/story/1063575/kim-jong-un-threatens-to-wipe-out-island

Mainah said...

Thank you for that delightful glimpse, Peter, this post made my day! I have a few funny family SA moments too.

The articles are often so brutal and weight heavy on me. I find a hug, a smile, kind words comforting. Whether sending or receiving them is an excellent self-care tool for ones toolbox.

{Hobs}, Hugs for you!

Tania Cadogan said...

Hugs right back atcha Mainah and hugs and smooches all round xx

If Kim Jong-Un wants to erase an island will he use white-out or a giant sized eraser?

Has anyone patented isle-b-gone spray for the quick removal of islands, islets and atolls?

In a variety of sizes for the small annoying bunch of rocks with the single palm tree to continent sized. Scented and unscented with or without the big kaboom.
Isle-b-gone for all your island erasing needs.
Easy to use, either use the aerosol for the smaller islands ,islets and atolls or use the larger bomb for larger areas,you may need to use multiple bombs. make sure if using the bombs you close all doors and windows on any surrounding islands and once you hve allowed sufficient time for treatment allow 24 hrs for the air to clear before revisiting the area.

Kep away from pets, small children and dictators and remember to wash your hands thoroughly when asked what happened to said island

Statement Analysis Blog said...

Thank you for the kind words, Mainah.

I will take them as a reminder to put up more light-hearted material.


Pineapple said...

"smile" is sensitive here.

Red Ryder said...

I'm with you Peter and Hobs! Civility and kindness are gifts we can bestow on others daily, cost us nothing, yet bring us joy! Smiles and eye contact all around :) An opportunity to improve another person's day with a smile and encouraging word is a gift for us!

Jen said...

I love this story and it made me smile and giggle in remembrance of my Dad. He would often tell my sister or I to, 'tell your mom I said', to bring home a pizza or takeout. (My sister and I were actually the ones who asked for pizza or whatever...but he would say it like that to joke with my Mom, because he was a VERY picky eater and would never request pizza or Chinese). There was always a better chance when Dad 'asked' for us!

Jo said...

Anon - I got a chuckle from your post. "We" spent $5.......
I am also curious why Peter asked for "a" scratch off and then purchased 5?

Mouse74 said...

Love it! Thanks for sharing that, made me laugh!!

I have to say, I admire you even more now for the following that you wrote:

"I like to make clerks, waiters, waitresses and those who work in the Drive Thru windows smile a bit, when I can. Life is tough enough without sour customers."

I never understand those that are cruel to those that work the jobs we all depend on. It just speaks so much to me on a person's character on how you treat strangers. Of course, it also matters how you treat the ones that mean the most to you, but to spread kindness to strangers.....it only helps the world that much more.

I have an acquaintance that makes it her purpose to treat servers rudely. I tell her every time that she eats spit on a regular basis, but she'll just go back to rationalizing her behavior by stating that "it's their job to do it right, so I expect nothing less". I do see wonderful parts in this person, but I also notice the drama that seems to follow her b/c of her behaviors to others.

Anyhoo....Peter, you are a wonderful soul, and your family couldn't be any luckier to have you as an example!!

Shelley said...

Statement analysis has changed a lot in my life. Growing up with a mother that lies about everything even going to the point like Jodi Arias.... My moms ex left her for the lies and she told others he was into child porn.. Which was not true. But anything to turn the focus on him. The breakup could not be her fault, it's everyone else.

Anyways, I have Also used it a lot in work and personal relationships and recognize lies often although the more I read your posts the more I catch.

You must have a very honest family. Which is rare these days. It's refreshing.

Thanks for your website. Being raised in a world of lies and breaking the cycle, this is my therapy and has even made me more truthful.

Lemon said...

Thanks for sharing this. I miss hearing Heather on the radio show :)

Sarah said...

What a blessing to have a son who is so truthful! that will serve him well and be a reflection of his parents.

Tania Cadogan said...

A beautiful picture there, I take it you weren't in maine as shorts and snow make for cold knees :)

Anonymous said...

Dear Hobs, my heros fearlessly travel the world spreading truth and seeking justice. Thank-you! Thank-you! You are the best!!!!!!!!

Sus said...

I like this. Thank you for the real-life example.

lane said...

Indian proverb, "A smile sent will always return."

Habundia said...
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